Sacrificial Circumvention
by Douttful
Summary: Marjorie Scur will weather any storm. As long as her loved ones find safe harbor from her actions. With little boundaries and invisible morals Mar takes the Capitol by storm. They fawn over her mysterious deminor. Even towards her beautiful mentor. All ignorant to the hurricane hiding in her dull green eyes. Soon the storm will be unleashed. Expect few survivors.
1. Welcome! Welcome!

Extended Summary

Marjorie Scur will weather any storm. As long as her loved ones find safe harbor from her actions. With little boundaries and invisible morals Mar takes the Capitol by storm. They fawn over her mysterious deminor. Even towards her beautiful mentor. All ignorant to the hurricane hiding in her dull green eyes. Soon the storm will be unleashed. Expect few survivors.

This story is rated M for violence and sexual content. Each chapter is a different installment in the story. Instead of chapters it's separated into parts, so they will be longer then the average chapter.

It will span the entire serese. Starting at the 67th Hunger Games and ending after the war.

Please comment! I love feed back! What do you like? what do you hate? Seriously let me know. Alright that's enough annoying you all for now. Please enjoy the story!


	2. Squall Approaching

The once bright sky was hidden under a layer of thick gray clouds. Perfect setting for such a horrible day. Esabella sat shaking in the tub. The warm water did nothing to relax her muscles. I pulled her frail form up, wrapping her in a towel. She never stopped the shaking. Leading her out to her room softly. The home was buzzing like it did every year. There were plenty of kids in the orphanage who were of age. The wretched old bag who 'ran' this place was kind enough to leave for the time being. Like the kids need her crap on top of this. She gloats each year how if one of us win she'll be rich. And if we lose she'll have one less mouth to feed. Seven. We have seven kids who are entering the drawing for the first time. Three boys, four girls. All thin and scared like most of us here. Esabella and I pass Dedreick as he's leading Kander into the bathroom. They are all so besides themselves. The odds of them getting drawn are small. But, the odds are never in our favor. Not here in this dilapidated warehouse turned orphanage. Esabella was dressed and pressed. Soon the others all followed. None of the younger kids laughed of played. Even sweet little Gaia was silent. She can't walk or talk, but she knows, just like we all do. It's almost time. Dedreick, Alnus, Rudbeckia and I lined the younger ones up. Al and Ruddy were in their last year. Rick and I had two more. I wasn't scared. Not out of ignorance, but experience. _Not much soul left to save._

"Aahh! There are my _brrrrave_ champions!" Gossypium's voice rang forcing me back to reality. I whipped around. Standing protectively in front of the kids. Good old Gossy had it in her head that we were her slaves. "Now, you all go and make me look good or there'll be hell to pay!" Gossy's eyes turned towards me. My glare not wavering. "Watch it now _sweetie_. Don't want to have the Peace Keepers hear about your little slip up hmm?" The same honey voice laced with poison I'd been forced to listen to for the last 6 years. I wanted to wipe the smirk off her face. My ' _slip up'_ wouldn't have happened if she actually gave a damn about us. Protected us. Keeping my mouth shut I headed forward. The kids all walked in silence. I felt a small hand reach for mine. Large green eyes looked up at me with worry.

"Don't worry Ari. Your mama is gonna be fine." Al stated as he passed by with his arm around Kander and Corydalis. "We all are" he said a bit louder. No one responded. Ari clung to my side. When we reached the town square my stomach dropped, the way it does every year. I shook my arm gently. Ari gripped tighter.

"Arianna let go." Stern eyes drilling into her beautiful ones. I could look at her eyes all day. Harper walked over. He gently took Ari and led her to the waiting area. The sea breeze blew my auburn curls. I let my mind blank out. Feel nothing. Just wait. We are but fish, being sent to the net. Who would be caught this year?

Euripides our escort flounced out onto the stage. High hair dyed sky blue. A suit-dress like thing? Maybe? It made him look poofy. Like a powerder puff Mom would use to put on make up. Mom. Not now. No memories now. Just wait. Eyes forward and blank. The long rambling of history of why we celebrate the game is the same as every year. Euripides' voice squeeks a bit more. I zone out, unable to take much more of the capitol shit. I have a lot to be bitter about. But things could always be worse. "As always, Ladies first." I took a deep breath of sea air. "Rudbeckia Baldrein." Shit. I had to think it. My arm shot up so fast. There was a crack, I may have popped it out of place. Panic has a tendency to give me more power than I could ever imagine.

"I volunteer as tribute!" My voice booms. Then it's like the world stops. I realize what I've done. I can't tell who's screaming my name as I walk forward. It was Ruddy's last year and she couldn't go in there. She couldn't. Not in her condition. Moving out of the crowd with a cold face I didn't look at anyone. I just let my body move. They were still screaming. Once on stage I saw Ari fighting against Ms. Thymelyn, She'd just wrestled the three year old firmly into her arms. That made this so real. A larger lump formed in my throat. Taking a shaky breath, I know what I'm leaving. Why the hell did I do this? Scanning the crowd I meet the sad hazel eyes of my best friend. I nodded. Tears were streaming down her face. One might have fallen down mine as well. I don't know, I'm not able to feel in this moment. I know what I'm leaving. But I also know what I'm saving. _I know what I'm saving._

"What is your name dear?"

"Marjorie Sur."

"Well Let's give a big hand for our female tribute Marjorie Sur!" The crowd clapped, some people were smiling at me. I don't have a lot of friends outside of the orphanage. Not anymore. My eyes glazed over as I thought about a time when I didn't know about hate. Before the fire…

"And the male tribute is….. Kallen Asie-"

"I volunteer as tribute!"

"WHAT!" The word leaves my mouth before I realize it. Al walks up on stage, shoulders squared and tall. His giant frame more impressive due to his scowl. I meet his glare and increased mine tenfold. That stupid bastard. He was free. He had his life. He was going to live. Everything we've done to keep him alive…. And he signs up for his death. Signs up to kill me… I can't even think to listen to anything after that. Rage pumps in every cell of my body. The blood is pounding in my ears so hard I can't hear a sound. Just my heart beat. I swear it echoed through all of Four. The beat of betrayal. I let the peace keepers lead me to the visiting rooms. We're separated. Sitting on the fancy worn out couch I clutch my head in my hands. Ari runs in first. Followed by Ruddy. Ari is a sobbing mess. I pull her up into my arms and hold her close.

"Mar..."

"Don't." My voice is colder than I expected. Her eyes show even more hurt. I send her a sympathetic glance. I'm going off to my death but I'm comforting her. That's the way it's been though. Ruddy may be older and larger, but I was stronger. We both knew that. "Take care of the kids, _especially_ the new one. You got that." Her eyes were wide with fear.

"How..?"

"I went through that with Kari, or did you forget?" I stated as I pulled Ari a little closer. Ruddy looked between me and Ari.

"Momma don't go!"

"Listen here." I pulled her away from me. Her perfect green eyes were wide with fear. "I'm going to leave." At that she started to ball. "Arianna listen to me!" I snapped she nodded and her beautiful green eyes focused hard on me. "I have to leave, okay. And I might not come back." The words strangled me like a vice. "But don't you forget. Near or far, where ever you are. I will be loving you. Do you understand me?" Ari started to cry, I felt tears leak down too. I held her so close. The door slammed open and Peace Keepers came in.

"Out!" I snarled on reflex. Ruddy came over. After a brief hug I shoved Ari into her arms.

"MOMMA!" Her voice broke my heart in a way only she could. Tears streamed full force down my face. The doors shut and I let a shuttered breathe leave my lungs. Soon enough Rick walked in.

"They won't let anyone else in." he stated after a pause. Replying with a stiff nod, we stood in silence.

"Gossy start betting yet?"

"What else do you expect?" sharing a bitter laugh we lapsed back into silence. Even with Dare, I had to be strong. I couldn't show fear. Not to any of them. He looked expectantly, it was clear what he wanted to ask.

"She'll tell you why soon enough Rick. Take care of them. **All of them** do you understand me?" He stood 6 inches taller but still manages to shrink under my gaze. "Ruddy is going to be useless. Do. Not. Let the younger kids watch. Do you understand me?" Tears were streaking down his tan cheeks. He nodded as well. "I'm serious Rick. Don't let anyone take any food from them okay? I don't want the kids in school. They'll be forced to watch there."

"You have to come home. One of you has to come home." I breathed as he wrapped his giant arms around me. Too many emotions. This could be the last time I was in Rick's arms. The last time, again. How many good byes do there have to be? "Promise me. Promise me you'll come home." I held him tighter.

"No." I managed to breathe out evenly. "I promise I'll fight like hell. I promise one of us will come home. I'm not promising it will be me."

"That's not goo-"

"It's all you're getting." My voice was caught between a command and a sob. What an odd combination. Just then the Peace Keepers came in. They grabbed me, not Rick. "Don't let me down Rick! I'm counting on you!" I screamed to him as they hauled me to the train.

"I love you Mar!" He'd rushed after me. His form was blurry behind the tears. I don't know if it was from fear or sadness. In my head I sat, waiting. Shock. That's what it was, shock. I was lead into a large compartment. There Al was standing talking to the ' _Darling_ ' of the Capital. Fantastic.

"Mar, Finnick and Mags are going to be our mentors." Al stated turning around with a smile. A SMILE.

"You STUPID SELFISH SON OF A BITCH!" Each word was matched with a fist. Al was on the ground in all of 5 seconds. Soon large arms were wrapped around me. I grabbed the man and flipped him over onto the table. Al held he hands up.

"MAR! Listen to me!"

"NO YOU LISTEN TO ME GOD DAMMIT YOU KNOW WHAT IVE DONE TO KEEP YOU ALIVE! YOU KNOW WHAT IVE SACRIFICED TO KEEP YOU HERE! YOU WERE FREE AL! FREE FROM THOSE SPINLESS BASTARDS! YOU KNOW WHAT I'VE DONE FOR YOU AL!"

"I KNOW AND IT DIDN'T WORK!" he roared. The air left my lungs, we were face to face neither one backing down. I searched his eyes.

"You…. You _didn't_ take the medicine?"

"Mar"

"That's the **only** way it wouldn't work _Al_."

"Mar, listen."

"YOU KNOW WHAT I DID TO GET THE MONEY FOR THAT SHIT ALUS AND YOU DON'T EVEN USE IT!"

"IT. DIDN'T. WORK!" He roared. The volume of his voice overpowering my own. Al was always a gentle giant. My mind blanked at the ferocity of his voice. "I took that shit every day Mar. Just like I was supposed to. But it was too late. The damage was done."

"No…" I wonder if the world could hear the shatter. It rang in my ears. This isn't happening. "no the doctor said. He said you were doing better. Why would he lie about that?"

"I asked him to."

"What. No. that doesn't make sense." My foundation is cracking. The world started spinning.

"I stopped responding to the treatment 4 months ago Mar. I didn't tell anyone."

"You… No…"

"I was always going to volunteer."

"Why? Why would you leave them like this?!"

"I'm dying Mar. Wither it's at home watching you fight for your life, or fighting by your side… I'm going to die." A strangled sob left my throat. "I'd rather have my death mean something. I saved that kid. I bought him another year of safety." I started shaking. Anger, fear, sorrow, what was the difference anymore. Drowning in emotions. Is there a difference between up and down? It had been 6 years since I'd felt this cold. Frozen. No worse. There has to be something worse. This is so much worse. I don't know when I ended up on the floor in Al's arms. I don't know how much time passed while I had my break down. My older brother was dying. My older brother was dying.

"W-What a-about Rudd-ie?" the words were strangled and blended with each sob. "S-she al-allready lost K-Ke-ira. Y-ou you can't leave her t-too!" Al wrapped me up tighter.

"I'm going home Mar, I get to see Kira again. And my parents, I get to meet yours."

"n-n-no w-w-we ne-ne-need y-you!"

"I know that you will take care of Ari and the others. You are the strongest out of anyone in all of Four."

"No No I'm not! I'm not strong!" I felt like Ari looking up at his dark blue eyes as he looked down at me.

"Then figure out how to be! You need to be strong dammit!" His voice rose. "You always have! You do ANYTHING for them! Got that!"

"I always will." I managed to breathe out.

"I know… Its better us than them Mar. You know that."

"I know…" I swallowed the lump in my throat. His chest heaved at my back. Our breathing evened out. The world around me came back. We were on a gaudy over decorated train. Heading to the Capitol. And my brother is dying. Euripides was staring at us, mouth hung indignantly in shock. Finnick and Mag's eyes held pity. _I hate pity_. "Can I help you?!" roaring angrily at the three. This wasn't any of their fucking business. The powder puff looked shocked and offended. Oh he hadn't heard anything yet. A storm of emotions rose me to my feet. Fight or flight. But I'd never run. I'll take the hit because it's all I know how to do. Survive. It's all I know how to do. This overdressed disgusting blue man had no idea the struggles we face every day. Four is supposed to be a career District. We still struggle. There's still a canyon between the wealthy and the poor. A canyon that the victors get to leap over. Forgetting the ones they knew before. Fury built as I recount every injustice I've ever seen. Every loss. Every dream crushed. Every ounce of hope stolen. My feet moved me closer to the Capitolites. That's all the Victors were now. Choosing wealth over love. I was soon jerked back slamming into a familiar chest.

"Where's her room?" Al cut everyone off. Euripides started to cluck in his capital fashion. Not helping the situation man. Not helping. His words were high pitched and insulting. Fire. Storm. Lightning. Wind. Hatred. Unadulterated and unfounded hatred. All consuming rage. Staring daggers at the Captiol man as he led us down a hallway. It was only us because Al was practically carrying me from my shoulders. It was also the only thing keeping out escort alive. I'm usually able to turn it off. Find my light in the darkness. That's always Al or Ari. And Al is dying.

Al and I both walked into a huge room. He wrapped me up and we laid down. Like I used to with Kari. It made me shake. Not of rage. Despair. This always happens. Anger turns to sadness and depression. A side only Al got to see. A side I'd have to face alone soon.

"It's not appropriate for tributes to share their room." Euripides' voice cut through our peace. "You have to leave!"

"Make me." Was all that Al said. Clucking more the man slammed the door behind him. My walls dropping. I finally started to let go. Sobbing like I hadn't since the last day Kari walked this earth. Breaking with Al shattered right beside me. How am I supposed to be strong now? Ari. Ruddy. That's how. The others. I'm getting home to them. No matter what. But god, how?

It took a few hours before my tears stopped falling. Al had cried himself to sleep. I didn't have time to waste. Silently I crept out of my room. Searching for the living room. I needed a TV. Watching the previous games would be a good use of my time. I have to come home. As I entered each room the light automatically turned on. It caused me to jump. Almost out of my skin. Soon two people appeared. One an older woman with brown hair. Gray was peppering into the strands. She was done up in the trademark Capitol fashion. God that stuff had to be annoying. It was irritating just to look at. The boy who arrived with her was dressed the same. Black and white clothes. Blank faces. Why were they even here? It was unnerving. They just appear out of nowhere. I'd come her to watch the previous Games to study. Having no idea how to work this crap it was clear I needed help. I hate asking for help.

"Umm, hi." They were staring at me. Like the kids. Waiting for an order. God, I'm not that intimidating am I? Maybe it wasn't intimidation. Maybe it was contempt. That word caused my throat to close slightly. I still need to study. "Could you please gather tapes from the previous Games? I would like to start studying." They each left with a nod. Their eyes still boring into my brain. What was that emotion? What could I have done? Oh… right… I broke things. They probably had to clean up that mess. Minutes later they'd appeared with a box of videos as well as a pad of paper and pencil. "Oh thank you! I didn't think to ask for paper." They nodded again. No eye contact unless I grabbed theirs first. Ashamed? Disgusted? They don't look like Euripides. Pompous and feathered. More beaten down, home. Their eyes, they look like home. "I'm…uhh sorry for making that mess earlier… I uhh wasn't thinking clearly." They both looked at me like I had grown a second head. It was the most emotion they'd shown. I rose an eyebrow, confused as why they looked so confused. We stood surrounded by silence. Then it hit me. "No one talks to you do they?" I breathed out. Both shook their heads. Slight fear in their eyes. What kind of a life is that? Being ignored by everyone around you. My kind of lift that's what. "Will it get you in trouble if I talk to you?" They shook their heads again. The woman pointing at me. "It will get me in trouble?" They both nodded solemnly. "Why? that doesn't make sense." They both remained quiet. The older woman looking to the ground in slight despair. "Do you not know how to talk?" Who reaches adulthood without being able to speak? Is that why they are servants? They are too dumb to do anything? "Would you like to join me?" They looked at me like I was crazy. "I have 27 people waiting for me to get back home. My older brother is dying. I really need all the help I can get. And I hate asking for help. But the way I see it you guys know about the games and the Capital." They both shared a glance. Still no word. "Can either of you write?" They looked at me with horror again. Why is writing terrifying? What the hell is going on here? My gaze was expectant. Anger was brewing again. I hate being ignored. Their gazes were both on me of the floor. What the hell? "What, can't bother to speak to the poor tribute from District Four?!" The woman's eyes snapped up. She took a step forward. Placing two gentle hands on my shoulders, shaking her head violently. Eyes pleading that was not the cause of their silence. "I'd really appreciate an actual answer." The woman shrunk back. The younger man more so. Fear? Why are they afraid of me?! This is so frustrating. The woman's thin gloved hands reached forward grabbing the pad of paper I had. She started to write quickly. The script was neat. She had clearly been educated.

" _We can't speak."_

"What you don't know how?" The boy took a defiant step forward and opened his mouth. His tongue was missing… "What the hell?" the words hardly traveled past my lips. Jumping backwards in surprise of the gruesome sight.

" _It's our punishment, we are criminals. We do not belong in polite society."_ The woman scribbled down again. I let out an ugly snort. The kind that Rick would laugh at me about.

"Polite society is stupid. So would you two like to join me?" They both shared a worried glance. The boy curtly turned and left. The woman scribbled down another note.

' _He has only been here a few months.'_

"But do you know about the games?"

' _Yes, I've been an Avox for the games for several years.'_ Was her reply. I looked at her expectantly.

"What's an Avox?" Her eyes saddened again.

' _A captured enemy of the state who is forced to serve the Capitol for life.'_ More anger raged. What could she have possibly done? She seemed sweet and petit. I'm sure that's how the others saw me as well though. _'I'll help anyway I can.'_ Sending a grateful smile her way, my shoulders relaxed. Might as well start from the beginning. It was only 11 pm. I had at least 8 hours to kill.

"What's your name?" I asked realizing I'd been completely rude. She looked at me taken aback again. She scribbled down. ' _Marcella'_ I smiled at the name. "Cool we almost have the same name. I'm Marjorie. It's a pleasure to meet you Cella." There was a shocked and grateful look in her eye. Like she hadn't heard someone say her name in ages. What if she doesn't like that name? "Is it okay if I call you Cella?" she nodded quickly. A smile on her painted lips. I tried ignoring the confusing tears that had welled up in her eyes. This wasn't right, but is anything? "Well let's get this party started." Cella got up and popped in the first Hunger Games video. We were up to the 11th year and I was shaking with rage. All the carnage all the death. We were watching the tribute parade. Interviews everything. It was a fucking popularity contest. I wanted to puke. "Turn it off please." I stated coldly as a 12 year old girl was squired by a muscle bound boy from District Two. Cella did as asked and sat back down. I looked at her with teary eyes. "It's a glorified popularity contest isn't it?" I whispered. "Sponsors." She nodded sadly. "So I'm going to be an object for the capitol?" More tears were gathering. Cella nodded again. "Awesome…" my voice broke. Feeling her sad gaze on my frame I felt weak. Not in a demanding way. She simply wanted to help. And that alone made me want to assure this tongueless stranger that I'd be okay. Taking a deep breathe I started collecting myself. Brightening my voice I chirped "Well at least I know how to do that. I know how to sell myself." Cella's eyes screamed disbelief. I chuckled. "It's a shit thing for a 16 year old to know how to do. But trust me, I'm good at it." My tone turning bitter towards the end. I closed my eyes seeing flashes of the things that I've done. Bringing my knees to my chest I took a deep breath. Soon I felt a familiar hand ruffle my hair. I glared up at Al as he gave me his charming smile.

"Moooorning sunshine." He flopped down. "Studying?"

"Yeah, it's a glorified popularity contest."

"What?"

"The games. The people who win are the ones who are popular. We have to make them want us to live. Or hide till everyone else is dead."

"We're selling ourselves to the capitol. Pimping our past for sympathy in order to keep you alive?"

"Yup!" I stated popping the 'p' "great folks huh?" I stated sarcastically. "But we've got a lot to use."

"You've got this in the bag then."

"Fuck you." I snorted as he gave me a cocky smirk.

"No thanks, I'm not in to incest." Two can play at that Game Mr. Inees.

"That's not what you said last night." I murmured slyly. Leaning forward. He shook his head and frowned.

"See what I mean!"

"I don't know what you're talking about." answering in a sing song voice I stood for the first time in hours. Trying to encourage the blood circulation in my limbs.

"You're as bad as Kari was." He laughed. I stopped smiling then, stopped moving too. Just stopped. "Mar, I'm sorry."

"Come on we've got work to do." Voice was colder now, matching the icing of my heart. Nothing like dead relatives to kill any sort of joy I've managed to conjure up. Pain and loss are powerful motivators but powerful weaknesses as well. There will be enough death in the coming weeks. I don't need to think about past tragedies now. "We can agree she's off limits?"

"No Mar, I think Kari and Arianna are your two best selling points." Selling points. Using my dead sister and her daughter as selling points. How can he even utter those words? "As sick and twisted as it is, it's true. You'll get the men with your looks and the women with your strength and compassion. You've got your adopted _daughter_ to go home to. You made a promise. And."

"I always keep my promises." We murmured at the same time. I pushed my bangs out of my face. Frustrated. Al just had to be right. "It doesn't feel right."

"It isn't. But you _have_ to go home." We both took a shaky breath.

"You talk about Kari if you want to. I, I can't. That's like talking about Mom and Dad. I just…. I can't." I could feel my heart rate rising as memories danced before my eyes. Squeezing them shut I focused on my breathing. Memory lane is not somewhere I need to be. I need to be at home with Ari and the others. Making sure everyone has washed and eaten. It's got to be close to 7 now, how are they getting along..

"Sounds good." Al's firm hand clasping my shoulder brought me back. "Come on, let go see what food they've got around here. We haven't eaten in a day." Worrying is like a rocking chair. It gives you something to do, but doesn't get you anywhere. Focus Mar. Focus.

"Don't get used to this cushy crap." I scolded.

"Then why'd you let me sleep, hmm?" He smirked at me again. I narrowed my eyes. Cella lead us to the breakfast room.

"Thank you for your help Cella." I called before she could leave. She sent me a nod and a soft smile. Turning back to the feast that laid before us Al made a strangled noise.

" _You_ made a friend?" Al asked with disbelief. I rolled my eyes and sat down at the table. "…I think hell just froze over…" he muttered, sitting next to me. I ignored his cocky smirk and focused on spreading jelly on some weird bread like thing. Euripides walked in clucking angrily. He stopped the moment he saw us sitting at the table.

"Well, that explains why you weren't answering your doors." He mumbled grumpily. Shuffling his over polished self towards some kind of drink dispenser.

"Looks like this year's tributes are early risers Mags!" Finnick called as he entered the room. Mags made some kind of mumbling sound. It made him chuckle. Spending the next few weeks stuck with Finnick Odair was not ideal. Al saw me tense and nudged my side gently. I rolled my eyes. "You used to _hate_ waking up early Mar." Finnick stated as he sat across from me. Mar… like when we were kids. We aren't kids Odair. You left me… I gripped my knife a little tighter. Earning another nudge from Al.

"You haven't spoken to me in two _years_ Odair." Venom dripping from my voice. "You do not have the right to call me Mar anymore." The pregnant silence fueled the memories dancing behind my eyes. "Actually do us both a favor and don't speak to me at all." I slammed the knife and bread thing down before stalking out of the room. Nothing. For years. And he acts like we just spoke yesterday. Like I'm not being sent to fight for my life in an arena of death. Like he didn't break his promise….

Alnus's POV

Well she didn't hit him. That's a plus. She didn't eat anything either. I'd bring her leftovers after I finished. Euripides was beside himself.

"I have never encountered such a horrible girl!" his exclamation caused me to tense.

"You don't know a **damn** thing about Mar." I bit out. Managing to keep my voice level. " **None** of you do." I stated pointedly glaring at Finnick. He looked guilty but offended. Euripides started to cluck about how my language was inappropriate. I watched him go on. If the word 'damn' bothered him so much then he should probably stay away from me and Mar. Escort or not. "Sorry to offend your virgin ears." I drawled sarcastically. Grabbing my plate and some food for me and Mar I got up.

"Wait Alnus!" Finnick called.

"What Odair?"

"How's she been? How's… how's her family?"

"You know, the usual." I glanced over my shoulder. "Watched each member of her blood family die in her arms. Been beaten down, used, belittled and forced to do things no one should ever have to do. Nonstop for the last six years." Finnick's face paled. Good, maybe the bastard does have a heart. "Had her one ounce of hope for happiness ripped out by the boy who was supposed to be her best friend." That one hurt him. Good. "Still manages to get up and put the other kids first." With that I started towards Mar's room. Maybe that was a mistake. Insulting Finnick so blatantly. As he is supposed to help keep us alive. But, Mar's history with Finnick isn't great. He pretending everything was fine was a dick move. Dude's a pompous ass though so I'm not surprised. Grunting could be heard from down the hall. Growing louder as I reached Mar's room. Door was slammed open and the room itself was a disaster zone. She'd flipped her mattress, gotten it pushed up against the wall somehow. Currently pounding it with no remorse. That's gonna leave rug burn marks on her knuckles.

"Breaking it in are you?" Her breathing was ragged. Rage permeating from the 5' 3" girl. "You know I thought it was soft enough." Her glare could be felt from across the room. I did turn to acknowledge her rage. My expression echoed back anger, and exhaustion. Among other things. "Eat." It feels weird telling her what to do. Her grumbling grew closer to the table. She damn near broke the chair with the way she yanked it away from the table. Her gaze was fixed on the dark wood grain as she bit furiously into her food. Every chew was out of anger. We sat in silence. It's the best thing to do when she's like this. Just wait till the storm has passed. Her grunting quieted, watching her out of the corner of my eye, still keeping the same position, figure now's as good as any time to test the waters. "That's your thinking face." I muttered. "You got a plan?" My body faced hers slowly, she had my full attention. After a pause she nodded. "Then let's get to work."

We'd been at it for hours when a knock broke our concentration. Papers and sketches littered the table. The door opened and Euripides poked his head in.

"Lunch is ready." He stated after surveying the room. I nodded, gathering up the papers.

"We don't need those to eat." Mar snipped.

"I want to show them to our mentors to see their opinions." Mar scoffed angrily. "I'll do the talking _sunshine_." She was still grumbling under her breath. Everyone looked surprised to see that we'd showed up. Mar sat down in the same chair as breakfast. Ignoring everyone around her. I sat down clearing my throat. "We drew these up." I handed the papers over to Mags. "I'd like your opinions." Mags nodded. Mar kept surprisingly quiet. Mags was mumbling incoherent words. Euripides got up and stood behind Mags and Finnick.

"These are costume designs!" he shrieked in shock. Mar jumped, she looked at our escort with a raised brow.

" _Yes_ they are." His pale blue skin turned purple.

"Who knew your brain could still function after all that crap you're covered with." Mar mumbled. Just quiet enough for me to hear. She was trying to hold back. But if she can't shut her mouth, then she whispers.

"How DARE you!" the newly colored man roared. I didn't listen to his rant. I know for sure Mar wasn't listening. He stopped to breathe for a moment.

"Have you finished your tantrum?" Mar asked, popping another little berry in her mouth. I couldn't help but smirk. That got the powder puff riled up again.

"Euripides calm down." Finnick soothed. He turned to look between Mar and I. "These are really good."

"I'm aware." Mar quipped. Finnick scowled. "Look, no disrespect to whatever fluffy fru fru person was going to dress us up, but this is MY life on the line here. The parade is our first exposer. First impression. And I will not go out there dressed like… that" Mar gestured towards Euripides lip curled in disgust."

"I'll have you know that this is the latest fashion from the cap" Thank god Finnick interrupted the purple faced man before he got started again.

"You've got a plan already?"

"Yeah, it's a popularity contest. So we have to make them like me. Sell our stories. It's fucking _sick_. But I made a promise. I _always_ keep my promises."

"I can think of a few you didn't"

"Back at you Capitol _Darling_." The air started getting tense I knew Mar was getting pissed. I wrapped my arm around her and pulled her in close.

"Mar, just breath okay. Breath." She nodded taking deep breathes. I looked up at Odair and he looked pissed. That's interesting. Mags started babbling. "What do you think?" She nodded with a smile and gave a thumbs up.

"What's your plan?" Finnick bites out.

"Kiss enough Capitol ass to get home." Mar grumbled. Finnick wasn't impressed. Mags looked amused.

"We're going to play up our personal strengths. Mar's is that she is a survivor. Nothing keeps her down. She only stays down if that's where she _wants_ to be." Finnick's gaze moved from Mar to me.

"And yours?"

"I'm the protective older brother. Willing to do _anything_ to get my sister home. So she can take care of my girlfriend and our baby…" The compartment dropped to silence.

"She told you then?" Mar's voice was soft.

"Yeah." I bit out. "I'll never get to hold my kid. Fantastic right?"

"The odds are never in our favor." The distance in her voice almost reached home. It was true. The near silent hum of the train was the only sound taking up the space

"We'll be in the capitol in an hour. I'll give these to your stylists." Finnick broke the quiet.

I nodded in reply "Thanks."

"I want to meet with them first." Mar piped up. "They need to know what we are going for."

"And what is that?" Euripides asked with venom in his voice.

"We. Are. Survivors." Mar enunciated every word. "And the others don't stand a chance."

"You don't know what you're talking about. You've never taken a life before." Finnick's voice was cold and angry. Mar met Finnick's gaze with fire and anger in her emerald eyes.

"Yes, I have."

Mar's POV

The shock on their faces was expected. The disbelief too. Then as the idea settled Euripides started to look at me like I was a monster. He didn't know why. No one did. Not even Al. I felt strong arms pull me up, leading out of the room towards the back of the train. I took a seat watching as the world whipped by. Al didn't sit. It was a while before he spoke.

"Are you ever going to tell me what happened?"

"No." My voice was flat and cold. "I'm a killer. End. Of. Story." A large sigh left his mouth as he flopped on the couch. I didn't glance his way I just watched the world pass us by.

"You always have a reason for everything you do Mar. You are not a killer." I was in his face in an instant.

"Everyone is a killer if they choose to be. It was my choice."

"And you had a reason Mar, you always do!"

"So what?"

"What was it Mar? Huh? I'm dying, you can't even tell me the truth?"

"The truth is an ugly thing." I breathed. "It isn't good enough. We deserve better than the truth. Better than this reality."

"Mar," Al grabbed my face. It had been 6 months and I still remember it like it was yesterday. "What happened?" My eyes were tearing up. I shook my head. I didn't want to tell him.

"I can't you'll hate me."

"Mar, I'll never hate you. Please tell me. Please." His eyes were begging me to tell him the truth. I don't know why I finally broke but I did.

"Do you remember the attacks that had been happening to the girls? About 8 months ago?" I started after a deep breath. "After the sunset? How they would come home bruised and beaten, or just wouldn't come home." He nodded gently, coaxing me to continue. "You remember that creep Cetus?"

"Yeah I remember that punk. He sailed his boat off and was never seen again."

"He didn't sail shit. I rigged the boat." Confusion settled in his eyes. Waiting. I didn't want to give. It was my burden to bare.

"Mar, just tell me what happened." I took a deep breathe trying to keep the tears from forming in my eyes.

"He tried to rape Cory." My voice was above a whisper. "She was late for dinner. I'd gone looking for her. It had been a long night already. I was worn to pieces from the job I'd just finished." I tried forcing the bile back into my stomach thinking about all of the jobs I had to perform at home. "I'd rounded a corner and there they were." Voice shaking and uneven "He was on top of her. Ripping her clothes to shreds. Hitting her non-stop." Tears were prickling in my eyes. Meeting Al's gaze for the first time I continued with desperation. "Her eyes were rolled into the back of her head. I… thought he had killed her." The fear I felt at that moment surging back. It choked me again. "I rushed forward in an instant. Not thinking. Because thinking is for smart people and I am _not_ smart." With a bitter chuckle I tore my gaze from Al and back to the world that was whipping by. "Tore that big bastard off of her. Screaming for her to run. He'd just beaten her he hadn't…" I already started the story. Shuttered and faster breaths started to leave my lungs at the thought. "Hadn't gotten to anything else… yet." Poor sweet Cory having to have her innocence stolen like that. She had been so close to losing her innocence. And her life. "She managed to get up. I honestly don't know how, her head was bleeding. All I could do was hold him off until she got out of sight. Praying she didn't die before she got home."

"He was 6' 2" and at least 200 pounds Mar." Al's voice was thick with disbelief.

"I know…" another strangled chuckle passed my quivering lips "He kicked the shit out of me. Tried raping me too. He… was hard and pissed that his 'conquest' had gotten away. He wanted 'new meat' not some tired whore." Behind my eyes I could see the smug bastard. Feel every hit, every rip of my hair. He tore it out in chunks. "He went on like that for a while. Managed to shove his tongue in my mouth. Usual dominance thing." Glancing at Al it was clear he was put off by my sudden apathetic tone. It was true though. "That turned into the biggest mistake of his life." You started the story now finish it. Darkness the one I shove into the pit of my stomach as far away from the world as I can. It flourished at the memory. "I bit it off. Blood poured out of his mouth, and mine. I had his tongue in my mouth. He let go of my hands screaming bloody murder. It was this animalistic sound. I can still hear it ringing in my head when it gets too quiet…" I could hear it now… Finish the story Mar. With a shake of my head I kept going. "I spit his tongue out. Looking up at him. And He was pissed. The blood in his mouth did nothing to stall the rage in his eyes. They screamed everything. He was going to kill me. Rape wasn't enough anymore. And all I could think was I can't die. In seconds I'd snapped his neck." My shoulders started to shake violently with each passing second. I looked to my brother, finally allowing the tears to fall. "It was easier than opening an oyster Al…. it was disgustingly easy…. I didn't even have to try." A sob or maybe a gasp passed Al's lips. Maybe? I was there again. In the rain. "And then I'm covered in his blood and he's dead. We were still in the slums so no one cared really but if some Peace Keeper came by on patrol I'd be shot on sight." My speech picking up pace as I continued. "We were close to an old dock though. And there was a little row boat. I started dragging his body towards it as it started to rain. I don't remember much after that. Just the rain cutting into my skin. Washing away the blood. Then the pain of my arms as I rowed out to sea. How I gasped for breath with every stroke I took as I swam inland. I was maybe a mile or two off shore. I'd gotten the shit kicked out of me, I was tired, there had to be at least a few broken bones. But… um yeah I shoved the boat towards the sea and then swam back to shore. Laid on the beach crying for a bit. Then got myself together and came home. I went swimming a lot after jobs, so no one really noticed. Cory didn't know either. I told her I threatened to kill him. Not that I actually _had_. But on the plus side he'd never hurt anyone like that ever again. On the bad side… I've been reliving that night constantly for the last 6 months and the guilt is eating me alive."

"I told you that you always have a reason."

"That's what you say? I tell you how I _murdered_ a guy and that's what you say?"

Finnick's POV

I'd followed them to the end of the train. Standing in the door way the entire time. They didn't even look up. Tears were pouring down my face. She didn't deserve this. She. She was like me. I was supposed to be protecting her by staying away, and I left her on her own. I, how could I be so stupid! Why didn't I look for her after the fire?! Huh?! Why?! She's needed me for years. Then… at my reaping, our first kiss. My first kiss. And it was with my best friend as she begged me to come back to her. But I never did. I broke that promise…. I knew that. I've known that for years, but seeing the damage it did, hit all the harder.

"What else am I supposed to say Mar? The bastard got what he deserved! You did the right thing!"

"It doesn't feel right! I shouldn't have to kill to keep my loved ones safe. I shouldn't have to be treated like trash and beg to try and stay alive… I …. I… I shouldn't ne..need to sl..eep with disgusting men in order to keep food on the t..table!" I couldn't hold back the chocked sob that escaped my lips as I took in what she had become. I could have been helping her this whole time. She wasn't better off… They both snapped their heads in my direction. Tears adorning their faces as well.

"I don't need you judging me Odair. But hey, at least now you know you were right to drop me like a piece of trash. Cause that's all I've amounted to. But you wouldn't know anything about that would you?" Her voice was filled with venom as she shoved past me. More tears left my face.

"I understand more than you know…" I breathed out. Grabbing the door frame as the reality hit me full force.

"How could you possibly understand Odair? You've never gone hungry a day in your life." I swallowed hard looking Al straight in the eyes. Something in them changed. It was like he could read my thoughts. It was honestly scary. He looked confused. But something in my eyes told him I was telling the truth. The older man clapped my shoulder with a gentle squeeze and walked past. The weight on my shoulders just increased tenfold. The car door closed and I was alone with my thoughts. My knees finally buckled as my sobs echoed off the glass walls.

Eventually I ran myself dry. I needed to talk to her. To hold her and beg for forgiveness. I'd let my best friend down in the worst way. I had to tell her the truth. That I was protecting her. She'd probably scream in my face about how it was none of my business. But I, had to try. I sat in front of her door knocking for a solid 10 minutes. I rested my forehead waiting for another 5. I finally gave up and headed to the bar car for a drink. I'd curbed my drinking habit a bit. Gotten it under control. But I still had a glass or six on a bad day. The train was always stocked with my favorite liquors. I grabbed the bottle of whisky. Looked at a glass, reaching out to pick it up, but deciding against it. I didn't want to count the glasses today anyway. Then the tunnel to the capitol appeared… I had to put my mask back on. I checked my eyes in the mirror, they were puffy and bloodshot. I went to my room breaking out my kit. Within minutes I was picture perfect. Taking a deep breath I walked out of my room. Hearing the others in the main car I headed that way. Mentally preparing for what was to come.

Mar's POV

Euripides had spent the last 10 minutes scolding Al and I for crying. 'You'll make a bad impression which will reflect poorly on me.' Tittering about how he 'thought we were supposed to be strong.' If I wasn't so exhausted I would have strangled him here and now. Finally he sighed and shoved us towards the windows.

"Smile, wave!" I looked over to Al. His face looked tired too. He gave me a shake of his head. We were sticking to the plan.

"Alright guys! This is it! Time to make a good impression!" Finnick's cheery voice was the exact opposite of how he'd sounded 45 minutes ago. I just glanced at him out of the corner of my eye. Nose curling in utter disgust. The train came to a halt and he gave us his capitol smile. "Show time." Finnick was the first one out. Al looked at me.

" _Show_ time." His voice held more malice, it almost matched what was growing in my heart. I nodded shortly. Al went out first. Turning to help me off of the steps. Already treating me like I was a princess. We stood tall walking hand in hand. Flinching when a camera flashed too close. Our faces remained blank as we observed the Capitol crowd. They looked ridiculous. Shouting and waving obscenely. We didn't smile as they called our names. Or grin as they threw flowers. Our faces stayed collected. According to the plan. I wanted to scream, to flip them off. To tell them exactly what I thought of the Capitol and their Games. But now is not the time.

The training center was almost silent. To the point where my ears began ringing in the much desired quiet.

"I called ahead and told your stylist you'd like to meet with them. I'll lead you to them, then I have to attend to some business. But I'll see you at the parade." His gaze stayed on me longer than Al. He nodded for me. I still felt numb. I always do after reliving the past. Two Capitol people were waiting on a bench talking calmly. We approached them and the male instantly jumped up. His puffy pants and wig jolting at the movement.

"Finnick darling! It's so good to see your beautiful face again! You're just a bright ray of sunshine lighting up this dreary day." I raised my eye brow at the man's obvious flirting. Finnick returned the compliments. Voice smooth a silk.

"One of the best parts of the Games is coming to work with you two brilliant designers. I hope you don't mind this little favor?"

"Oh no, anything for you Finnick."

"So Finnick, are these our tributes?" The woman looked colder. Harder. I liked her already. She was wearing actual pants. Not some ridiculous get up that looked like she was a balloon. Her sweater was still sleek. I could tell that she was no nonsense kind of a person.

"Yes.." Before he could turn to introduce us my favorite blue poof blocked our view.

"Oh Finnick, I know you have a lot of work to get done. I'll handle the tributes and get everything squared away." He's shoving us away with more force than I'd imagine.

"I wanted to talk to them."

"Oh, Don't worry dear, I'll take care of it." Euripides voice was so sweet it made my teeth rot. He shoved us away from the stylists and Mags. My prep team looked me over quickly getting to work. After a good 3 layers of my skin had been removed the green haired one started clucking about all of my scars.

"So many imperfections." That pissed me off. "Here we've got something that will get rid of those ugly scars."

"No." My voice was firm, it was the first time that I had spoken in their presence. They all looked terrified at my voice. I was glaring at them with every ounce of hatred I could muster.

"No one in the capitol is going to like these nasty scars."

"I don't care about what the capitol likes. These scars prove something important."

"That you don't care about your appearance?" The short yellow one quaffed.

"No." I paused standing angrily. "That I'm a _survivor_." No one moved for a few minutes. I dared any of them to try anything. The oldest finally clapped her hands.

"We're wasting time. Come on we've still got work to do." I glared at her. "The scars will stay little _survivor_." She had a gentle gleam in her eyes. I nodded and sat back down. I was soon lathered in more products then I ever thought would exist. The three started to chirp about Capitol gossip.

"Have you seen Finnick yet this year?"

"Not yet." The short yellow one wined.

"I know he is the sexiest thing to ever grace this earth." The pink one chirped.

"Those eyes?!"

"And his abs! Ugh, what I wouldn't give to spend an evening with that man." The pink one groaned in desire.

"He's sixteen." My voice cut through the fumes and their petty chatter. My icy glare meeting every shocked face. "He's not a man. He's sixteen years old. Besides, how old are you, 35?!" With a scoff she moved forwards

"I am 30 years young thank you! But I woul-"

"So you could have a son that would be Finnick's age. Would you want to fuck him too?" Usually my anger boiled my blood. But this? It was a cold and biting fury. Anger was building on her over processed face as well.

"No I couldn't because I have class and am not a whore." I snorted at that.

"No just a pedophile." At that the short yellow one and the pink one yanked me out of the tub. Dried me off with the itchiest towel I'd ever felt. Soon I was lathered in hot sticky goop. They applied it thickly. The yellow and pink one grinning viciously. No chatter was made. Did they expect me to cry out in pain? My life is pain. This, this is nothing. At least I'd let them think that. They weren't going to win.

An hour later they stopped that assault. My skin was red and blotchy as they lathered me in a very pungent oil. My skin looked perfect, but it burned like a son of a bitch. The yellow and pink devils smiled at me widely. I'd managed to only wince slightly when the pain was extreme. The next shoved me into a chair and started to cut my hair. One went to work on my teeth and nails. Beyond the blinding bright light above my head I could see two of the three smile wider at my wincing. They were yanking my hair. Stabbing my gums, and cutting into my nails. I don't know how long this went on. I was too busy trying not to jump out of the fucking chair and strangle them.

"Uh oh! Time to go!" The pink one clapped. "Aralia is waiting." The older one glanced at the clock.

"If you two had actually done your jobs we would have finished everything." The pink one shrugged.

"Who cares? She'll be dead soon anyway." There's that hot burning rage. I stood from the chair bumping the pink one.

"When I win, you will regret this." I said in the deadliest voice I could imagine. There was a door where I assumed this Aralia was. Without direction I barged in, still very naked. My anger distracting me from any embarrassment I should be feeling. Honestly, 4 more people seeing me naked was not the end of the world. The woman from earlier had been sitting in a chair, she looked up at me in horror as I walked forward.

"What were they drunk?!" she started tutting whilst circling me like a very unhappy vulcher.

"No i pissed the pink one off." She stopped, barely visible in my peripheral vision.

"You're supposed to be trying to make people like you." A shake of her head followed her comment. That's rich.

"I don't want pedophiles to like me. Thank you." Sass dripping from every word. She moved in front of me more, a surprised smirk dancing on her lips.

"You don't have much of a filter do you?" I shrugged, indifferent to the whole thing. The pink one's comment pissed me off, but it also gave me a great angle to play. And man am I good at playing angles.

"I figure, I'm probably going to be dead in two weeks, might as well have fun while i can" Aralia turned her back to me gathering a few things.

"Or you could be nice and not be killed." Her voice was light, but also held an amount of superiority that I was not going to tolerate.

"Me being nice doesn't guarantee a win. It might help. Sure. But nothing's guaranteed. Not in the games. If I'm going to die soon, i want to have as much fun as possible." My stare hardened through my speech. She was put off. Good, these people are unbelievable. But, business is business. "Now let me see the dress"

"Excuse me?" It came out as more of a demand. One she wasn't expecting clearly. But I'm having a hard day.

"What you haven't started anything yet?" my shock and disbelief are soon replaced with excitement. "Great! I can tell you what I want then."

"Excuse me?!" Outrage, mmm might have gone too far with that one. Her eyes were furrowing, a snarl starting to form. Time to defuse the time bomb! The guilt card is my least favorite one to play. But they clearly think I'm below them. Calling them out on it can go one of two ways. They want to prove me wrong and help me. Or they admit they hate me and then I'm screwed.

"I'm going to die in 7 days, let me have my fun! It's a dying wish to a poor orphan from District Four. Are you really that cold?" Guilt flashed in her eyes. Thank god. I cannot deal with more torture. She grabs a bag and unzips it. Inside is the most beautiful dress I've ever seen. It shines like the ocean on a bright sunny day. I don't even touch it, in fear of ruining its beauty.

"It's so beautiful…" I managed to breathe out. She smiled gently at my awe. But this isn't going to work. "Do you have anything else?" glancing back at the perfect dress "This isn't going to work."

"What?!" her pride turns to anger quick.

"It's too beautiful. This. This belongs on a princess or something. In that I'd look like a sea goddess."

"That was my plan." She bit out, angry but confused.

"It's not going to work though. We are 2 poor wayward orphans who washed up in the Capitol from District four. It's just... too beautiful. Wrong feel. Save it for a tribute you actually like, yeah?" Her jaw dropped as she just gaped at me openly. A few minutes passed of her just staring at me. "So, do you not have anything else… or?"

"What do you want?" it wasn't a snap, but her voice wasn't pleased either.

"Canvas, netting, hooks, shells. I asked the powder puff to give you the pictures, i assume he didn't." demon powder puff

"You drew designs?" Something new was mixing in with her voice. I'm not sure what.

"Yeah, no offense to you or anything. But this is my moment. If I die i want my kids to look back and still see the me they love. Ya know?" She turned from putting the dress away and gapped openly again.

"You...you have kids?

"23." I paused. "Oh, 24 soon! I almost forgot." Her jaw was almost on the floor. "Why are you looking at me like that? The other orphans. What is compassion really that rare here? Such a sad place." I started to ramble a bit, midsentence my stylist just leaves. Smacking my hand to my forehead a groan of frustration rumbles out. The insults just slip out. And keep coming. This place is crazy! It's getting impossible to keep biting my tongue. I'll bite it off if I'm not careful. Aralia walks back in with a lump of canvas in her hands. It's a poorly constructed dress. A giant smile blooms on my face. "That's what I'm talking about!" Avox's soon follow with more fabric, shells, hooks, rope and netting. "Oh rope! Great thinking! How could I forget honestly?" The pile of poorly constructed canvas actually fits well. Aralia was standing back. The Avox's stood waiting for instruction.

Aralia's POV

"Cool, okay, um, rope first. The thick one? Great. Can you tie that around my waist? Right under my boobs. Wait! Give me some netting first. Yeah, great idea! Drape it over the rope then tie it. We can secure it with hooks. Cool! Can someone bring me scissors?" This tribute continued on, she was polite and sweet. Thanking the Avox's as they assisted her. I want to see what she comes up with. I'd been trying for a similar angle but had given up. Nothing I'd made looked right. The sea goddess look was old and over used, but the dress was beautiful. The awe that had shown on her face meant she clearly agreed. Seeing her interacting with the Avox's, it astounded me. The dress started to take form, there was a piece of netting and canvas that needed to be attached.

"Let me help." I brought over needle and thread. I kept quiet as she ripped and tore away parts of the dress, only to replace it with netting or frayed fabric. She looked… beautiful.

"Could you please tie some of this rope and seaweed into my hair?" She directed everyone with precision. But most of all genuine kindness. It was a rare sight in the Capitol.

"I'm going to step out for a bit." The girl didn't pay attention, but I didn't expect her to. I needed to have a talk with Euripides. An Avox was standing near a door waiting. "Please find Euripides and bring him here." With a silent nod the Avox went on its way. Ten minutes later the puffy blue escort flitted this way.

"Is she giving you trouble?" His voice was not chipper in any way. My steely resolve didn't change. I was not fond of the man. But we have to work together.

"May I have the designs she asked you to give her." His composer slipped for a second before he regained himself. "You threw them out didn't you?"

"Excuse me, but I was helping you. That trashy little witch doesn't stand a chance. Why tarnish your good name with her abomination." A smirk played on my lips.

"Abomination, huh? She's still getting the dress together. We'll just have to wait and see." His eyes bulged as I turned back into the prep room. I like her so much more now. Now that's motivation to rub into that jerks smug pudgy face. I'd been working on a special fabric. I hadn't completed it yet, this will either be a disaster or a miracle. We'll have to see. "Drape this around you." I instructed. She looked up. Her hair was mess and rugged. Her scars shown clearly on her skin despite the tan. She was right, it was a good look. This is going to be perfect. "Come on, I'm your stylist, you're supposed to trust me." She gave an undignified snort but allowed me to drape the fabric around her. She only needed a little make up, around her eyes. So highlight the storm that hid beneath the pale green orbs. A light amount of glitter was placed in all the right places. She'd just come out of the sea. Washed up on the Capitol shore. Standing back and admiring our work I couldn't help my smile. "You've got a great eye for design. You ready to take the Capitol by storm?" She nodded. "Good, cause we're late. Here are your shoes, no time to argue."

Mar's POV

Heels, great! Wait what do I look like? I didn't have time to ask because she was dragging me out the door, down the hall. Looking down I noticed that as the fabric ruffled the white turned slightly gray. I stopped and started to shake the skirt. "We. Are. Late!" She whispered in my ear before she pushed me out the door. I was standing in a courtyard. There were 12 chariots lined up. I looked around for Al and saw him standing next to Finnick who was speaking with someone else. They weren't in costume so I assumed they were a mentor. The skirt wasn't too long, there was some netting that trailed behind me. From what I could see I looked like I wanted clicking of my heels drew attention towards me. Everyone appeared to have already arrived. I was just focusing on keeping my face straight and getting to Al without falling over. These heels are a creation of the devil.

Al saw me first. He was mid-sentence when he broke into a shit eating grin. He met me half way.

"Thank you." I breathed softly. "These shoes are going to kill me." He was smiling so wide. His eyes full of pride and admiration.

"You look so beautiful." His voice was gentle.

"Are you sure it's really me, because I think they gave me a body transplant when I wasn't looking." I murmured to him. Al took my arm with a chuckle leading me towards Mags and Finnick. I noticed how quiet the area had gotten. Al and I looked around and everyone's eyes were on us. All of the guys were drooling. It made my skin crawl. I gripped Al's arm tighter.

"They touch you and I'll kill them." He murmured in my ear.

"They touch me and you won't get the chance." I countered back. Sharing a smirk we reached Finnick and Mags. Finnick's jaw was still hanging on the floor. I raised an eyebrow at him. Al cleared his throat. That seemed to slightly snap him from his daze. It was amusing to see him so flustered. Al stood next to me puffing with pride, while daring anyone to say anything to me with his glare. Moments later the two stylists came bounding over with a parcel in their hands.

"Up." Aralia commanded. Moments later the announcement came over the speaker requesting all tributes mount their chariots. Aralia and the guy were both grinning like mad men. They each draped a thin cape over Al and I. They clipped into cuffs that rested on our wrists. Aralia stood back.

"Damn we're good." Was all that the guy stated.

"Go blow them away." Aralia smirked. Finnick hadn't said anything. Mags came over patting our hands lightly with a large toothless smile. I gave her a soft smile back. Rolling my shoulders I got ready for the show.

"Remember the game plan?"

"No smiling."

"No laughing."

"We aren't here to play."

"We're here to blow them away." Just as Al finished the chariot lurched forward. We grabbed hands and stood tall. The sound of the crowds was deafening. It only continued to grow as we moved along. I glanced at a screen only to see it was focused on us. Our capes flew behind us. Looking just like storm clouds, flashes of lightning could even be seen. My dress was a rush of tormented waves mixing with an angry sky. The guy was right. Damn they were good. And I, I was beautiful. I looked at Al smirking, he returned the gesture. My joy was short lived. We grew closer to the Capitol building. Occupied by our President. Cornelius Snow. My face hardened in and instant. My grip tightening on Al's hand. I felt him glance at me, but kept my eyes forward and face cold.

"Welcome, and Happy Hunger games!" Snow's voice boomed over the area. "We are glad to welcome you brave tributes to the capitol! May the odds be ever in your favor." His voice made my skin crawl. Our eyes met for a moment. Before the chariot jerked forward towards the living quarters. Al hopped down first, helping me down to the ground. I gave him a grateful smile. I felt everyone's glares on us as we sauntered towards the elevator, they only cause a smirk to once again play on my lips.

"That was AMAZING!" Aralia squealed in absolute excitement. It seemed way out of character for her. She took my other arm and began to help me towards the lift. "You my dear could be the next big thing." She laughed happily the male stylist tittered on about how popular we were going to be now. I muttered softly.

"I don't want to be the next big thing. I want to go home." Al gave my arm a squeeze.

"Well my dear. That entrance gave you a huge leap closer." Aralia exclaimed.

"Aralia, how did you manage to make her dress? She's in rags and is no doubt the loveliest tribute here!" The male stylist quipped

"That was all her. I just helped here and there." His jaw dropped

"You defiantly blew them away." Finnick commented with a soft smile. I nodded in thanks. Soon we were on the fourth floor. It was gaudy and over decorated, of course. All I really wanted was to take these damn shoes off. Euripides started a tour and I waved him off. Kicking the demon heels off with distaste.

"I know they are big on torture here, but shit." I muttered collapsing onto one of the couches. Al laughed at me. I gave him a warning glare. He raised his hands in defense.

"Need a foot rub?" Finnick commented. "I could arrange one." I raised my eyebrows in horror and disgust.

"No, that's weird. Don't touch my feet. Don't touch me at all." I snapped. Al gave me a sharp elbow. "OW!"

"He was just being nice." Al whisper yelled at me.

"I don't care he doesn't get to touch my feet. That's weird!"

"I give Ruddy foot massages all the time."

"Yeah you are also her amazing loving boyfriend. _That's_ different."

"Your feet hurt, he's trying to help." Al smirked. "Besides he probably meant a masseuse or something."

"What the hell is that?"

"They give you massages."

"Ew, no I don't want some stranger touching me!"

"Do you want me to give you a foot rub?"

"No you weirdo." Al soon shifted and started reaching towards my feet.

"Stop whining it will help."

"Gah! Why does everyone want to touch my feet!?" I exclaimed loudly. Bolting up I huffed out of the room. Dress trailing behind me. I could hear Al laughing as I stormed away. Mental note: steal all of his blankets.

Finnick's POV

She was so cute when she was flustered. Al eventually stopped laughing. A genuine smile on his face. He seemed at peace. Like the games didn't exist and he wasn't going to enter his death in less than a week. "Well if you'll excuse me. I'm going to go wash this stuff off." He smiled at everyone then headed towards his room as well.

"That's a rare smile Odair." Aralia smirked my way. Both she and Mags giving a knowing look. Mags knew how much I missed Mar. I was her sharkfin and she was my marmaid. It feels like centuries ago. I had to keep my distance to keep her out of danger. But here she was anyway. I should have never pushed her away. I should have ran into her arms the second I got back. My smile dropped. There was a knock on the door. An Axox answered, soon returning and handing me a letter. Every shred of happiness left my body as I saw the writing. I silently walked to my room to get ready. I wanted to cry. I would probably get drunk later. I'd wanted to on the train; that desire just multiplied. I was walking towards my room, I heard Mar and Al talking in hers.

"You hurt his feelings Mar."

"Shut up Al."

"He still cares about you. He looks at you like you are the most precious thing on this earth."

"Shut up Al." Her voice was monotone.

"Mar, maybe he had a reason, you never gave him a chance to explain."

"I don't want to hear it Al." Her voice was cracking.

"Mar, everyone who knows you knows how much you miss him. Just, talk to him."

"JUST SHUT THE HELL UP AL!" she screamed. There was a slap that could be heard. There was heavy breathing. "You know why he didn't come around after my parents died? Because orphans are _trash_. You know… you _know_ what I've had to do Al. I've been _fucked_ by half of the men in Four. I am a _whore_."

"Mar you had no cho"

"There is _always_ a choice Al!"

"Marjorie Louise Scur! You have sacrificed EVERYTHING you've ever had to help others. Do this _one_ thing for yourself."

"No…" her voice was so broken. "Who is ever going to want a _whore_ Al? Huh? Why the hell would Finnick EVER want me again? I'm not that girl. The one he knew. If he'd want any part of me it would be her. I will never be that way again and I'd disappoint him _constantly_. I. I can't handle that Al. You said it yourself I sacrifice _everything_ I have to help others. I don't want to have him Al. Because I'll lose him. Like _everything_ else." My heart broke. I wanted to storm in the room and scream 'I want you!' tell her over and over again how beautiful she is, how strong. How we were _exactly_ the same. What was waiting for her when she got out of the arena. A gentle hand touched my shoulder and I jumped. Mags looked up at me with sad eyes. She gave me a gentle squeeze. "I _have_ the games to win Al." Her voice was shaking with emotion. "I'm losing you, I'm going into an arena where 22 other people are going to try and kill me violently. I have to suck up to the fucking capitol in order to keep myself alive… I… I can't have a distraction Al. I need to focus."

"He could be your strength."

"I have Ari and Ruddy to get back to and protect."

"You wouldn't need to protect him Mar, he's _Finnick_ _Odair_."

"I'm saving us both from disappointment. It's better this way Al."

"You're lying to yourself."

"Then for the _love of god_ lie to me as well." She choked out a sob. Mags squeezed my shoulder again. Tears in her eyes as well. I had to go… I had to go be everything I hate. With a deep breath I pushed everything down. _'It's show time'_

Mar's POV

Al wrapped his arms around me and I broke down again. I have so many people to protect and no matter what I do it seems I let them down or I succeed but become even more of a monster. He let me cry into his chest for who knows how long. Eventually dinner came around. I wasn't hungry. I told him to go without me. Luckily he actually listened. After ten minutes the walls started closing in around me and I felt like I was standing on the edge of this huge cavern and no one was there to pull me back. I had to get out of there before my thoughts got worse. I entered the dining car to see Finnick was missing. The mood was somber. Al looked up at me with a small smile. I sat down and started to nibble on some bread.

"Finnick had… _business_ to attend to. The life of a victor and all that…" Euripides managed to choke out. The words were most defiantly forced. Mags had a faraway look in her eyes. This wasn't good business, whatever he was doing. ' _Could it be?_ ' No, he's a victor. He's Finnick Odair. Probably shacking up with some hot piece of Capitol ass. The thought made my stomach drop. Why the hell do I care? ' _Because you still love him stupid._ ' The voice in the back of my head stated. We were just kids, what the hell did we know about love? We didn't know a thing about the world then. I can't love him. What's love anyway? It's not worth the pain.

After a silent and sad dinner everyone when off on their own. Finnick hadn't returned yet. As pissed as I am at him for pretending everything is fine between us, I was starting to worry. It was going on 1 am. We had training the next day and I should have been sleeping. But something told me sitting in the living room waiting for him to come back is where I needed to be. He managed to stumble in around 2. The lights came on and he didn't seem to realize he wasn't alone. His hair was a mess and his shirt was ripped, a few buttons missing. His eyes were red and his movements stiff. My stomach dropped and I knew. A sob escaped my lips. His eyes snapped to mine. Showing nothing by regret and remorse.

"W-what are you doing up?" He managed, his voice was on edge, and rougher than it had been. Despair. Self-loathing. Heart-break. In seconds I crossed the room wrapping him up in a firm hug. Crying onto his shoulder.

"You don't deserve this. You're actually _worth_ something." I mumbled over and over again. He pushed me away.

"Don't touch me." His voice was cold but empty.

"How long Finn?" My voice was breaking with despair and pain. If I thought I'd hurt before, this it was too much. He was a victor for Christ sakes! He was the most popular man in Panem. _He was the most popular man in Panem…._ I choked out another sob. "Since you won? You… you were 14 Fin! Oh my god…" He wouldn't look at me. He wouldn't move. I cupped his face in my hands. "Is this what's waiting for me when I come out Fin?" my voice was breaking. I hadn't felt this much in years. It was my third breakdown in the time span of 48 hours. I'm falling to pieces. And right before the games. "Fin I _need_ to know. Is this what's waiting for me?"

" _Yes_."

"And, if I say no?" I had a feeling that I already knew the answer.

"The people you love will be the victim of unfortunate _accidents_." Jayden…

"Jay….Is-is that why…?" tears were pouring down both of our faces. He nodded. He was swallowing hard trying to hold the tears back. Taking deep breathes, but he was losing the battle.

"I, had to protect you…" he looked into my eyes. More fire in them then I'd seen since we got here. "He couldn't know about you." His voice was shaking. "That's why…" His voice trailed off. I rested my forehead on his, our breaths mingling as we struggled to get a grip of ourselves. "I didn't know how bad it was… for you…" his voice cracked again. His agony, it was like a knife to the heart. "I didn't know…" The world was gone, what was left was an unrelenting weight. All the years I'd spent hating him for leaving me. For breaking his promise, he was suffering too. Too wrapped up in my own hell to care that he was trapped in his own. I had broken my promise. We were in a vacuum, both of us. A tube. A glass house. Trapped in a prison no one bothers to see. – People see what they want to see – He needs the truth…

"It started when I was 15." I choked a sob down. "I was trying to sell my catch at the market… no one wanted to buy the fish from a _filthy_ orphan." I took a staggered breath. "But there was a man who was watching me. As I moved from vendor to vendor. They all turned me away. The man approached me. Promised me $50. All I had to do was come to his house later that night. I was _desperate._ Kari was pregnant, close to having the baby. She needed to see a doctor, but we couldn't afford one. I agreed immediately. The largest smile on my face. Kari and the baby were going to _live_. He said he was just lonely and wanted some company. How would a 15 year old girl know what that really meant?" I forced out a bitter chuckle. "That's when it started, and it hasn't stopped. It's the only way I can keep the kids fed." Tears were streaming down my face. "It keeps them from taking tesserae. It keeps the boys from getting shot or _beaten_ by Peace Keepers. It keeps everyone safe." Finnick's hand wrapped around the back of my neck as he gave me a squeeze. I looked into his eyes and we had an understanding. Everything we needed to say was told in our eyes. His told me that this is what was waiting for me when I got out. Mine told him I accepted my fate. I thought I'd been drowning before. His eyes? His real eyes. His honest eyes. It's too heavy, I can't handle both. I need to fix his. "At least I'm already trash right?" This reality is so horrible, you have to laugh to keep from crying. Finnick jerked my chin up. Jaw tense and eyes filled with anger.

"You. Are. Not. Trash." Each word was oozing rage. His whole body tense. "If _you're_ trash then _I'm_ trash. We've done the _exact_ same things, for the _exact_ same amount of time. For the _exact_ same reasons." His thumb brushed away a tear. His hands were more calloused then I'd expect. Especially with how much the Capitol demands _perfection_. The contact igniting more feelings then I thought possible. How many of these damn things do I even have? I wanted these to stay. I wanted to be a breath away from him for the rest of my life. – Shit, I'm still in love - His thumb kept gently stroking my cheek as he stood there. He wasn't just staring. It was like he was trying to absorb ever second of this moment. I met his gaze, unknowingly attempting the same thing. Someone understands. Finnick _understands_. We've been through the same hell for the past year and a half. "I'm sorry I never came back." He whispered. Getting what you've wanted for years is bitter sweet when it's coming at one of the worst times possible. Time has never been on my side. –I'm going to fight for my death in 4 days Finnick, you say this now?-

"You – uh - probably want to shower huh?" Distance. I need distance from him. It would have been so much earlier if I could still hate him. Detachment. Distance. He isn't the same and neither am I. No happy ending, you only end up disappointed. He took a big gulp.

"Yeah, I'd like to wash tonight's _events_ off of me." He sent a sad smile my way, which I returned. "You _really_ need to get to sleep Mar. You start training in the morning." I nod looking down. Remembering where I am and why I'm here. A shuttered relay of more anguish rippling within my senses.

"It's like a slap in the face." I breathed. Meeting his perfect turquoise eyes. They were filled with concern. "I manage to forget for a second and then, I remember. It's like a slap in the face."

"I'm gonna get you out of there Mar, you're _going_ to come home." I took a step back shaking my head.

"I'm going to get _myself_ out of their Fin. I don't need to be saved. I save myself."

"No Mar," he said his voice breaking. "You save everyone _else_." I let out a half laugh.

"Close enough, yeah?" He shook his head with a sad smile.

"You need to sleep Mar. _Please_."

"I'll go try." My voice was soft, submissive, but not in a bad way. We walked down to our bedrooms. A soft smile shared as a good night. Once alone I ripped the blankets off of the sponge worthy mattress. It probably cost more than the orphanage. Disgusting. Making a little cocoon on the floor I laid down. It's the way I slept at home. Plus no beds in the arena. Training tomorrow. Well today actually. In about 5 hours… With a deep breath I cleared my thoughts and tried to sleep. Exhaustion and unconsciousness soon consumed me.

Seconds later I was being shaken awake. I groggily opened my eyes to see Al shaking me. Light was pouring through the window. I was disoriented. I didn't sleep much, so waking up from a dreamless sleep was so strange.

"wha time is it?" The words sounded muffled even to me. Al was smiling his big brother smile. I tried wiping the sleep from my eyes.

"Bout 7:30. Training's in 30 minutes." That woke me up more.

"Why didn't you wake me sooner?"

"You were actually _sleeping_ Mar." he laughed. "Besides Finnick said not to wake you up, that you'd been up late." He sent a smirk my way. "You talk to him?" I moaned and nodded. His smirk turned into one of the widest smiles I've seen on his face in a long time. Narrowing my eyes I snapped.

"Where's the stupid suit?" Suddenly there was fabric on my head.

"Get dressed slow poke." I glared at his retreating form. He always teased me in the mornings. He'd stop soon though… Ugh I do not need these thoughts right now. Focus Mar. Get ready for training. And focus. I threw on the suit. It was skin tight. And showed off my ass, chest and hips a little too well.

"Seriously?" I rolled my eyes. Heading towards the dining car I snatched an apple and flopped on one of the couches. I glanced at the table and everyone was staring. "Take a picture it'll last longer." I mumbled grumpily.

"She still hates mornings then?" Fin asked.

"With a _fiery_ passion." My response was to flip him the bird while I focused on my breakfast. "Euripides, for your safety I would advise you keep that comment to yourself." I rolled my eyes ready to tear into the capitol asshole. I looked at him waiting for him to say something. He huffed and continued to cut his toast with a fork and knife. Who does that? Just pick it up and eat it. Al and Finnick seemed to share a chuckle. I glared at both of them as well. Finished with my apple I hopped off the couch.

"Let's go _slow poke_." I sauntered towards the door, Al laughing and following.

"Slow down there tiger. I need to talk to you guys." Finnick called grabbing my elbow and pulling me back. Al joined my side. "You guys have a plan?"

" _Duh_." I drawled.

"We're going to focus on survival stations. We've got our climate in the bag, but we don't know how to survive anywhere else."

"Any thoughts about allies?" Finnick looked between me and Al.

"Predators can't be friends with their prey. It causes unnecessary complications." His eyebrow quirked.

"Your predators now?"

"Yup, but let's keep that between us. Who doesn't love surprises hmm?" Fin chuckled and nodded towards the door.

"Have fun, I'll be down later."

"…Business?" I asked voice wavering more than I'd like it.

"No meetings today." Fin grimaced. "At least not yet." Muscles relaxed without my consent. Dammit Mar Stop! Stop this now! Stop the feelings! With a nod a turned and entered the elevator. The door started to shut but Al wasn't by my side. Still rooted to the spot in front of the door.

"Do you really want to be late on your first day Al?" He was just standing there. In a daze. He snapped out of it, plastered a smile on his face and joined me. He's hiding something. This is not good.

Al's POV

While we were talking to Finnick I could feel my stomach jolt and my vision blur. _It's getting worse_. Mar and Finnick appeared to be on better terms. It's a god send. I need someone to look after her when I'm gone. She takes care of everyone BUT herself. I can trust him with her, I know I can. I felt dizzy as the elevator stopped.

"We should stick together." Mar stated. "I'm still tired, so I don't want to do anything strenuous." She knew something was up. Shit. I thought I was hiding it well. Secretly I'm grateful. I'd never admit I wasn't in good enough shape to do something. Mar knew that. We were the last team down. Everyone gathered around the head trainer. There were about 7 too many guys staring at Mar in her skin tight suit. I crossed my arms and glared. Mar keep her face blank and or annoyed. Focused on the trainer not the idiots drooling over her. Almost everyone did. She was beautiful, even as broken as she was. I was so proud of her, and scared. What if when I'm gone she stops fighting? Who will be there to change her mind? Will Finnick be around enough to do so? Will she even let him? Mar nudged my side gently, with questioning eyes. "Poisonous plants and foods station good for you?" I nodded trying to clear my head from fuzz.

"Yeah sounds good." We were sitting there for a few hours. I was trying to pay attention to the trainer, but I just couldn't focus. My head was full of fuzz. The trainer looked at me worriedly but Mar acted normal. Focused on learning as much as she could. No one came over to talk to us, which was good. We were already a team. We didn't need anyone else.

"Hey Fours! You gonna try a real station anytime soon?"

"Oh I don't see the point of trying to use weapons. With tributes like you to go against our best bet is to hide and hope you all die." Mar's voice was sickly sweet, still dead. How does she manage all of that? She works people well.

"I'd be happy to show you a thing or two honey." I looked over my shoulder at the guy who spoke. He was tall and blonde, must be from One. He was smirking. He had balls I'll give him that. He push too hard she was going to rip them off though.

"That's sweet, but you should work on your own stuff. We've only got a few days left you know." Mar sent me a glance and it was time to move. We started walking to the fire starting station.

"Hey Dan, will you stop drooling at that bitch and come here?!"

"Shut up Devi!"

"That's a fun dynamic." Mar muttered. "He's going to be trouble."

"He's from One it's expected." She hummed in response. This station was more hands on and it kept me focused a bit more. The stick fell out of my hand more than once. Mar started teasing me. Ease my frustration.

"I guess you just can't handle a big stick" That one made our trainer start choking he was laughing so hard. Mar and I both looked at the man in shock. "Shit, I'm not supposed to be killing people yet!" She kept going on, it made the poor bastard laugh more. "Okay, trainer guy. I need you to stop laughing now. Everyone is staring at me. Seriously." He didn't stop though. "Dude it's not that funny!" She was starting to get embarrassed and frustrated. I started laughing as well. Then guys started wheezing. Actual wheezing. Panicked Mar looked around with big eyes. Her eyes looked around there was a pale of water, she dumped it on the man. He yelped at the cold. But he'd finally stopped laughing. Her stance was defensive. Mar looked like she was going to either jump and give the man CPR or run for her life. She just didn't know which one yet. The trainer got up, his clothes very wet. Mar's stance relaxed. He looked between the two of us.

"She's dangerous," he said pointing towards Mar with a playful smirk. Mar's eyes widened. "That joke almost killed me." Before Mar could do or say anything the man walked away to change. Every single person in the training center was staring at us. Mar's face flushed in embarrassment.

"Shouldn't you lot be training?!" With a huff or a sigh she led me over to the painting station.

"Would you like me to paint you a normal skin tone?" Her glare widened my smile. It actually hurt.

"You can't paint for shit, now shut up, I'm trying to learn."

I hope lunch is starting soon. I'm so freaking hungry. With all the food that's available I might be getting a little soft. But it's never going to happen again. The cocky guy from One had been flexing all day. Glancing at Mar and smirking. She appeared oblivious. Appeared. Her patience with this cocky prick was waning. My thirst and hunger? That's growing. I walked away, getting a much needed drink. When I left the station the guy from One swooped in. Five minutes later and the guy was still there. He looked increasingly annoyed.

"Alright, let's break for lunch!" Mar's eyes found mine with a smile. Walked past the cocky bastard like he was nothing. Apparently that didn't happen often to him. His body language read one thing. He was pissed. She seemed oblivious. So when he wrenched her arm back there was a mild surprise on her face. Then her eyes changed. _Say good bye to your sack man._

"What makes you think you can ignore me bitch?!" In seconds he was flipped on the ground with her knee at is throat.

"What makes _you_ think you can touch me _bitch_?" She replied in a perfectly even tone. Her voice and glare honestly freaked me out. She was deadly and I knew that but I didn't see it often. She's a demon when she's pissed. After a second she got off of the loser and we headed over to lunch. Peacekeepers had headed our way. Mar just rose her hands in surrender. They nodded and went back to their posts. One and Two both walked by our table mid-meal.

"You just guaranteed yourself a painful death. You want to save yourself man, now the chance." I rose an eyebrow.

"I never back down from a challenge." They huffed and started to walk away.

"May the odds be _ever_ in your favor!" Mar called out in a mocking tone. The blonde from One had to be restrained by the guy from Two. Mar and I continued to eat ignoring the stares. Someone walked over and sat down next to me.

"So are you guys crazy or do you have a death wish?" I acknowledged him, brown hair, strong build, must be from Seven.

"Crazy." Mar answered flatly. The guy stared at her with a smirk. She finished her sandwich and looked him in the eyes. "Can I help you?" Annoyance clear. He smiled.

"I'm Gunther, I'd like to team up with you guys." Mar stood up, walking away.

"There's only one winner. Allies are pointless." He looked disappointed. He gave a stiff nod though.

"Offers still there if you change your mind." Mar walked over her face void of emotion.

"We won't." She is all of 5' 3" and she honestly makes me cringe. The guy from Seven raised his hands in surrender and walked away.

"You're terrifying you know that?" I murmured as we headed to the fire making station. "I thought I was supposed to be intimidating."

"Can't win 'em all Al." she said with a small smirk.

Finnick's POV

I came down to watch training about 30 minutes before lunch. I needed to make sure they were doing well. Al didn't seem 100% when he left. They were doing a survival station. I smirked, just like they said. Looking around I noticed that most of the guys were staring at Mar. Stomach and jaw clenched without consent. I couldn't deny I was doing the same. But, they weren't allowed to look at her like that. Like a piece of meat. Al got up, heading for the drinking fountain, then a tall blonde walks over to Mar. I couldn't hear what they were saying because of the distance, but the way that guy was looking at Mar made me want to skin him alive. _Okay Fin, calm the hell down, she only just started talking to you 10 hours ago._ Lunch was called and Mar got up, ignoring the blonde. He looked pissed. He grabbed her arm. I tensed. In seconds Mar had him flipped onto his back with her knee to his throat. That's my girl. _But she's not your girl._ It wouldn't matter if she were. Snow would have her killed or worse.

"Well, that's quite a girl you've got there Odair." Gloss's smug voice appeared beside me along with the muscle bound man himself. I smirked in response.

"She certainly got the drop on your tribute."

"She did, disappointing really. He should stop staring at her ass and start working on survival skills like we told him." Cashmere's voice drawled as she appeared next to her brother.

"She does have a nice ass." Gloss stated obviously checking her out. I ground my teeth in an attempt to calm down. Cashmere smacked the back of her brother's head.

"Stop being a perv Gloss, we are supposed to be focusing on _our_ tributes." Gloss sent her a glare and started to walk off with Cashmere close behind. Mar was in the cafeteria being approached by some other guy. Am I going to have to watch these assholes flirt with her constantly? _They won't just be flirting with her when she gets back._ I decided to go talk to them see how it's going. I walk over as the other guy stated.

"Offers still there if you change your mind."

"We won't" Mar's reply was blunt and clear. The guy walked off disappointed. Mar and Al headed back out towards the stations. I decided to join them.

"Glad to see you're playing nice with others Marmaid." Mar looked up at me with a glare. Al looked clearly amused at the name.

"If you call me that again _Odair_ , I will castrate you in your sleep." Mar's voice was icy, eyes cold and a wicked smirk on her face. "That goes double for you _Allie poo_." Al's cheeks flushed a bit and he crossed his legs a little tighter.

"Alright, _alright_. Don't say it again." Mar wore a triumphant smirk on her face as she started to build a fire. She moved her hands with grace and speed. _What else can she do I wonder._ Yup again, she JUST STARTED TALKING TO YOU 11 HOURS AGO!

"So you guys have gained quite the fan club." I stated as Mar furiously spun the stick. In seconds a spark ignited into a flame.

"One of the downfalls of being sexy. You should know all about that Odair." Wait what.

"D-did you just call me sexy?" She grabbed the cup of water and put out the growing flame.

"Stating a fact Odair." She met my curious eyes. "I didn't say it was a _good_ thing." She rolled her shoulders. "Are those sponsors up there watching us?" she said nodded subtly towards the group of men that were indeed watching the tributes.

"Yeah," she nodded, face thoughtful.

"Alright, that's enough training for today. Put your weapons back and return to your floors and rest up. We'll start again tomorrow at 8 am." Mar stood up offering a hand to Al, then me. We walked to the elevator and ended up riding up with Eight and Three. I nodded to BeeTee he returned the gesture. Once on our floor Mar started to roll her shoulders.

"Stiff?" Al asked her.

" _Very_." Was her response. She hummed as she pulled her arm across her chest. Her _very_ defined chest. In her _skin tight_ suit that left next to nothing for the imagination. _God I'm a pervert._ Al sat down on a couch letting out a breath. Mar continued her stretching. And I continued watching as subtly as possible.

"Mar?"

"Hmm?" was her response.

"We should do yoga tomorrow." That got everyone's attention. Mar stopped her stretching and rose a brow. "Fin said those were sponsors right? Show them how graceful you are."

"You mean how _flexible_ I am."

"Flexibility is a good trait."

"Al, they're all going to sleep with me after I've won, they can wait."

"Exactly. Make them crave you." She sighed. "They're already interested."

"Of course they are. This stupid outfit leaves NOTHING to the imagination. _Ugh_!" Throwing her arms into the air she flopped on a couch across from Al. "I'm a person, not a piece of ass." Agreed!

"I know Mar. They just don't care." Al's voice was soft and sad. She covered her eyes with her hands and groaned.

"Well they'll stare either way. Might as well give them a _reason_ to hmm?" Wait _what_?!

"I don't think that's a good idea." They both looked at me.

"What else are we supposed to do?" Mar asked. _Not make the most powerful men in Panem want to sleep with you_ "It needs to be something low impact."

"The games aren't going to be low impact."

"In case you've forgotten Al is _dying_." Mar's voice was angry and sad. "He needs to rest as much as possible before we go in."

"It'll be fine Mar, we'll try some easy things like climbing okay?" Al soothed.

"Yeah you dying is _totally_ fine. And us going into an arena and having to fight for our lives is _totally_ fine. And my only interesting factor being my body is _totally fine._ And me being nothing more than a tool and a _sex object_ is totally _fine_. _Everything_ is huncky fucking dory." Mags walked over and tugged on Mar's hands. I wanted to wrap her in my arms again. How many excuses have I found to do that in the last 48 hours?

"Ib dobnt maber wah deh call oo. Ib mabers what oo call or self." Mar's face started to pale. "Ooo are oo? Urvibor er ore?" Mar took a deep breath.

"I'm a survivor." She said her voice low and clear.

"I kno. Dobnt oo forbet ib" Mar had tears in her eyes but she nodded. Mags kissed her forehead and gave a big toothless smile. I owe everything to Mags. Without her, I wouldn't be here. It looked like that's just what Mar needed to hear. Mags gave a firm nod, then she yawned.

"You wanna go lay down Mags?" I asked hopping up. She nodded. I grabbed her arm and gently lead her to her room.

"I'll take her Finnick." Al called out. "I could use a nap too." Mags smiled at Al patting his arm gently with her wrinkled hand. Al and Mags left the room. I turned to Mar and noticed we were alone again. She flopped back down on the couch covering her eyes. I walked over eyes trailing up her legs. _Stop checking her out asshole! Comfort her!_

"You can't be comfortable in that thing." I stated she peeked out from behind her hands. "Go change into something comfortable so you can relax." I suggested. She sat up and cocked her head to the side. God she's adorable. _Please for the love of God change out of that thing. You are killing me Marjorie I don't think you even know it._

She stood slowly licking her bottom lip "Don't like the view?" she asked in a very sultry voice. _Does she know what she's doing to me?_ I couldn't help but admire the sway in her hips as she stepped closer. _Shit. That's hot._ I felt my cock twitch involuntarily. _Shit! Don't you fucking start that dammit._ "Is that why you were staring at me all through training?" _No! Nononononononono. Stop! Finnick Odair you stop right now!_ She smirked god was it sexy. _Why are you doing this to me Mar? Do you have any idea how sexy you are?_ She took three slow steps forward and it took all of my self-control not to pull her into my arms again. Where she _belongs_ , might I add. She was right in front of me, less than 6 inches between us. She gazed into my eyes. " _Interesting_." She damn near purred. _Fucking PURRED_. ' _Interesting'_ what the fuck does that even mean?! She left me standing in the room alone. Thanking god I wore loose pants today because I was _fully_ erect. I did not need her thinking I was only talking to her again because she was sexy. _But damn was she sexy. I wonder what it'd feel like having her plump lips on mine. Or around my cock…_ It twitched again. Ugh… _When the hell did I start thinking like this?! I'm not this guy! I'm not an asshole!_

"Dammit I need a cold shower… _NOW_ "

After a 30 minute freezing shower I was finally able to think about Mar without getting hard. Fucking hell; all the women in the capitol and not one of them has turned me on like that. I calmed down and decided to get something to eat. In the living room Mar was on the floor contorted into one of the sexiest positions I've ever seen. Her perfect ass was in the air and I could see down her baggy shirt to her black sports bra…. _Fuck fuck fuck. - Yes I would. I'd ravish her until the sun came up. We'd go at it for hours if she wanted. I'd pleasure her in every way imaginable and show her the love and care that she deserves. I'd rock her fucking world so hard that she wouldn't be able to walk the next morning. -_ Suddenly a hand clapped on my shoulder. Aralia was smirking at me.

"You're drooling." She whispered in my ear. I wiped my mouth and I actually was. I'm Finnick Odair Sex God of the Capitol and she had me _drooling_. My best friend in the whole world had me _drooling_. _Are we even friends again? It doesn't matter you can't have her either way. It's not right. Fuuuuuuck._ I let out an involuntary groan and went back to my room. How many times was this going to happen over the next week? _Probably a lot._

Mar's POV

I thought I heard someone come in the room. But I was in the middle of a really hard pose. It's one of the best stretches for my shoulders and lower back. It feels soooo good but takes concentration. I was focusing on my breathing when I saw Aralia walk around the chair that was blocking my view of the door and sit down in it.

"Flexible little thing aren't you?"

"Bipolar little thing aren't you?" I countered with a smirk. She laughed out right at that.

"Can you show me?" I smiled

"Yeah I'd love to."

Dinner was a few hours later. Aralia was convinced that she was dying. She lasted almost an hour. She fell a lot. The only reason she stopped was because she was tired of me laughing at her. It was the happiest I've been in a while. Finnick didn't show up for dinner. I frowned looking around.

"Is Finnick at a meeting?" I asked suddenly. Euripides looked my way shaking his head. Aralia smirked.

"No, I'm sure he's just in the shower." _Why is she smirking about him being in the shower?_

"What? He went to shower 2 hours ago. He's probably just tired."

"Yeah not everyone can go all day running on only a few hours' sleep." Al stuck his tongue out at me, I returned the gesture. We joked throughout the night. Finnick never appearing. It made me worry. I was only teasing him earlier. He looked like a deer caught in headlights too. I hope he wasn't mad. My thoughts and feet led me straight to his room. I knocked a few times, not hearing any sound.

"Finn, you okay?" I pushed the door open gently. He was sleeping, his shirt was off and chest was fully on display. _Can I say god damn?!_ Chills ran up and down my spine. His waist was covered but his hip was poking out just a bit. I bite my lip. He was in boxers. They were hanging low too. I could see his defined pelvic muscle that lead down under the covers. _Mmmm, now that is a beautiful sight. The things I could do..._ Oh my god, that's what _tons_ of women think about him all the time. _How can you think like that Mar?_ I don't want to be one of them. I want to be so much more. _There's more important things happening here then what you want._ Yeah I know, there always are. I'm going into the games in 4 days. I need to focus. But the only thing I _want_ to focus on is Finnick. His face is relaxed but, his lips are formed into a defined frown. _What is he dreaming about I wonder. Does he ever dream about me?_ Shaking my head violently. It didn't matter. I am a Tribute for the Hunger Games which is starting in 4 days. I backed out of his room and shut the door gently. A hand grasped my shoulder gently. In an instant I had the person slammed to the wall. Al's eyes were wide with fear. Adrenalin is my best friend when it comes to fighting larger opponents. I never meant to hurt Al though. "Sorry," I breathed letting him go.

"It's okay for you to feel Mar, you know that right? It makes you human." I took a deep breathe.

"I can't be human Al. I can't be decent. I have to win. I have to get home. I made a promise. And I"

"Always keep your promises I know." Al ran his hand through his shortened hair. "Promise me Mar…"

"Promise you what?"

"That when some guy comes along and he proves that he isn't going anywhere. _Promise me_ that you'll let him in. That you'll ignore the voice in the back of your head that tells you why it won't work. Why it's not worth it. That you don't deserve to be happy." His voice had dropped in volume considerably. "You of all people deserve to be happy Mar. You've sacrificed so much already. Suffered so much already. Promise me Mar. Promise you'll fight for yourself too. Fight for your happiness too." I looked into his eyes. I wanted to say no. I needed to say no. Saying yes would be a lie. I can't promise that. His face dropped. He knew my internal conflict. "Can you at least promise me you'll try?" I nodded softly. "Say it Mar." _God damn him_.

"I-i-i-I promise." Al kissed my forehead gently. I just lied to my best friend. I just lied to my dying best friend. "You look like hell. Go try and sleep." I scoffed.

"Just what every woman wants to hear." Rolling my eyes I headed a few doors down and entered my room. I climbed onto the floor with the pillows. I set the wall to show the ocean. I started to tear up, so I shut it off. Sitting on the floor wrapped in blankets with my head in my hands. I always keep my promises. How the hell will I keep this one? How am I supposed to save everyone and myself? I can't do it all. The kids have such a better chance at life then I do. They can do things. Good things. They won't be able to if their covered in scars that match mine. I can't let them go through that. I have to protect them. But… I can't save the kids and myself. So then… who's gonna save me? _I'm not worth saving. No matter what Al says. They matter more._

I didn't sleep. Or leave my room. Just lying on the floor staring at the ceiling. It's the worst thing I could be doing right now. I needed to focus. Instead? I go over every single reason that has led me to this exact moment. There wasn't anything else I could really do. There's too much information to process, new and old. Too many things to wrap my head around. I needed the ocean. That's what I needed. I was drowning on dry land. I can't breathe here. I need the ocean. I need home.

But I'm at the capitol. Thousands of miles away. Caught in their net. They can synthesize anything here. That's the problem though, nothing is real. I need real. I need home. I need to be under water so there's a good reason for it to feel like the world is crashing down on me. I've been washed ashore. Stranded. I haven't been this scared in years. I need Ari. Ari looks at me like I can do anything. I need to feel that right now. But I never want Ari to come to this over decorated hell hole. I want to go home.

"Rise and shine Marmaid! Time to train." Al's sing song voice rang from the other side of the door. The sound made me want to jump out of my skin. Was it already morning? Fighting my own demons before I get to go into an arena with 22 other people who want to kill me, not the best plan. It is what it is.

"Be out in five." I called out. My voice was rough. I hadn't sobbed at least. Find that silver lining right? – Find it so I can strangle everyone who looks at me wrong - I put on my skin tight suit. I'd be wearing more clothes if I were naked, honestly! It squeezes everything more than it should. Especially the chest and butt areas – duh, sex sells – UGH! This stupid fucking suit wasn't helping. Entering the dining area everyone was already there. I sat next to Al and set my head on the table.

"You didn't sleep?" I gave him a look. It screamed ' _what do you think?_ ' "I'll do my best to keep others away from you then." A grunt left my lips. "Eat Mar." I grunted again. "Marjorie Louise Scur. Eat. Now."

"Alright guys, second day of training today. Mar, don't fight with the other tributes. You will not win points with the Gamemakers. I grunted in response. Finnick must not have been paying attention. He was using his different voice. He wasn't Finnick Odair of District Four. He was Finnick Odair Capitol Darling. I hated this Finnick. Al grabbed my hair forcing my head from the table. He shoved a roll in my mouth. When he let go I swept his chair out from under him. The chair made a large clattering sound.

"What the hell is wrong with you!" Euripides screamed. A few of Al's stylists rushed to help him up. Fussing over him like he was a baby.

"He's a grown fucking man. Stop babying him. The games aren't going to fucking baby him. And he knows better than to grab my fucking hair. EVER. He knows better than to press me in the morning. He fell all of 3 feet onto carpeting. Calm the hell down." The others were still scolding me. Does everyone in the Capitol sound like an angry chicken when they speak. Or a chick. Tiny squeaking noises constantly.

"You didn't sleep at all..."

"What was the first hint?" I glared at Al grabbing a knife to put some jelly on the roll he stuffed in my mouth. I'm being pushed too fucking far with this shit. "Not even in the fucking games yet and all I can see when I close my eyes is your death, or mine. They're going to hate me Al. What am I supposed to tell your kid huh?"

"I'm already dying Mar."

"You seem just fine to me."

"That's because I'm good at hiding it. I've been hiding it from everyone for the last FOUR MONTHS Mar."

"It's not fucking fair!" I screamed. The butter knife that had been in my hand was imbedded into the wall. "You shouldn't have to die Al! It's. It's too fucking much okay! You're keeping me together Al. You always call my bullshit. Always push back. No one else has the balls to do that Al. How. How am I supposed to keep my promise?! Why would you? You know that trying to do this is going to tear me apart!" My face was red with anger and pain. Al stepped closer. I shoved him away. He grabbed my arms and forced me into his chest.

"You can't save everyone Mar."

"I feel so fucking weak Al." I breathed. "I'm sobbing non fucking stop. I've never cried this much in my entire fucking life. Not when I found my house burned down. Now when Kari died in my arms… I just…"

"You're not weak." Al breathed. "You're human."

"I don't want to be."

"Tough shit."

"Jackass." Al smiled warmly and brushed a few tears away.

"Come on we're gonna be late."

"Fuck..." I started shaking my head. "Okay. Right. Plan, quiet, mysterious. Going to focus on light physical activity today, yeah?" Al and I started for the door.

"Sounds good Joy Joy."

"Don't call me that."

"Do you prefer Marmaid?"

"I was not kidding when I said I would castrate you Alnus Rickter." Al took a few steps back. Someone placed a hand on my shoulder. Jumping into action I ducked down grabbing his wrist, forcing his arm behind his back. Kicking the back of his knee forcing him to the ground. I started panting. Then I realized it was Finnick. "Shit..." I let him go instantly and stepped back. "Sorry..." I started breathing heavily. Tears were gathering in my eyes.

"Are you okay Mar?" He looked scared. Genuinely scared. I laughed. A bitter rage filled laugh.

"No." taking a deep breath I stepped towards the door, "We're going to be late." My voice was softer. I didn't look back. I couldn't. I was losing it. Bad.

Finnick's POV

Mar had me on the ground in 30 seconds. Flashing back to the games before I heard her ragged voice. "Shit… sorry…" I stayed kneeling on the ground too shocked to move. I looked at Mar as she moved towards the door. "Are you okay Mar?" The strangled laugh that left her throat was filled with so much emotion that she might explode.

"No." she turned again "We're going to be late." The girl I knew never would have snapped like that. Never. She'd lost so much. And she was going into the games to lose more. A hand appeared in front of me. Al hoisted me up. He clapped my shoulder with a sad smile.

"She a bitch when she's tired. But a demon when she's scared. Don't touch her if she can't see who you are."

"Thanks for the tip." I stuttered out. She was losing it. Al knew too. "I'm coming with you guys." Al raised an eyebrow. "Moral support." He nodded.

"I don't know what good that will do, but it can't hurt." He paused for a second. "What she really needs is to get into a good fight. Like a really good fight."

"She could get hurt."

"She's about to explode with emotions. Physical pain means she's alive. She still has a chance. She hasn't failed completely."

"Failed what?" Al didn't say anything. He jogged over to the elevator. Mar was waiting for him. "I'll be down later guys. Remember," I pointed at Mar. "No fights yet." I gave her a playful glare. She returned it with a blank cold face. My smirk dropped. I caught a nod from Al in my peripheral vision. But I didn't really care at this moment. There were so many emotions in her eyes. It made me sick just looking at all of them. Constantly whipping around like a hurricane. She'd said a storm was coming and she was right. If she didn't get a release soon… she wouldn't make it till the games.

An hour later I came down to the training center. Mar looked tenser than I'd ever seen her. Like the weight of the world was on her shoulders. I knew the feeling. She and Al were running the obstacle course. Al slipped up a lot. Mar and everyone else in the room noticed. A few of the other tributes noticed. Especially the jerk from 1. He watched Mar the whole day. A hand slipped up and down my back, slowly.

"Hello Mr. Odair..." A squeaky voice purred in my ear. I did my best not to cringe. Placing my 'Capitol Smirk' on my face I turned to see a hideous woman. Her hair was mint green her skin vibrant orange. _'I'm going to have to fuck a carrot…'_

"How are you today sweetheart?" She was even uglier when she blushed. Her giggle could break glass it was so shrill.

"You look so tense, why don't you come with me and I'll help you relax." I doubt that very much… Plastering a wider smile I coed.

"A beautiful woman like you should be pampered. Don't worry about little old me." She giggled again. I really want to puke. "Would you head to the elevator Hun? I need to talk to my tributes quickly, then I'll be all yours." She batted her fake lashes. Is that supposed to be sexy? She turned and sauntered away. I turned back to Mar and Al to see that they were both watching. I started towards them and Mar launched herself up the rope ladder. Guilt smothered me. I was adding more weight. More pain for her.

"She isn't pissed at you man." Al murmured softly. "She knows a proposition when she sees one." I swallowed thickly. The lump in my throat growing.

"Yeah, tell her to meet me here at 6 okay? I know you don't want to but she needs to work on her weapons."

"Yeah I will." Al clapped his hand on my shoulder again. "Good luck with that man…" he nodded subtly towards the elevator.

"Ohhh Fiiiinnnnnnick." Her shrill voice echoed through the entire training center. I gave Al a quick look. Then turned around with my capitol smirk and swagger. The carrot lady was biting her finger. Thank god for the pills or I'd never be able to get this shit done.

Mar's POV

I jumped down after finishing the course. It was just… worse… Seeing that... I walked up to Al. "What did he want?"

"He scheduled a private training time for us. Meet here at 6 pm." with a firm nod my eyes wandered to the elevator where Finnick had just left.

"He doesn't have a choice Mar…"

"I know…" I breathed out. After a pause I looked at Al. "Is this how you guys feel, when I..?"

"...yeah…"

"I'm sorry…" tears were building.

"Why? For sacrificing everything you are to keep us all alive?" Al's voice was light. "I think we should be apologizing to you Mar." Confusion set firmly on my face. "For holding you back." Something changed in my eyes and heart. "You all give me purpose. Not hold me back. You all are my reasons to live." taking a deep breath I turned looking off. "I'd be nothing without all of you…" Al grabbed my hand with a gentle squeeze.

"Let's go learn how to do something we've never done before."

"Archery?"

"Why not." We spent the rest of training learning how to use a bow. After lunch we went over to the survival stations again. Training finished up around 4 pm. Al was winded. I could tell. No one bothered us. They'd stare and murmur, but that was it. Nothing new there. We made it to the fourth floor. "I'm gonna go rest up for training, okay?" I nodded towards Al. If he was still asleep I wasn't going to wake him for training. He was tired. We had one more day of training before the assessments. Then the interviews... Then the games… None of the Capitol clucks also known as Euripides and his posse, were around. So the living room was oddly quiet. I started on some yoga again. Not bothering to take off my suit or shower. Everything was tense. Everything. 30 minutes later Finnick walked in, somewhat disheveled. He didn't look as bad as the other night. Our eyes locked. He looked like he wanted to say something but thought better of it.

"Be ready in 15 okay?" a quick nod sent him on his way. 15 minutes later Finnick walked into the room fresh. Hair still slightly damp. "Come on."

"What about Al?"

"He said he needed to rest." Tears found their way back to my eyes. I'm crying so fucking much this week. "C'mon." Finnick reached out his hand and gestured me forward. The ride down was silent. So was the training center. It was different. I turned to ask Finnick what the plan was. In seconds he'd pinned me to the ground. "You're dead."

"What the fuck Finnick?!" I roared.

"Get up!" I was on my feet for all of 3 seconds before he lunged again. This time he had me in a headlock. "I've killed you twice now." he threw my head away from him. "The games aren't going to wait for you to be ready. A lot of the tributes here are bigger than you. How are you going to fight them off?"

"Same way I've fought people off for the last 3 years." He lunged again. Finnick was so fast. I was on the ground face down, with his knee in my shoulder blades. Hands pinned.

"If this is how you've fought them then it's a miracle you're still alive." He got up again. Taking a step back. I turned swinging my leg beneath him. Bringing him to the floor.

"Excuse me for not considering you a threat." I murmured angrily. He was on top of me again in seconds. It was frustrating. He'd hit the ground hard. How was he moving still?

"I am a dangerous man Marjorie." Trust me I know. "I've survived the games already if you've forgotten." He is dangerous – dangerously close – he could kill me in a second – but he couldn't if he tried – why am I not afraid? – I trust him. Trust. His eyes. They weren't his capitol eyes, or his happy eyes. They were just void. "I've been seconds from killing you four times now."

"You won't Finnick. You'd never hurt me. Not on purpose." I murmured softly. His grip on my hands loosened and I tugged them free. He was supporting his weight on his forearms. We were breathing the same air. Breathing into each other. Why I did what I did next I'll never know. Tracing the outline of his face. Moving gently from his broad jaw to his full cheeks. Eyes tracing where my hands wouldn't move. He leaned into the touch. He's right here. ' _He's a distraction…_ ' I kept my hand where it was quickly pressing his face to the side using my hips I bucked him off of me. A fake knife to his neck. My legs on either side of his hips. Lust filled his eyes along with a large amount of surprise.

"One to four." He paused smirking. "I'm still winning." he picked me up by my hips and threw me off of him. I hit the ground with a thud and rolled. We fought like that for an hour. No rest. One attack after the other. Finnick was winning by our first break. We were both panting a sweating. "Good, I think that's enough hand to hand." _Thank god_. "Five minute break then we're moving on to weapons. What are you best at?"

"Throwing knives." I managed to pant out. "Spears. And… tridents... of course." He nodded.

"Nothing surprising, being from Four. We'll need to catch their attention another way."

"So dress me in next to nothing. Sex sells, you know that Fin." Finnick slammed his fist on the mat.

"You. Are. Not. An. Object." He punctuated each word. I giggled.

"I haven't seen you this mad since I was 8 years old and Jay ate your special cookies." His eyes softened for half a second. He stepped forward and cupped my face.

"I had spent all of my money on the ingredients and made them for you. Don't change the subject." He took a shaking breath. Eyes flicking to my lips every few seconds. We stood there waiting. For what I'm not sure.

"I don't need training in how to kiss Finnick. I'm already good at that."

"Let me be the judge of that." Breathing while capturing my lips with his. The power and emotion was intense. I couldn't move. I couldn't breathe. My body reacted like this was the most natural thing in the world. Kissing him was easier the breathing. My hands worked their way into his hair before. Seconds later we both pulled away. His forehead resting on mine he looked down. I stared at his face. Looking for regret, for anything. "You were right…" he looked back up at me and a million things were said between the two of us. ' _Love is a distraction. You can't be distracted._ ' the voice in the back of my head taunted.

"I told you." I whispered stepping away. "Now how about you teach me things I don't know, that will actually _help_ me in the games?" He swallowed heavily. Both of us still out of breath.

"Right." running his hands through his hair and avoiding my eyes he headed over to the knife station. "Show me what you've got." I nodded. Taking the knifes in my hands. Precision. The closest to home I was going to get is right here. With a knife in my hand. I was collecting my thoughts. I heard Finnick take a step forward. He had a wooden sword in his hand. Stepping back while blocking his blow we started again. He disarmed me after 5 minutes. I rolled grabbing the closest thing I could find. Which happened to be a spear. Neither of us backed down. We were surprisingly well matched. I don't know how long we were at it but eventually we both tired. "I think we can place fighting with spears on your list of strengths. It's not something you'll get to show the judges, but in the games, it will save you, without a doubt." We were both panting. I doubled over. "I think that's enough for tonight. Thank god Exhaustion. How was I even supposed to walk to the elevator. "Come on, it's late."

"I think... I'll... just.. sleep here..." I wheezed out. Finnick laughed at me. He managed to cradle me in his arms. Started stumbling towards the door. "Now we're both going to fall." I wheezed out.

"It's only 100 yards, I've got this." just as he finished speaking his knee buckled slightly. I laughed and held onto him tighter. Afraid of falling. A genuine smile on both of our faces. "Don't you trust me?" I rolled my eyes at his cocky smirk. We managed to stumble into the elevator and collapse onto one of the couches. Both breathing heavily.

"Where the hell have you two been? Oh honestly! Finnick!" Euripides clucked on. Finn and I both ignored him. He nestled his head in the crook of my neck. Hot breath tickling my sweaty skin.

"Mmm, I think I'll sleep right here." Finn nuzzled his hair tickling my face.

"MMmmn no Finnick, get up! You're crushing me!" he whined like a kicked dog in response. The laugh that escaped my lips was the most genuine sound of happiness I've made in years. I felt him smile against my skin. "Finnick. Get. Off."

"Night night Marmaid."

"Finnick I'm warning you." he hummed in response. I grabbed his sides and began my torture. He squawked a very undignified sound as he rolled us off the couch. I landed on top of him with a thud. We both groaned. I was still laughing. He had his eyes closed in pain. Peeking one eye open he glared at me. I laughed louder. "Hey. I warned you." Getting up quickly, I offered Fin my hand. "Are you okay?" he started rubbing the back of his head.

"I'll live." he chuckled softly.

"Good, I can't have your fans killing me before I enter the arena." sending him a wink I turned and stumbled towards the bedrooms. I barely made it to my room. Collapsing on the bed, unconscious before I even made contact with the over plush piece of furniture.

Finnick's POV

"She's the one isn't she?" Euripides murmured. I turned to him smile fading from my face. "The one you talked about all the time, during your first games?" I don't know why I don't like him knowing that. He nods sadly. "Be careful Finnick." with that he turned for his room. It was 10 at night. I had managed to satisfy my clients this afternoon, so I could actually sleep in my own bed. Tomorrow is the last day of group training then the individual assessment. Then the interviews... then the games... Heading towards my room, I hear Al coughing violently. I open the door and his doubled over on the floor crawling towards the bathroom. Throwing his arm over my shoulder I drag him the rest of the way. He vomits in the toilet. Blood. He's shaking and gagging. After about 5 minutes he's calmed down.

"Uggh, I'm so glad you aren't Mar." he sighed grabbing one of the white towels and wiping the excess blood from his face. My eyes were wide as they watched him. "You can't tell her man." he sighed. "She's got enough on her plate." nodding absentmindedly I took in the man before me.

"You're really dying?" I breathe after a minute or two. His eyes close and he gives a stiff nod.

"I'm really dying." taking in a ragged breath. "Mar doesn't know how bad. I've... I've got sores in my lungs. It's not too bad if I'm not breathing heavily. But when I am, the tissue tears, blood pools. I choke on my own blood." What a horrible way to go. "You get why I didn't want to stay home? I...I don't want them to see me like that. And I saved that kid. It almost makes leaving Ruddy worth it. I'll be there to protect Mar. And I'm dying anyway. I'm dying... Some tough shit to wrap your head around." He cleared his throat shaking his head. "Look man, I need you to look after Mar when I'm gone. She's gonna lose her shit in a big way."

"Don't worry about that." he smirked

"I knew you liked her." nodding and sighing he rested his head back. "Good. Good." We sat in his bathroom for a few minutes, he started dozing off.

"Come on Man, let's get you in bed." shaking him gently his eyes came in and out of focus.

"You know, she used to cry for you all the time." I took his weight with little effort, "You broke her when you didn't come back." God dammit I figured that out, I don't need to hear it from you Al. "Don't do it again man. If you're going to then don't try and get close okay? Please," Al was lying in bed, on his side mumbling incoherent things. Shutting his door gently I walked into Mar's hoping that hadn't woken her up. She was passed out on the bed. Well partially on the bed. Her left leg was on the floor holding her up. Her shoes and suit were both still on. Gently picking her legs up and shifting her whole body onto the bed she started to snore slightly. It wasn't loud or annoying. Still not something I expected. She was nothing like I expected. The girl I knew was definitely gone. But who she was now? That woman was captivating in every sense of the word. No one set fire to my soul the way she did. I've been with dozens of women. Not one of them made me feel anything close to what she did. Her lips were addicting. They felt better than any orgasm I'd ever had – I've had a lot - She was sweaty, smelled horrible, her hair was a mess, and I'd honestly never witnessed anything or anyone so beautiful. ' _You're wrong Al, I don't like her_.' placing a sweet kiss on her damp forehead I walked out the door. Closing it softly I leaned against it for 30 seconds. ' _I think I love her..._ '

At breakfast the next morning I received a letter from President Snow. He had a full docket for me today. Four clients in one day... Frowning at the paper, Mar stumbled into the room. She looked drunk.

"Mar did you get drunk last night?" Al accused. Mar's response was to flip him off. While stumbling to the left a little. Al jumped up and grabbed her. She flinched as he touched her arms. "Mar what the hell?!" Her head fell back lidded dark green eyes meeting Al's

"Training." she mumbled before jerking forward into Al's chest. He laughed. She was half asleep standing up and leaning on him.

"You actually got her to sleep?"

"They should have, Finnick and Mar were in the training room for five hours last night!" Aralia commented joining the table. Was it really five hours? "Euripides had a search party ready to go." she laughed. I knew the man was fond of me. But like anyone else in the Capitol he saw what he wanted to see. The Capitol Golden Boy. Not Finnick Odair. Al laughed, steering Mar to her seat. Then letting the woman rest on his shoulder while he fed her bread.

"Whatever you did man, do it again tonight. She needs as much sleep as she can get." I nodded. "What did you work on?"

"Hand to hand combat. How to fight someone twice your size."

"So you noticed that ass from One eyeing her up too?" I scoffed.

"Hard to miss." Al chuckled and nodded as well.

"Marmalade." she mumbled. Al grabbed on and brought it to her. She took my bread and dunked it in the bowl. No knife, no anything. The look of horror on Euripides face was classic. I poured her a cup of coffee. Putting 3 sugar cubes and some creamer in it.

"Have her drink this."

"What is it?"

"Coffee, it'll help wake her up." Al nodded. He fed the girl her bread and coffee. Is this how she is every time she sleeps?

"Only when she sleeps well." Al replied. "You said that out loud." Feeling my cheeks heat up a bit I nodded.

"Right, well, I can't come watch your training today. I've got a big day scheduled with sponsors and other mentor like stuff." Al nodded in understanding Mar was finally holding the cup on her own. "Have a good day you guys. Mar? Meet me at the training center again. Meet me at 7. We aren't going to work as long tonight okay?" She grunted in response. Not lady like or dignified at all. A smile broke out on my face. Hard not to smile when she's around.

Mar's POV

This coffee stuff is magic. I'm still blinking away the sleep when Finnick leaves. He said my name so I grunted in response. I'll ask Al what he said when I'm more awake. I hate sleeping, I always wake up groggy and useless. My body craves it so much that I never get enough. I'm better off not sleeping at all. I'm still waking up when we head to the training center. Al says he wants to stick to the survival stations today. I agree. Thoroughly sore from the work out last night with Finnick. Glancing at the mats where he kissed me last night I feel the same butterflies returning. I only let it last for a second. I can't be falling again. This is dangerous. A distraction. I'm glad Finnick won't be here. I need a break from him. The more he's around the softer I become. Happiness never lasts. Better to not have it at all.

Training was not taxing at all. I'd work hard tonight at training with Finnick. The hours ticked by until it was time to go. At 6:55 Finnick still hadn't come back to the apartment so I left figuring I'd meet him there. The room was empty, so I just grabbed some knives and started warming up. Strapping them to a belt I took off jogging around the room. After my heart started pumping I started throwing. In the zone I didn't hear Finnick come in. He started clapping and i launched a knife right at his head. Luckily he dropped down.

"I know I'm late, but I didn't think you'd actually try to kill me because of it."

"Expect the unexpected." I murmured still trying to catch my breath.

"Right, well. Let's work on one of your weak weapons." Finnick had stood up and was moving towards the weapon cart. "You don't need help with those." sharing a smirk i retrieved the other knives I'd thrown. "So, what are you bad at?"

"I struggle with swords." Finnick nodded in understanding.

"Great. Time for a crash course."

"I thought you said you were bad at the sword." We had been at it for about an hour. Maybe longer. I was more focused on attacking and defending then the time.

"No I said I struggle with the sword."

"I didn't notice you struggling at all." Finnick let loose an airy laugh.

"Expect the unexpected."

"What can't you do?" Finnick laughed at me. It's true, but I can't seem to do one of the most important things in the world...

"I can't do a lot of things." – Provide, protect my loved ones -

"Like what?"

"Save the people I love. Keep them safe." The mood in the room dropped instantly. Finnick was next to me. I could feel his eyes boring into the side of my face. "Bring the dead back to life. Right injustice. Stop mistreatment."

"I can help you Mar. Let… let me help you. Please." his voice was soft. Almost desperate. Looking into his turquoise eyes. My favorite color in the world. Filled to the brim with fear and love…

"No." my voice held more strength than I'd felt since before the reaping. Pain flashed in his eyes. I couldn't say why. I couldn't say it out loud. "It's better this way." my resolve was slipping. "We've both got jobs to do. This. It would get in the way. Love is a distraction." drowning again in the weight of my words. I don't know who they hurt more. Me or him. I needed air. I need to be away from Finnick while I still have the strength to walk away. It's slipping. I'm slipping… Finnick spun me around. Slamming me into his chest. It might have been the impact, it might have been the way his eyes drank in my every feature. But the whole world stopped. He held my face firmly, inches away from his. I'm slipping.

"Look me in the eye and tell me you don't love me." I _can't_. "I won't stop fighting for this until you do. I won't let you go again. It was the biggest mistake I've ever made."

"It was the best thing you could have done."

"No it wasn't."

"I'm trash Finnick. Poison.

"No you aren't"

"Everyone I love is taken away from me. Every single person."

"I will protect you. All of them. I'll be there." be strong. Be strong. You have to walk away. It's for the best.

"No you won't. I won't let you." anger filled his face.

"Why won't you let me in! WHY AM I NOT GOOD ENOUGH ANYMORE?!"

"YOU LEFT ME FINNICK!"

"I WAS PROTECTING YOU!"

"I KNOW!"

"THEN WHY THE HELL ARE YOU HOLDING IT AGAINST ME?!"

"I'M NOT FINNICK!"

"BULLSHIT YOU AR"

"I CAN'T GO THROUGH THAT AGAIN! I! CAN'T!" our red faces and heaving chests faced each other once more. "I can't go through that again Finnick. I can't lose you again.."

"Mar you wo"

"Don't you dare say I wouldn't lose you Odair. Finn that isn't your choice." my voice broke, so did the tears. "We're pawns Finn… pawns don't get to fall in love. When they do, they get killed or worse…. There are so so many things worse than death Finn… so many things…" breathe _Mar breathe. Get it together. You're going into the games in two days. Get your head right_. He was standing 6 inches away. I could tell he wanted to reach out, but he was stopping. "You're a distraction Odair. I can't afford any distractions. I don't need to be lied to."

"I'm not lying…" he took a shaky breath. "You're the one who's lying." a sob escaped at that. Al said the same thing.

"Then let me." the pain in his eyes was too much. That hurt worse than anything. It sucked every speck of air in my lungs. I turned and ran. Slamming the elevator, it opened seconds later. I can't. I can't be near him. If I don't get out of here I'm going to break. I'll listen to the voice. The one that's screaming at me. Screaming to run into his arms. Scream to him and the rest of the world that I am his. That I'm cold, because he took my heart all those years ago. Arriving on the fourth floor, I panicked further. Air. Real air. The roof. Taking the stairs 2 at a time. I made it. The sky was clear but all the stars were washed away by the bright lights of the capitol. The bright, fake, gaudy lights of these ignorant, spoiled, selfish people. Who polish over imperfections, and worry about the latest fashion craze. The thoughts kept coming, and they wouldn't stop. Two big arms wrapped around me. Al. I screamed and screamed into his chest. Until I couldn't speak. I screamed. Until I had nothing left. He scooped me up and took me to our floor. Laying me in his bed and holding me close. Like a big brother always should when his sister is scared. Or hurt. Or heartbroken. I'm all of those things and so much more…. Surprisingly, sleep captured me minutes later. Al's steady heartbeat lulled me to sleep. I was too tired to care that this may be the last time I get to hear it.

Finnick's POV

After the elevator doors shut I threw the knife in my hand across the room. It imbedded itself into the wall. Five inches from the hilt. I wanted to scream. To fight. To kill something. To kill Snow, for what he's done to me. What he's going to do to Mar…. It's too much. I've been missing her for the last two years and she's right in front of me. But I can't have her. She'll never be mine. The elevator door dinged as it opened. I tried collecting myself before I turned. Luckily it was Mags. She wrapped her frail arms around me and I let loose. I cried like I hadn't since my parents were killed...

Mags managed to get me cleaned up enough to head upstairs. "How did you know I was here?" I asked as we rode up.

"Murr cumin da purment cryn. Al folloo er. I com ere fur ooo." nodding. The twisted feeling in my gut grew a fraction. "commn Finn emme mak ooo summ teee."

"That would be great Mags thanks.." she sent me a toothless grin and went to work. I slumped against the counter. Nursing the concoction once it was handed to me. It started to work almost instantly. I stumbled into my room. Downing the rest of the drink I dropped the cup and crawled under the covers. At least I wouldn't have any dreams tonight. Mags tea was a powerful sedative.

I woke up the next morning at around 11 am. Walking into the living room after a quick shower I saw Mags and Euripides waiting for me.

"Ooo mornN subsign"

"Morning Mags, Euripides."

"Late night?"

"I couldn't sleep. I had some tea and it knocked me out." I explained to Euripides. Why I felt the need I don't know. Grabbing the coffee and sugar i started to fill my cup.

"Well, we've been approached by several mentors who want to ally with Mar and Al." groaning I nodded.

"They aren't going to do allies."

"Allies mean sponsors Finnick." Euripides clucked while ruffling his newspaper.

"I went it alone in there. I survived." Euripides huffed.

"You are charming and pleasant Finnick. SHE is angry, rude and awful."

"She enters the arena in two days. And unlike most tributes, she knows what's waiting in there. Not glory. Not riches. It will be agony, pain and death." I'm staring down at the table. "On top of that she found out that her older brother is dying. If you haven't picked up on it already, they are very close. He is the only one who she lets take care of her." the bitter taste in my mouth is growing. "He has also fathered a child, who will never know him." i looked Euripides in the eye anger radiating from every pore. "Mar blames herself."

"That's ridiculous! She couldn't stop any of that."

"That doesn't matter." I slammed my cup onto the table. "Not to her! She knows she's trapped with no way out Euripides. Tell me why she should be kind and gracious when the only thing waiting for her outside the ring is nightmares, guilt and prostitution!" I leaned over the table towards Euripides, who was shaking in his over sequined pants. He was as flaky and ignorant as most Capitolites. Running a hand down my face and slumping down into my chair, I decided it was pointless to scream at the escort. He was clueless, while that was a crime. Shouting would do nothing to help the situation. "Are they at training?"

"S" Mags murmured. A gentle wrinkled hand squeezing my shoulder.

"Good, thanks Mags." I started looking for mail, to see if I had been scheduled for any clients today. Nothing so far, maybe today wouldn't suck. Two peacekeepers walked through the door. They were here for me. With a groan I got up and followed. This is what she has to look forward to… I almost wish she would lose…. "Give me 10 minutes to shower." they nodded curtly. I wasn't going to be here when they finished training. Mar's words echoed in my head. I'd lined up a few sponsors for Mar and Al. It didn't feel like enough though. Nothing felt like enough. Nothing would save Al. That's what she really needed. "I'm going to approach more sponsors today. I'll be out late. Make sure she eats" Mags nodded sadly. After a shower and another cup of coffee I headed out into the Lion's den.

Mar's POV

We took it easy again at training. Tomorrow were the evaluations. I tried thinking of what I was going to do. To be different. I couldn't talk much. What I really wanted to show them was my strength. Or I could completely flop and take everyone by surprise in the games. When we finished training, Finnick wasn't there.

"meebins" was all Mags had to say. I nodded.

"I want to show them my hand to hand skills..." I wheezed out at dinner.

"They should have a few trainers there. I'll ask around to make sure." Euripides was being nice… _that's different._

"...Thanks."

"Al what are you planning on showing them?" the blue man turned continuing a civil conversation.

"Trident, sword, speed."

"Do you have any other plans Marjorie?"

"Yeah, agility. If they have a whip I'll use that as well."

"A whip, that's an unexpected weapon."

"Underrated as well. Mar uses that thing like an angel."

"How did you learn?"

"Taught myself." – God I love toast - The blue man was still staring at me. – Oh right, I was actually speaking to him - "I don't sleep. I train at night. 26 other kids to look out for. I was always planning on going into the games at some point." Taking another bite from my toast. His eyes were still glued to my grain munching form. Looking up at our escort I answered his question before he asked "better me then them"

"Quite the martyr aren't you."

"Nope." I grabbed another roll. "Just a stubborn girl with no self worth willing to do anything for the people she loves." dinner was quiet after that. Finnick didn't come back, and we hadn't set up plans for training. I could use a break. Cella had drawn me a bath with salts and other Capitol stuff. She urged me into the tub, and I complied. Climbing into my massive personal tub I let the hot water relax my muscles. Cella was right. The waters helped. My aches and pains melted away. I wouldn't be stiff tomorrow for the assessment. The scents lulled me nearly to sleep. Cella got me out and dried me off. Leading me to my bed then leaving me to sleep. I murmured a soft thank you as she left.

Waking up at five actually somewhat alert was a surprise. The whole apartment was still dark. Making my way to the living room I decided to stretch out the rest of my limbs. An hour or so later Al joined me. By seven everyone was up and seated at the table for breakfast.

"I've spoken with the Gamemakers Marjorie. They will have a trainer for you to fight." Euripides broke the silence. I nodded towards him.

"Thanks." following up with a small smile. One was returned to me. Finnick didn't speak. Al and the others made idle chat. Soon enough it was time to go down.

"This is going to take all day." Finnick spoke for the first time this morning. "Luckily you guys will go soon enough that the game makers will still be paying attention. Give them something to remember."

"We will." Al answered for us. A Peacekeeper lead us to the waiting room. A few of the other tributes were making small talk. No one was stupid enough to bother with us. We each had 20 minutes to display our skills. That meant a two hour wait before we could go in. Al was first. Which left me alone for 20 minutes. I just wanted to get this over with…

"Marjorie Scur" Finally.

"Good luck Four!" The guy from Six called out. I scowled and ignored him. Entering the room I thought I'd see Al, but he wasn't there. I walked forward. Bowing respectfully for the gamemakers

"Marjorie Scur. District Four." They turned their attention to me with interest. I hate being watched like this. It might save your life. Suck it up. I started with the machete in the simulator. Turning the setting up to difficult I cut through the fake attackers one by one. After 5 minutes I'd finished with them. Breathing heavily. I took a running start and launched myself at the rope course. I planned on finishing with hand to hand combat. Just like Euripides stated there were two Peacekeepers stationed in the room. I looked to the Gamemakers. "If you would indulge me, I'd like to exhibit my hand to hand combat skills. But... I will need a partner." The Gamemaker signaled one of the Peacekeepers to come forward. They left their armor on. Good. He or she started to take off their baton. "Keep it." I breathed softly. Without warning the Peacekeeper lunged forward, baton in hand. Good. Showtime. The guy was quick. But I was faster. He or she was tight, trained well. But I soon found a flaw in their style. They reached out to strike me with the baton. I ducked quickly and jabbed their side fiercely. They brought their arm back, another duck and I landed a blow to their stomach. Surprised by the force the Peacekeeper stumbled back. I took that moment to drop down swiping their feet from under them. It was a dance now. Both of us with a fierce desire to win. In the struggle the Peacekeeper managed to get behind me and put me in a headlock. Perfect. I launched my head back, hearing a crack behind their mask. Wasting no time I launched myself at their arm. Forcing it behind their back, a kick to the back of their knees brought them down. Just like I had with Finnick. I grabbed the top of their head and below their chin. With half a movement I could snap their neck. The room was silent. I think they were waiting to see if I actually killed this person. That wouldn't end well for me. I stepped away breathing heavily. Turning towards the Gamemakers I bowed. "Thank you for your time." Each man and woman stared at me with wide eyes. I turned to the Peacekeeper. "Thanks for your help. Sorry if I hurt you badly." My apology was soft, I don't know if the Gamemakers heard me or not. Head held high I walked from the room, panting slightly from the strenuous activity.

I limped into our apartment. Al wasn't anywhere in sight. Everyone else was there.

"How'd it go?"

"Good I think." I managed to breathe out. "I kicked a Peacekeeper's ass." Euripides paled at that.

"You did what?!"

"Hand to hand combat Deez. They were my only option. The Gamemakers gave me permission." I slumped onto a couch. "I'm not going to just attack a Peacekeeper. I'm not stupid." My breathing was starting to calm down now that I wasn't standing. "It was a good fight too."

"You are by far the craziest tribute I've ever met." Aralia commented after a pause. I lifted my head to look at her.

"Thanks" I answered with a large smile. That made her and Mags laugh. Finnick was quiet still. I didn't expect anything different. After a few minutes of resting Euripides spoke up.

"For god sakes woman, you smell horrid. Go shower!" I laughed at that. Dragging myself off of the couch I obliged. He was telling the truth after all. I stumbled towards my room. An actual smile on my face.

Finnick's POV

After Mar left the room Euripides turned to us and breathed. "You don't think she really fought a Peacekeeper? Do you?"

"Yeah, I'm pretty sure she did." I muttered. She took down a Peacekeeper.

"That's unbelievable…"

"With Mar you have to expect the unexpected." I'd been out all night the night before. Everything she'd said the other night was absolutely true. How she knew her fate and accepted it was beyond me.

Mar didn't come around until dinner. Idle chat was made. It was almost pleasant. But with the scoring happening at 7, it was hard to be. We sat down on the couches. Mar and Al on their own two seater. They held hands. I wanted to be the one holding her hand. I know he doesn't love her like I do. But she let him in. Caesar Flickerman appeared on the screen and the program began.

"Daniel Greer of District one with a score of 10." The cocky son of a bitch's face was smirking on the screen as a 10 orbited his face. "Devi Harper of District one with a score of 10." It continued on. The tributes from two got 10s as well.

"10 flush career pack. They're going to be dangerous." Aralia commented as the scores for the tributes from three were announced. Both rewarded with sevens.

"Alnus Isaar of District four. With a score of… 10." everyone cheered. Mar sent a smile Al's way. He seemed surprised. "Marjorie Scur" we all turned back to the screen. "With a score of… 11." Mar's jaw dropped as everyone erupted in joyful sounds. She sat there shell shocked. I looked at her worriedly. It was a double edge sword. The sponsors would flood in. But she just rose on everyone's kill list.

"Mar that's so wonderful! You must have been amazing!" The others showered her with compliments as Al smiled down at her with pride. The program stayed on but no one really was paying attention anymore. She made eye contact with me. She could see my hesitation. Her smile fell slightly. She could tell. That score wasn't a very good thing.

"Just like you Finnick! Oh this is so wonderful! District Four is a force to be reckoned with!" Euripides clucked on. They proposed a toast. But I didn't join in. I kept my eyes on Mar as she was congratulated repeatedly.

"I just made it to the top of everyone's kill list didn't I?" The joy in the room stopped in the blink of an eye.

"Yeah you did." Clearing my throat I continued. "But the sponsors are going to love you. Everyone is going to be curious. You'll have the attention of everyone in Panem."

"That isn't a good thing." she murmured.

"Well let's get you two to bed. The interviews are tomorrow. And we'll be training all day getting you prepped." Euripides chirped. Mar and Al nodded. Al helped her up and took her to her room. "Oh everyone is going to love her." Euripides cooed.

"You changed your tune pretty quickly." My voice was low and hard. I sent a stern look. He withdrew slightly. Stuttering he managed to get out.

"I.. I listened to what you said… she's a strong girl." that's the damn truth. Everyone went their separate ways. I stayed in the living room and poured myself a drink for the first time in a few months. I heard someone come in. They were quiet. A normal person would have missed it. I stopped being normal a while ago though. Mar was standing in the doorway. She shuffled awkwardly. Her hair was down and a mess. She was wearing tight sleep pants and a baggy shirt. I'd give anything to be able to see her in that every day. Just... Stunning.

"I… I can't sleep…"

"Top shelf, blue tin. It's tea. Drink it in your room" I nodded towards her. She nodded in thanks. She was too short to get the tin on her own. Without hesitation she leapt onto the counter to grab it. I smirked she's always been determined. She made her cup of tea. Me watching her all the while.

"What is it you need to say Finnick?" Her voice was even. Back was still to me. _So so many things.._ Downing the rest of my whisky. I set the glass down.

"Nothing you want to hear." I can't take being in the same room as her. It hurts too much. I wonder if she even cares.

Mar's POV

Finnick walked from the room. Tears pouring down my face. At least I wasn't sobbing. Taking my tea I went to my room and downed the warm beverage. Interviews tomorrow. Gotta find some way to make the people of Panem love me…

At 7 am Euripides barged into my room followed by my stylist team. I was barely out of bed before they stripped me down and forced me into the shower.

"Big day today. We've got a lot of work to do. So we're starting bright and early." He droned on and I glared at him with every ounce of anger I held.

"I really want to hurt you right now…"

"Tut tut tut dear, we don't have time for that. Now let's go!" The morning was a whirlwind of attacks and torture.

"You just did this shit 4 days ago."

"Beauty is pain Marjorie. Beauty is pain." My male stylist coed. I'd learned his name was Valor. Who names their kid that? _Someone from the capitol obviously_.

"You're all sadists." I muttered. They either didn't hear me or ignored me. After I was stripped of all hair… again. I was sent off to practice walking in heels. Acting like a lady. It wasn't as hard as most people thought it would be. I used to have class. I think everyone was surprised at my grace and poise. I didn't know whether to laugh or be insulted by their shocked faces. Next we ran over interview questions. Al and I argued over what to talk about. After about 45 minutes he agreed to leave out Kari. I was thankful for that. We were going to wing it for the most part. But Ruddy was bound to come up. Three hours before the Interview my prep team whisked me away again. I was slathered in lotions and potions and god knows what else. For three Capitolites they were impressively forceful. They are trying to help. They are trying to help. They are trying to help. That's my mantra for today. Finally I was ready to see Aralia.

"I have never been happier to see you." I breathed finally. She sent me a smile.

"They still pissed at you?"

"I'm thinking yes."

"Well at least they did their jobs this time." I laughed along with her. "Alright. You know the drill. Eyes closed. And I don't give a shit about your ' _plans'_ you're stuck with mine"

"I guess I'll give you this one…" sighing dramatically as I shut my eyes. The four of them bustled around I felt multiple pieces of fabric being draped around me. They clipped on jewelry. Brushed on make-up. Slipped me into more heals. After an agonizing wait Aurelia finally helped me down. Leading me to what I assumed was the mirror. "Okay, you can open them now." The woman staring back at me was the picture of perfection. My eyes were lined with golden eyeliner. Hair curled into a stunning bun. Every one of my auburn strands shown like a gem under the lighting. There was also glitter on my chest and arms. Then the dress… it was the softest gray blue. Sleeveless, I looked like a goddess. Like royalty. The chest swept down, showing enough cleavage but not so much that I looked trashy. There was a gold and silver jeweled belt. Pieces of mother of pearl were sewn in. The skirt floated around me. A sultry slit in the skirt allowed for me to actually walk. Clipped on my shoulders was a lovely cape. It dipped and caused a slight train behind me. I… there weren't words… "Well do you like it?" Aralia asked. I realized I hadn't answered her. I couldn't manage to speak. "Speechless?" I gave her a nod. "Good." her face brightened up. "You are without a doubt the most beautiful tribute I've had the pleasure of dressing. Now, let's go show the world." I nodded numbly. Aralia helped walk me back stage. The door shut behind me. And everyone's eyes were on me again. I looked for Al, but found Finnick instead. His jaw had hit the floor. Along with many others. He looked at me like I was the most beautiful creation on this earth. He snapped out of his trance when Mags nudged him. Finn walked my way and offered me his arm.

"You look…" He swallowed. "I don't think there's a word that comes close…." I looked down a bit. Shrinking under his gaze.

"Thank you..." He cleared his throat.

"Right, come on over. Al should be here soon." as he said that Al walked out. Dressed in a gray baggy shirt. It opened to show his chest hair. He stopped in his tracks when he saw me. The biggest smile I've ever seen on his face. He was beaming with pride. I couldn't help but smile back.

"You look amazing Mar." He smiled taking my hands. "We'll be beating the guys off with a stick." I smiled back softly. I only wanted one guy, and he was to my left.

"Alright guys, remember the plan."

"Tributes, line up." the stage manager called out. Al led me over. Making sure I didn't fall on my face. He knows me so well. As we waited for our turn Al's hand never left mine. I hate attention. I've hated it for years. It never brings anything but trouble. The tribute from three had just finished up.

"Showtime." Al breathed. I nodded firmly. Showtime.

"Ladies and gentlemen! The stormy sweetheart from District four! Marjorie Scur!" Caesar's introduction I felt a shove from behind. The lights of the stage were blinding. I gave a soft smile. I couldn't wear a real one. I wasn't happy to be here. "My dear you look gorgeous. Doesn't she folks?" the audience roared louder. I gave a humble bow in thanks. "Take a seat, my dear. Please!" we both rested into the chairs. Tucking my left foot behind my right ankle, surprising myself with how graceful I was. Folding my hands in my lap I turned to Caesar. "So my dear! We are all dying to know. How did you manage a score of 11? The last tribute to score that high was our own Finnick Odair." _he isn't yours_. "Did Finnick have a hand in that." with what I hoped was an amusing smile I turned to Caesar.

"It's hard not to excel under Finnick's expert guidance." the crowd loved that.

"Ha ha! I couldn't agree more he's a wonderful man!"

"Without question." i didn't hesitate with my response.

"So, Marjorie my dear, is there anyone special waiting for you back home?"

"Yes, I have 25 people waiting for me actually."

"That's quite a group!"

"Us orphans stick together." sending a wink Caesar's way, the audience laughed.

"I meant is there a special man in your life. A beautiful woman such as yourself must turn a lot of heads. You've certainly captivated everyone here in the capitol! Don't you agree?" the crowd roared again. How do I answer this? The truth? With a nervous laugh I go for it.

"That's honestly a surprise. I couldn't tell you if I turn heads or not. With all of the younger kids to care for, I don't have time for distractions."

"Oh my dear, there must be someone."

"There was... " I breathed looking out at the crowd. My eyes find Finnick in seconds.

"Was..? Please go on." with a forced smile I turned towards Caesar.

"I lost him when we were ten. There was a fire…" tearing up a touch. "Even though we were only children, I haven't found a reason to try again."

"Well my dear, I'm sure love will find you someday." I glanced at Finnick again. It already has...

"One more thing before we let you go my dear. I know we are all dying to know about your reaping. How you volunteered for that girl."

"Ruddy, she's my best friend. More of a sister actually..." the atmosphere changed. Am I really doing this?

"You volunteered to protect her. that is so sweet."

"Thank you..." I paused. "I couldn't let her go in there…." trying to swallow the lump in my throat. _Please don't be mad at me Ruddy.._. "She's pregnant." _play it up Mar_. The crowd was taken by surprise, all of them hanging on my every word. "We just found out two days before the reaping. That's why I volunteered. I couldn't let her go into the arena. I mean, I would have volunteered for her regardless. I love her to pieces. But still, what kind of monster lets a _pregnant_ woman go into the games?" the crowd gasped and murmured in agreement.

"I couldn't agree more. That was such a selfless thing you've done for your friend." emotions were brewing

"The worst part is... She had to tell Al as we were leaving for the capitol." the words spilled out before I could catch them...

"Al?... Your District partner?"

"Yes." the crowd grew quiet.

"Is he..?"

"The father? Yes." a wave of shocked sounds rolled thru the crowd. Caesar's eyes were wide. I continued "Oh Caesar they are the most beautiful couple. They've been in love for years. The kind of love everyone dreams about. It's just…so..." my eyes were watering. Taking a deep breathe I collected myself again. "One of us is going home. You'll be seeing one of us again soon. I promise you that. And I never break my promises." fiery resolve ended the interview.

"Brave words from a brave young woman… ladies and gentlemen Marjorie Scur from District Four!" many of the Capitolites were crying. Standing and applauding my bravery. I wasn't brave. I just pimped my personal life to gain sponsors. I felt disgusting. It was all the truth. But absolutely none of their business. I sent the crowd a grateful nod then returned to Al's side behind the stage.

"I feel disgusting." i breathed to him

"You did great Mar. I'm not mad. She shouldn't be either."

"I'm mad…"

"When aren't you mad?" he nudged my side playfully. Caesar started to announce Al he whispered "Showtime." before heading out to the sea of lights and cameras. The stagehand herded me further away from the stage. Finnick was standing with Mags near a monitor. I stayed a few feet away. Not knowing if I wanted to listen.

"So Alnus,"

"Al please, we're all friends here Caesar." the crowd chuckled with Al's comment.

"Alright Al. I want to ask you something. I'm sure you heard Marjorie's interview."

"Yeah, the happy news." his smile was more of a grimace.

"She promised one of you would be coming back. How do you feel about that?"

"Well…" Al paused. "She's half right."

"Half right? How so?"

"One of us is going to be coming back." Al paused and looked at the audience "It's going to be her." gasps went through the crowd.

"But Al, the… the baby…" he started getting choked up.

"I know." Al sent a pained smile to Caesar. "But you don't know Mar like I do. She's the strongest person I've ever met. She's the perfect example of a true survivor."

"No offense to Mar at all, but a strong guy like you? You're not someone for the competition to overlook."

"Everyone always thinks that." he laughed. "That I've been protecting and providing for everyone at home." Al looked to Caesar. "It's been all her Caesar. She sacrificed school so she could take care of the younger kids. She works at least four jobs at all times to keep food on the table. Anytime anyone needs her, she's just there. It's like a sixth sense. She just knows." Al took a breath. "She is an amazing woman. I am so proud to call her my little sister." the crowd was in tears. Caesar was speechless. Al took the opportunity to put the icing on the cake. "You know what older brothers do don't you Caesar?" he looked stunned. "They protect their little sisters no matter what." the buzzer sounded. The crowd was in tears, many sobbing out right. The applause roared for Al as he stood up. Bowing slightly for the audience. Al came over to our little group. "Can we go?" I couldn't look at him. It's just so real. It's too real. Al's arm wrapped around my waist as he guided us towards the lift. I was in tears.

"This is really happening." I whispered. "We are really losing you…"

"I'm dead either way Mar. Remember that. Okay?" tears so many fucking tears. Grabbing my perfectly manicured hair in agony.

"I keep fucking crying!"

"I know, at least they put on waterproof eye goop this time. You looked terrifying last time. Like you were melting." Letting out a choked laugh I buried my head into his chest.

"Not funny."

"Then why are you smiling?"

"I'm not smiling." I murmured into his chest. We were already in the apartment by the time I stepped away from him. Finnick walked up to each of us.

"This is special tea that Mags grows back home. It will help you sleep tonight. You both need to rest you've got a big day tomorrow." gently handing us each a cup. I started to bring it to my lips. "Wait to drink it till you've showered. It'll really knock you out." he offered a soft smile. Al nodded.

"I'm already tired. Think I'll head off." he kissed my forehead "see you in the morning Mar." my voice started failing me. So I sent him a nod instead. Mags follows him to her room after giving me a soft hug. I'm breaking, I know it. Then again I have been all week.

"Thanks for everything Sharkfin" I managed. He took the cup setting it on the table and wrapped me up in one fluid motion. We didn't speak. After a few minutes he pulled away. His hand resting on my cheek, brushing away more traitorous tears. They refused to stop falling.

"Come back to me Marmaid." he whispered the same words I'd begged him when he was leaving.

"I'll try." he was holding back, clearly he wanted to kiss me again. I wanted him to. _I wanted him to_. To hold me close all night promising me everything would be okay. Lying to me that we would be together after this. It would hurt us both though. So I pulled away before our self-control broke. "Night Fin" Turning I picked up the tea and went to wash the crap off of my face. After five minutes I downed the tea, crawled into the bed. Last thoughts being that I was going into the games tomorrow…


	3. Making Landfall

Waking up the next morning was the worst feeling in the world. People were going to die today. Al could die today... A soft knock came. Mags was standing at the door. A sad gentle smile on her face. I didn't bother changing out of my sleep clothes. I'd be changing into my uniform soon enough. Too soon... Mags wrapped her frail arm around my waist. Leading me to the dining room. Al was already at the table. He got up giving me a big smile. "Don't smile. Today isn't a day for smiles Al." He pulled away.

"I always smile when I see you Mar." Tears started to pool again.

"Don't fucking start that shit… I don't want to cry today too god dammit."

"Too late." Al laughed. A few tears slipping down his cheeks too. Euripides was in tears. I brushed mine away.

"Could you stop looking at us like we're going to die?" I snapped.

"They're looking at me like that Mar, not you." I stifled a sob.

"For fuck sake." I breathed. "Not fucking helping here Alnus."

"I don't think anything's gonna really help this Mar…" Valor and Aralia were both at the table with tears in their eyes. Finnick kept his eyes on me most of breakfast. Not bothering to hide his staring. Finally I'd had enough. I slammed my hands on the table.

"Is there something you need to say Odair?!" My eyes were brimming again wonder if my eyes held as many emotions as his were. Fear, worry, love. His eyes were screaming with love. I looked away before I did something stupid, like confess my undying love at the breakfast table. "Stop it Odair." I snapped. "You feel that because I might die." I snapped with anger. "If you've had the last _6 years_ to find me. If that's how you really felt, you would have found me sooner. Not waited until I was being thrown into the damn arena." His Adam's apple was bobbing as he tried to swallow. The words were getting stuck in his throat.

"I was…"

"Protecting me?" I scoffed. "Even before the games Fin? Was your Dad going to beat me for dragging your social status so low? That's not the man _I_ remember." Tears were brimming in his eyes. I have to hurt him. It'll make this easier. I snapped my head towards Euripides "How much time do we have?"

"Mar... you don't have to be so..." I glared at Al, shutting him up effectively.

"A-a-a-bout an hh-hour." I nodded getting up from the table.

"Mar…" Al called after me but I didn't listen. I heard him curse under his breath. I managed to slam my door before Al shoved it open. "What the _hell_ is wrong with you?!"

"Leave it alone Al."

"He wants to be there for you Mar! It's what you've wanted for the last 6 years! Or did you forget that!"

"God dammit Al. He wants that because he thinks I'm going to die. Because he thinks this will be his last chance. I don't want to be loved like that Al. I deserve better than that. He... He doesn't even _know_ me anymore Al!"

"How could he if you won't let him in?!"

"Why is this so important to you? We have more important things to deal with!"

"This is important! Dammit Mar! I _need_ to know someone is going to take care of you!"

"I don't need to be taken care of Al! I am perfectly capable."

"Yes you are. But you REFUSE to do it! You are so busy saving everyone else that you ignore your needs completely!"

"They need it more!"

" _You_ have needs too!"

"I'll have Dare when I get home."

"Dedreick is _not_ going to be able to help you with this. You _know_ that."

"I'll manage."

" _God dammit Mar_."

"I'm a survivor remember? That's _all_ I know how to do. I won't be happy, but dammit _I'll survive_."

"Why bother living if you aren't going to be happy."

"I have people who need me Al."

"And when they don't? That day's gonna happen Mar. When everyone has grown up. Moved on. Had their own lives. _What then?_ " My eyes teared up. _What then? Well Al I'll be useless._

"I don't know." I took a deep breath. My body was vibrating. My emotions changing so rapidly it was hard to pinpoint a solid one. The speed could be why. "I don't know okay? But that's not today. I'll worry about that when the time comes Al."

"He could love you the way you deserve."

"He would. Without a doubt. But it doesn't matter Al. He will always be what I can't have."

"It's time to go…" Finnick had walked in. He didn't make eye contact with either of us. I know he heard me. _God, why does he have to be here? Why does he have to be so close? Why do these games even have to happen? How is any of this justified?!_ Treason

"He could be your strength Mar."

"He's already my biggest weakness. I don't want to give in to the delusion."

"What delusion?!"

"That I am capable of being happy."

"You _deserve_ to be happy Marjorie Louise Scur. More than most."

"Whatever you say…" He left with a frustrated grunt. I was dressed in minutes. _Breathe Mar breathe_.

"You're right." _Finnick_. Tears pricked at my eyes. I thought he walked away. "In a way." he took a deep breath. "I could have found you after the fire. I honestly thought you were dead." _Why won't you just let me pretend to hate you? Why won't you hate me back? It's so much easier that way…_ He took a shuddered breath. "Everything was swept under the rug. I _never_ saw you around."

"The orphanage was on the other side of Four." _Why is he saying this now?_

"I know…" He laughed softly. "The day of my reaping. I saw you. You were back from the dead. I had to get home. I fought through the whole games. To get home to you." _Why are you breaking me like this Finnick? I'm already so broken? Just, stop… please…_ He took a deep breath. "Don't think for a _second_ that I wanted this."

"No one ever would Finnick." I looked at him, tears pouring down my face again. "This is reality Finnick."

"I know." his voice was hard and cold. He stepped forward kissing me for the third time this week. I didn't fight it. I never could. He was my sickness and my cure. Heaven and Hell, in one perfectly sculpted body. Pulling away he rested his forehead on mine again. "You kissed me before my games. It's only fair I get to kiss you now." Lips trembling I breathed him in. When I got out everything would be different. Even more fucked up then it was now. Everyone would know I'm a killer. Al will be dead. I'll be an object of the Captiol. Even more untouchable.

"If there was another way. Another place. I'd let you love me..." I breathed. My heart speaking and my brain screaming to shut up. Finn and I were both gasping. Trying to take control. We were breathing each other in. It wasn't the last time. I was going to live. _Probably_. That thought sent me over the edge. I started to shake. I hate being weak dammit. Wrapping my arms around him and buried my head in his chest. He wrapped his arms and held me close. He started to shake softly too. Complete, that's what I was in this moment. I'd been missing a part of me. It was with _him_. You'd think it would be a wonderful feeling. But it wasn't. Being complete was disappointing. I had to pull away. I'll _always_ be torn from him. No happy ever after... Not for me. Not while we were tools. I think he knew as well as I did. We didn't speak. Couldn't look each other in the eye. Euripides knocked on the wall. Finn and I pulled away. I didn't look at him. Not even a glance. I was already crying. My body felt ice cold without him. Empty. _Because you are…_ "Let's go." I sounded more robotic and cold then I'd ever imagine I could. Time. It's time. I zoned out on the walk down. Barely flinching as the tracker was injected into my arm. I know Al was beside me the whole time. But I was trapped in my head. It was too real. This was really happening. _This is really happening_. Al and I were separated. That snapped me out of my daze. I started fighting against the Peacekeepers.

"Don't Mar. I'll see you soon okay?" I sent him a nod. Eyeing the Peacekeepers. They grabbed my shoulders and forced me to walk away from Al. We entered a room. Aralia was standing in the corner. A sad smile on her face.

"Don't shower Hun. Your uniform is snow gear."

"Frozen waste land?"

"That's my best guess."

"Perfect." I dressed in silence. What can you really say? I was decked out from head to toe.

"One final touch." Aralia murmured. Reaching into her pocket she pulled out a necklace. The shark tooth necklace I gave Finn on his 8th birthday. "This is the first time he's taken it off in 8 years. He's expecting it back. _Preferably soon_." Aralia gave me a sad smile.

"60 seconds to launch." I jumped at the sound. Fear settling in at last.

"That's normal Hun. It's time..." I nodded. It's time. A shuttered breathe left my lungs. Aralia led me to the tube. I turned to look at her. She gave me a big smile. Tears streaming down her face. "I can't have children... I was angry about it for years. Working with the games made me happy I can't have them. But! If I ever had a daughter." Aralia cupped my face. "I hope she'd be _half_ as brave as you." She kissed my forehead the way my Mom always did when I was scared. "Go get them my girl." I nodded. My voice failing.

"10 seconds to launch."

"I'll see you soon." she murmured. Stepping into the tube that would send me to my death. I'm coming home. I felt the shark tooth against my skin. I am coming home. Closing my eyes I imagined Ari. I am coming home. I have to live. I have to live…

Rising up from the tube a bitter wind cut through me like a knife. I was blinded by white. It was everywhere. Frozen wasteland. Fuck. Me. looking around for Al I spotted him. I sent him a nod. One he returned. The countdown started.

10

9

8

' _Get home to Ari'_

7

6

' _You have people to protect'_

5

4

' _You are a survivor.'_

3

2

' _You have to win.'_

1

' _Showtime_.' The other tributes bolted for the cornucopia. Al and I hightailed it in the other direction. It happened every year. The lure of weapons, bringing people to their death. _We are not that stupid._ Screams tore through the frozen air, we kept running. The cold air burned my lungs. The temperature difference was so vast. After a few minutes of running Al was already falling behind. Looking around we were alone.

"Catch your breath. We look okay for now."

"wehh... ne-heed... w-wheah-pp-hunzz." Al wheezed out. I nodded. Looking around. There were some huge evergreens to our left.

"Sit tight, breath. I'll find us something."

"Nohhh Mhaar." Al was gasping for breath.

"I'll be right over there Al. _Breath_." He sent me a weak nod. Luckily the snow lowered one of the branches. It was really heavy. I weighed more than the snow, so I had a better chance of breaking branches off. Grabbing onto the lowest branch I swung myself forward. Wrapping my legs around it, ankles locked together. The snow was getting all over. It was cold. Really really cold. A few of the weaker branches broke as I tugged on them. They were too flimsy to do any damage. Hanging upside down I lost grip on one branch. I swung down. My legs still locked around the tree. I squeaked in surprise. Al jumped up. I laughed. "Oi! I told you to rest!" I have no idea what I looked like. I assume it was like one of the powdered pastries we could never afford at the bakery. "Don't make me come over there Alnus Rickter Inees!" He raised his hands in defeat. I glared for a moment longer. This hanging upside down business was making me dizzy. Shaking excess snow off, I forced my upper body back to the branch. Using my arms I managed to swing myself so I was on top of the tree branch now. " _Whoa, head rush!_ "

"Mhar… Are you.. hokay?"

"I'm fine Al… chill out!"

"Weh are in a whinter whastelhand. Every hounce of m-he is ch-hilled." he snarked back.

"Aren't you glad I made you focus on the survival stuff?"

"Yeah, yeah you're a gehe-ni-hus. Would yhou hurry hup? I'm not feeling grheat about this."

"The bloodbath is still going on. They haven't launched any cannons yet."

*BOOM*

"I stand corrected..." Muttering wislt climbing further up the branch. Once I found side branches that were thick enough to be useful I grabbed them with two hands and jumped down. The momentum of my body weight snapping the wood. I fell into two arms instead of a fluffy snow bank. Three cannons had sounded by this time. " _Oh my hero_." At that he dropped me in the snow. I glared up at him. He was smirking behind his face guard. "You. Are. So. Rude." I huffed. He stood there laughing at me. "Fine _you_ get your own spear, Jerk."

"Sounds g-hood." he took my branch and broke it in half. "Thhanks!"

"God you're lucky I love you." He laughed again.

"Truhust me I knhow. So hhow are we going to sharphen these?"

"They don't need to be sharp, just aerodynamic." He looked my way. "With enough force a wooden spoon could be a weapon."

"Why do you knhow these things?"

"Because you don't bother to pay attention."

"I knhow for a fact no-hun of our training was how to khill people with whooden sphoons." I shrugged.

"We have branches, not wooden spoons." I shook my branch at him for good measure. "I'm a creative and resourceful woman."

"That is the dahamn truth." we both shared a laugh. Looking around there weren't any visible rocks. The tree trunks were relatively thick. I took the face mask down. Biting on the branch. Al looked at me like I was crazy. "I told you to heat more at breakfast." rolling my eyes I lifted my facemask back in place.

"Testing to see how firm it is Al." turning I started towards one of tree trunks. There was a big knob sticking out. That would have to work. "They are frozen solid. The tree trunks should be too. That will have to do for now."

"Aren't you worried about starting a fhire?"

"Fro-zen so-lid Al-nus. We'd be rubbing the wood together for at least a day. I don't plan on staying here that long." Scanning the area I turned from the tree. "We've been here too long anyway. We need to keep moving."

"Alright let's get rubbing." We both looked at each other but let the comment slide. Taking turns, One watching for threats, one trying to sharpen their spear. After about 30 minutes we'd done a semi-decent job. "Good enough?" he'd finally stopped wheezing.

"Yeah... good enough." the wind started to pick up. "Let's find shelter."

"And water." I laughed at that. I grabbed a handful of snow.

"Drink up!" Tossing it in his direction.

"But it's cold!"

"No shit!" I laughed. "Stop complaining and _come on_." I turned. "We need to move…"

Finnick's POV

Mar was joking and smiling in the games. When she was hanging upside down she looked like a white dust bunny. Then threatening Al like that was adorable. I miss her already. The Careers were merciless this year. Maybe it was because Mar was in there, but they seemed more violent. They'd cut down five tributes already. The bloodbath didn't have many bodies but the gory deaths hopefully satisfied the Capitol bloodlust. I don't need muts going in there on the first day. The video cut to the blood covered snow. The Careers were stationed at the cornucopia, as they did almost every year. An alliance of the tributes from 7, 8 and 9 had formed. Strength in numbers was smart. The camera cut to them as they regrouped. Soon Caesar's voice cut over the audio talking about what we just saw. The alliances forming. And they played the clip of Mar hanging from the tree again.

"She is either very brave or very foolish to act like that in the games." Beetee walked over to me.

"You have to expect the unexpected with Mar." I smiled softly. "I'm sorry for your loss." he gave a resigned nod.

"There's only one survivor…" he trailed off. I gave his shoulder a gentle squeeze. "Best luck to your tributes Finnick."

"Thank you Beetee." He escorted Wires from the room. Their tributes hadn't made it 10 minutes. It's a hard thing to watch. At least for anyone with a conscious. Caesar finished talking and they cut to the career group.

"Alright, let's rest up. I want that bitch from Four's head on my spear by sunset tomorrow." The punk from one stated. It made me tense.

"Agreed she's our biggest threat."

" _Duh_ that's why I said it."

" _Uh oh_ … power struggle between the Careers." Caesar commented as the two boys started to bicker. "It looks to be an exciting games already! With two major alliances how are the tributes going to react?" he kept talking. I wasn't listening though. I was looking for Mar to pop up on the screen. If I saw her, I knew she was safe…

"Finnick, I never knew your tribute was so entertaining." A slender arm traced my shoulders. "Resourceful too. Though I doubt those branches will do them much good."

"I wouldn't be so quick to judge with Mar. She's unpredictable to say the least." I smiled back at the screen. "You have to expect the unexpected with her." The capitol woman giggled.

"Well I certainly look forward to seeing more of her… _and you_. I'd love to be her sponsor. Let me know if she needs anything alright?"

"I will, thank you."

"Oh no mister Odair." she slipped a piece of paper into my shirt pocket. " _Thank you_." I kept the smile on my face as she walked away. _Do they ever get tired of this?_ I watched the games. Not wanting to know when I'd be dragged away. Terrified something might happen and I won't be there to help her. Again...

After 20 minutes and _three_ propositions I decided I should work out a schedule for all of the clients. Good news? Money was rolling in. I'd have enough for two real spears soon. I didn't know what would be better. Weapons, food, or blankets. If this kept up there'd be enough money for all of that and more. Bad news? I was going to be gone for hours at best. Anything could happen in five minutes. Hours…? Who knows? She's my Marmaid… _No she's not._ She would be. _But she won't be. Not as long as this is reality._ Things can change. I need things to change.

"You know, staring at the screen isn't going to keep her alive Finnick." Aralia appeared out of nowhere. I jumped and scowled. "I know how much she means to you. I'll keep watch okay? You've got work to do."

"If something happens and I'm not here…"

"I'll take care of it." Her voice was steely and left no room for question. "That is an amazing girl in there Finnick. Go take care of your business." Her voice quieted "Don't piss them off. She doesn't need Snow as an enemy." We both know she's right.

"I hate leaving her."

"You don't have a choice. For once this shit is helping her." Aralia pushed me away. " _Go_ " _Please don't die on me Mar…_

Al's POV

We were trudging through the snow for at least an hour. I think… The sun position had changed considerably. Clouds were coming in and the wind was picking up. We still hadn't found any food or any shelter. Walking was a chore. The snow was either frozen over or soft and fluffy. You never knew what to expect. We hadn't fallen into anything, _yet_. A lovely cracking sound broke the silence as I felt myself sinking again. Only this time it was a good 5 feet and I hit something _hard. Perfect timing…_

"AL!?" groaning in response. _Just had to think it didn't you Inees?_ I looked around. Not much to see. It was a dark cave. Could be filled with monsters and I wouldn't be able to tell. "ALNUS!"

"I'm good Mar. Found us shelter." I tried looking around more.

"Is it safe?"

"No clue, can't see a thing. It's kinda warmer though. Jump down. I'll catch you."

"Spear incoming." I stepped back while she tossed in the spear.

"Come on Mar."

"You better catch me jerk."

"Would you jump already?" She slipped into my arms. Setting her down she turned as well.

"You weren't kidding. It's pitch black down here."

"I know, there could be monsters staring at us from 2 feet away and we'd never know it."

"Yeah, let's not give the Gamemakers any ideas."

"They've already thought about it. Why else would this be here?"

"I'm supposed to be the negative one in this relationship. You're killing my joy." She couldn't see me but I deadpanned at that.

"What joy Mar? We are in the games, 5 people are dead. The Careers are out to kill us both. And we have no real weapons."

"So negative!" she exclaimed. "We have our spears"

" _Branches_."

"We have shelter."

"That could be housing monsters, mutts or who knows what else."

"It's warmer in here."

"I'll give you that one."

"And we are _alive_." She paused. "That's something to be grateful for Al." taking my hand. "Especially in the games. Five families are grieving right now Al. Five lives have been lost."

"And there's 18 more to go before you get to go home Mar." I ran my hand down my face. "Most bloodbaths are a lot bloodier."

"We don't know what happened. It hasn't even been a full 12 hours _yet_."

"Mar, how are you this calm?" I could make out her outline in the dark. "You've been breaking all week. How are you this calm?"

"B-because I want to be. I _need_ to be. There's a storm coming. It's not just from us. Listen to that wind." She took a breath. "Besides, as long as we don't get suffocated from the snow that's probably going to build up this could be a nice little home."

"You're unbelievable."

"Crazy. Not stupid."

"Agree to disagree on that one." She heard me even though I barely spoke about a whisper. I know because a branch hit the side of my head. "OW! I'm your ally here!"

"You're also an ass." She started walking further into the dark. "My eyes are starting to adjust. I'm going to follow the wall. See if there are any surprises."

"Mar…"

"I've got my branch Al, I'll be fine. Or I'll die a horrible death."

"MAR!"

" _What_? I'd rather go down fighting then get torn to pieces in my sleep."

"Could we not talk about you dying? Please?"

"I'm not going to be able to sleep if I don't know what's in here with us."

"You don't sleep."

"Don't badger me with details Al." Throwing my hands in the air I crossed my arms. "Besides, if this is secure we are sitting very pretty."

"Unless we can't find food."

" _Alnus_. I said don't badger me with details. I meant it. Now shut your face hole." She walked further into the dark and what I could see of her outline vanished.

"Mar… I need you to keep talking to me so I know you're safe."

"Great plan, let whatever is in here know we're coming."

"If there is something in here it already knows Mar."

"Oh so now you say 'if' I thought you were sure we were going to die here."

"Marjorie Scur, don't push me right now."

"I'm nowhere _near_ you, how could I push you?"

"Could you drop the annoying littler sister thing?" bringing my hands up to rub my temples. I expected a sassy response. She was full of it apparently. This was the most life she'd shown in months. She was quiet for a while.

"No." There was something else in the silence. "We don't have much time left to do this Al. I don't want to waste it." Her voice quivered a bit. She knows what's going on. She knows what's at stake. She's fighting her inner demons to make sure our time together is something worth remembering. "I figured you didn't want me to be a blubbering mess. _I_ honestly don't want to be." Her voice started echoing a bit. "You know I hate crying." She started to sound closer. After a few minutes I could make out her outline. "No monsters." I grabbed her and pulled her close.

"I love you Mar. You're our little Joy Joy. Wither you like it or not."

"Oh my god all of Panem is watching this Al! Don't call me that!"

"Sorry I forgot."

"Liar."

" _Maybe_." We both laughed a little. I was tired. The games weren't going to be low impact. I knew that going in, but it wore me out more then I expected.

"Lay down Al. It's a dirt floor" She always just knows. It was a hard pack of some soft kind of dirt. Nothing like the sand back home. This stuff wasn't moving at all. A cement floor might be more comfortable. But Ruddy is watching, if they're showing us I need her to know we are okay.

" _Ahh_ home sweet home."

"Nothing like firm granulated sediment to bring you back to happier times."

"Those times were _not_ happy Mar."

"I know, I _was_ there." She chuckled. "How my sarcasm is still lost on you is beyond me."

"You did learn from the best."

"I thought we agreed I wasn't going to cry." She poked me softly. "You know talking about her makes me cry." I watched her silhouette shake slightly. "Lay it down Inees. I'm on first watch." There's no arguing with her when she uses her 'mom' voice.

"Yes _mother_." That earned me another slap with her branch. "Would you stop hitting me with that damn thing?!"

"Would you shut up and rest?!" I snorted in her general direction and laid down. I know she had a triumphant grin on her face. It was dark enough to where I could actually sleep. We were in a hole almost like a tomb. So we were safe, for now. We're in the games… I'll take what I can get.

Aralia's POV

Everyone was settling in for the night. A snow storm had started, it was difficult to see three feet in front of you. The cameras had to stay close to everyone just to be able to show what's happening. The big group from 7, 8 and 9 didn't find great shelter. The tributes from 11 were just building a snow hut. It didn't seem smart to me. Mar and Al were best off. They couldn't see each other but we could see them. The picture wasn't great but they were alive. Al was sleeping while Mar watched the entrance. The Careers were huddling together for warmth, the huge gap in the cornucopia not helping at all. I wanted to send them food and blankets, we had enough money to. But the winds were blowing the few parachutes that had been sent far off course. Plus, there's no way for us to get it in the little hole with them. Snow was starting to build up. God, Finnick must feel awful. The girl he loves is in the games and he can't even watch because he has to go _fuck_ clients. Nothing happened for several hours. Repetitive commentary from Caesar. Mar kept shaking her legs or tapping her arms. She seemed cold. Finnick came rushing in an hour later.

"What happened?"

"They found shelter. Had more adorable sibling banter. Now Al is sleeping and Mar is on watch."

"She's shaking! Why didn't you send her something?!" he stepped towards me, looking more menacing than I've ever witnessed first hand.

"Finnick calm down. The wind is blowing parachutes way off course. She wouldn't get it and someone else might. No one has actually received any gifts okay?" He nodded finally taking in the other screens that showed the near white out conditions. His muscles visibly relaxed. "A lot of people have been commenting on how sweet she is. She's gaining more popularity. It's not even the end of the first day. She's looking like a budding favorite."

"That's… that's good." He breathed. "That's good."

"You really love her huh?" he put his head in his hands and elbows on his knees.

"Objects aren't allowed to love Leah… you know that better than most…" tears pricked his eyes. "But I always have a hard time following the rules…" he sent a half smile my way while watching Mar on the screen.

"Nothing lasts forever Finnick." I gave his shoulder a squeeze before excusing myself. That can be good and it can be bad. This has to change… we just need to wait for the right opportunity.

Finnick's POV

I couldn't help but worry. Mar was constantly moving at least one limb. God she must be freezing. After an hour or so she nudged Al away.

"Mmm, Ruddy, babe let me sleep…" Al rolled over again. A look of pain flashed across Mar's face.

"Al, it's Mar, Ruddy is safe at home." Her voice shook for half a second. "You need to get up and moving. Can't let your heart rate slow too much."

"Right… the games…" he ran a hand down his face. Al got up sitting next to Mar, A few tears were leaking down his face. "I don't want to die Mar…" he finally whispered. "… I want to go home and hold Ruddy and tell her how perfect she is… watch her get fat while our child is growing inside her… I want that more than anything Mar…" his voice started to break. Mar was tearing up she grabbed his hand.

"Then we'll get you home, yeah?"

"Mar… you know that won't do much good. I'm your big brother, it's my job to protect you." She hummed in response. I can't imagine what Mar is going through. "I know you don't need to hear this Mar… but..."

"Keep talking. I'm 99% sure Ruddy is almost fused with the screen back home. I sure as hell would be."

"Mar, it's not fair to you… you're already blaming yourself."

"… What happens, happens Al… You need to get this off your chest."

"That mean you're going to open up too?"

"No probably not." She smirked at him. "I'd prefer my secrets die with me thank you." He let out a rough chuckle. The sat in silence. Until Mar started laughing. Al looked at her like she'd lost her mind. She honestly might have…

"You finally crack their Joy?" she giggled and shook her head.

"I asked you nicely not to call me that Alnus. One more time and I break out your nickname too." She shook her finger at him. "You have been warned."

"Then what's so funny?"

"Do you remember the first time we had to change Ari's diaper?" Al laughed too.

"Yes. How could I ever forget?! That was so nasty! You couldn't even look at her without crying after everything with Kari. And you were the only one who'd _ever_ done it before. But we were trying to be sensitive."

"And you and Dare sucked at sensitive."

"Hey! We were 14 and 12 year old boys, what the hell did we know about babies?! Or crying girls!"

"Absolutely nothing!" Mar laughed, a real laugh, it was such a joyful sound.

"There's that Joy Joy laugh we've been missing." They were both smiling.

"Yeah well I save it up for special occasions."

"God that was a fun day."

"Yeah, you and Rick ended up covered in poop. Ari was balling like crazy and naked. You got sand in her diaper giving her a horrible rash. Then you tried washing her in the ocean!"

"I was 14!"

"And you knew salt water burns!" they kept laughing. "Then she got sunburnt."

"Which is stupid we were only out there 20 minutes, if that."

"She wasn't even a day old!"

"It was a learning experience for everyone." Al laughed. "You had to put everything aside and come save the day."

"Mmm,"

"That's when you really started to. Step up I mean."

"Kari was gone, someone had to do it." She had a sad smile on her face. "Besides, if you recall your beloved wasn't much help either." Al started to laugh again.

"She saw us covered in poop and fainted. Who faints at that?!"

"Rudibecka that's who."

"God I love that woman…"

"Queasy stomach and all." Their laughing died down a bit.

"Thank you…"

"For what?"

"Volunteering." Mar laughed.

"It was always going to happen Al. You're an idiot if you think I'm letting any one of them go in here." Mar rested her head against his shoulder. Al started coughing. Mar got up and grabbed a hand full of snow that had been piling up at the entrance. There was some ice too so she broke that off. "Here." Al kept coughing, his whole body shaking. "Al?" Mar's voice started to shake more. There was blood on his glove. "Shit. Al when did this start happening?" his response was a wheeze. "God damn you. Open." He kept just kept wheezing. She pinched the area behind his jaw causing it to open. The camera zoomed in on his mouth. Blood, a lot of it. " _Shit_." She forced him to bend over. "Come on Al, cough it up." He sounded like a fish out of water. Mar kept coaxing him, after 20 minutes of him retching and gagging he started to breath normally. The frown on Mar's face was set in stone.

"I told you, you're going home Mar. Not. Me."

"Just shut up and eat the damn snow." She turned. "I'm going to go get more. Do. Not. Die."

"N-n-ho pr-promi-s-ses." Mar glared at him while walking backwards. She actually got a fair amount of snow. "H-are you going to kheep watch-hing me?"

"Yes." Was her curt reply. She stomped over the shoved the snow in his face.

"Mmghnhhff!"

"Don't talk with your mouth full it's not atractive." It was Al's turn to glare. There were an echo of laughs around me. Mar paid him no mind and ate her own snow. She had a second ball of snow in her left hand, while she ate out of her right.

"Ma-ugmhfgggf"

"You're welcome no need to thank me." She then patted the top of his head. Al was not amused. "Better?" He looked a lot better. He grumbled. "I'm sorry what was that?"

"God you are a pain in the ass."

"Oh you want more snow? Coming up!"

"I'm fine i don't need more snmmghfggh" Al took a bite from the bit that she had just shoved in his mouth and lunged at her. He rubbed it all over her face. She finally got free.

"That was completely unnecessary!" She was brushing the snow of her face.

"You looked thirsty."

"I am, but shoving snow UP MY NOSE will not remedy that situation."

"I got it up your nose?"

"Yeah a lot." Al laughed.

"That's awesome." She snorted, snow flying out. Then stomped away from Al. "Aww Mar come on, it was only a little fun."

"You are on time out, starting. right. Now."

"Mar I'm a grown man, you can't put me on time out."

" _Challenge accepted"_ she whispered. With the cave they were in it echoed just enough to be creepy. Al couldn't see anything. But we sure could. Mar was circling behind Al. Using stones and roots to misdirect him.

"Mar, this isn't funny." It took him five minutes to get annoyed. She was grinning wide and wicked. Face full of mischief. "Dammit Mar, I'm sorry, okay?" She took that chance to lunge on his back knocking him down.

"You are forgiven" she sang as he groaned in pain.

"And you are the devil." She blew him a kiss he couldn't see. Settling herself down again. Al moved over next to her. She laid her head on his shoulder.

"You love me and you know it."

"Shut up and go to sleep."

"Rude.." was the last thing she mumbled before snuggling a little closer.

"Well the first day concludes. 5 fallen tributes. Two budding alliances and the promise of more excitement tomorrow! Tune in then!" Caesar's usual sign off was heard.

" _Night Marmaid_." Everyone returned to their homes. I made my way to my usual apartment too. Luckily the games were up on every screen in the capitol. I settled on the couch. Shirt and pants off. Just watching her sleep. _This is really creepy._ "I need to know she's safe." I breathed to myself. Turning the volume up as high as it would go. That way if someone screams or makes any sound really, then I'd wake up. I'm just closing my eyes anyway...

"WELL GOOD MORNING AND WELCOME BACK PANEM"

"FUCK!" Caesar's voice blared through every stereo in my apartment.

"WE ARE HERE TO JOIN THE TRUBUTES ON ANOTHER" _What the hell was I thinking!?_ "WE'RE IN THE SECOND DAY" _Where is the damn remote?!_ "AND WHO KNOWS" _Dammit, fucking coffee table!_ "WHAT WILL HAPPEN" _Why do I even have one of these?!_

"AH HA!" The volume was soon a normal level. My ears were ringing. Caesar's voice is not what I want to wake up to. _Mar's voice is what I want to hear._ I've got it bad. What the hell is wrong with me? _She's everything you've ever wanted in a woman?_ We just started talking 5 days ago. "She has me talking to myself, who does that?"

"It looks like the Careers have had an early start." Oh shit. "There haven't been any new developments" _thank god_ "but with the Careers on the move, that could be changing very quickly." Wait? They're on the move? Where are they going? Where's Mar and Al? Are the Careers close?!

"Come on, let's move." Daniel the head career called out.

"Chill out One. We need to pick up tracks first." Mace, the guy from Two cslled out annoyed.

"And make sure we aren't followed." Dalia i think her name is? Also from Two.

"Let them follow us, I'm not afraid of shit." Daniel boasted. Puffing his chest out. _And people call me a peacock._

"Yeah, plus it saves us the trouble of hunting them down." The chick from One added.

"Are you guys planning on moving anytime soon?" Dalia started walking off. The others following. There were small snowflakes falling. The sky was relatively clear. _For now_. The cameras cut from the Careers to that big group, to the few tributes who've gone it alone. They all looked horrible. When Mar showed up on the screen, my lungs started to function properly again. She looked okay. I know she's hungry. She's only on the screen for a few moments before they cut back to the Careers.

"They went this way."

"Who?!"

"Does it really matter?"

"Yeah Dan, we need to kill them all eventually. What's it matter who is next?" Okay, they aren't on Mar's tail. I should have enough time to get to the center with out her getting killed. Okay, let's go.

"You look like shit." Gloss commented as I jogged in to the center.

"Thanks Gloss, great to see you too man."

"Did you _run_ here Odair?" Cashmere joined her brother's side. Flashing my Capitol smile.

"Excuse me, I'm needed." I nod towards Euripides who is waving at me frantically.

"Finnick! Finnick over here!" Jogging over I made it in time for the bickering to start.

"All of Panem heard you , calm the hell down." Aralia growled nursing her coffee.

"Excuse you, but this is important!"

"Morning Euripides, Aralia. Jackson not here yet?"

"Hey Finnick. We were both up late watching to make sure Mar and Al were okay."

"You too?"

"Us too. Here you are Finnick dear. I hope the coffee brightens your morning like you smile brightens the world."

"You're half awake and you still manage a cheesy compliment?" Aralia and Jackson shared a glare.

"It's called being pleasant, you should try it sometime."

"Calm down guys, lets focus on why we're here. How are they?"

"Mar actually slept." Choking on my coffee, not a way to start the morning.

"She.. slept?!"

"Yeah, like an hour. Maybe two?" That made me smile.

"Al?"

"Still alive." Euripides chirped. The blue man was beaming. Looking from each of us expectantly.

"Alright, Why the hell are you so excited?" Jackson asked out of nowhere. Euripides was shocked, usually rude comments were Aralia's thing.

"Well, I've been approached by more sponsors already today."

"It's like 8 am?"

"7:47 am actually."

"Euripides, did you even leave here last night?" The coffee was starting to kick in. _how many shots are in this I wonder._

"No, I have taken a few power naps though!" at this Aralia scoffed. Her scowel deepened, attention flicking to the Capitolite momentarily.

"You don't even _like_ her!"

"Well _Aralia_ , anyone who is important to Finnick is important to _me_ " Euripides ended his speech with extra eye batting. Aralia started coughing, the coughs sounded a lot like ' _stalker_ ' and ' _pedophile_ ' Jackson started patting her back. I held back a laugh.

"I found tracks!"

"Oooh!" Caesar's voice cut over the footage "Looks like Delia is on to something."

"Who's are they?!" Mace and Dalia both looked at Daniel with blank faces.

"They didn't sign their fucking names by the broken branches dumbass!"

"If _she's_ such a _great_ tracker she should know!"

"Ugh. Guys shut up!" Dalia shouted.

"If they hear us coming then we'll have more work to do."

"You are not the leader Devi. _I am_."

"Well _master_ Daniel, may we _please_ continue on?"

" _Quietly."_ Dalia muttered. The two girls started off. Leaving the boys to follow.

"Looks like this year's Careers are have a hard time getting along." The footage cut to Caesar and Claudius.

"I have to agree with the girls though Caesar."

"Oh no doubt, let's check in with the other tributes and see how their morning is developing." They started showing the other large group. They were partially covered in snow. "How interesting that the tributes from Six and Seven have joined forces."

"I agree Caesar. Strength in numbers is smart, until supplies run low."

"I'm more worried about their lack of shelter. They spent all of last night huddled together under a tree."

"Hardly allows protection of the wind."

"Right you are Claudius. I'm sure they are thanking the Gamemakers for this lull in the weather."

"I know I am"

"Oh it looks like the Careers are getting close!" Their commentary died out. The screens focused again on the Careers. _Dammit show Mar…_

"We've been walking for 30 minutes. Where the hell are they?" Daniel complained.

"Excuse me your highness, but tracking is an art, not a science. Besides I told you to be quiet." Dalia didn't turn her head to him. She kept inspecting the tracks. Mace stepped between them, there was another stare down between the boys.

"Back off man." Mace ground out.

"If she'd do her damn job we wouldn't be having this argument."

"She IS doing her job asshole. Keep pushing and you will regret it."

"Is that a threat?!"

"It isn't an invitation!"

"BOYS!" The group from Six and Seven heard Devi scream at the boys. They started to pay attention to their surroundings. We could see they were about 500 yards from the tree where the two districts were hiding.

"We need to go. Now." Arlo stated. He shoved Levane and Richelle to their feet. Roster following suit.

"Shut up!" Dalia shushed. "I hear something." Tree branches were breaking and the tributes grunting as they tried to flee the Careers. "Dammit, they heard you idiots. We need to move!" And the chase began. The cameras were focused on the fear of the hunted and the determination of the hunters. When it came to killing all of the Careers seemed to band together. The tributes all ran in the snow relatively well. I think? I've never had the displeasure of running through 6-7 inches of snow. The two from Seven and the boy from Six had long legs. Allowing them to leap faster. The girl from Six soon fell behind. The others were too preoccupied with their running that they didn't notice their ally had fallen behind. Until the Careers could be heard shouting.

"There they are!"

"Ha ha! Let's do this!" A sickening delight light each of the Career's faces as they circled the girl.

"Dan, throw the spear!"

"Get them!" The leader launched his spear and it managed to nick the girl from Six. She cried out in pain. Eyes wide with fear.

"Don't leave me! Roster! Please!" The group of three looked back but then turned to keep running. With the Careers busy killing her, they had enough time for an escape. Daniel turned and grabbed the spear. "PLEASE!"

"Aww are you scared?"

"Poor little thing."

"We are going to have fun with her."

"Let's give them a good show huh?"

"I want to hear you scream Six." Daniel drove the spear into her leg. The girl was on the ground. Her leg painting the snow red. _Bastards…_ The scream of the girl was horrid. In a moment I tensed. Her wail could be heard across the arena. I started shaking. Trying to blink back the memories from my games. The three tributes who had left the girl to die were shaking. The girl from Seven was crying. The screaming finally stopped after 10 minutes. A slow bloody death. Turning I wanted to be sick. They had sliced her arms and legs. Cutting her clothes off. Multiple stab wounds. Cashmere and Gloss were a few feet away.

"If they hadn't played with her the other three would be dead too right now. Fucking stupid."

"Good show though." Gloss commented. I couldn't look at them. Or the screen. They hadn't shown Mar in a good 30 minutes. She could have died from suffocation or hypothermia.

" _Show Mar dammit_." I muttered at the screen.

"Finnick dear. If she were in trouble, every camera would be on her." Jackson rested a gentle hand on my shoulder. He looked tired. Aralia had disappeared. I must look confused because Jackson spoke again. "She went for a coffee run. Not wanted to listen to… _That_."

"Come on those losers couldn't of gotten far!" Daniel started bounding off through the snow. Devi looked down at the body with something close to pity.

"Sad for her, I thought that guy from her district was in to her."

"Apparently not." Mace commented he and Dalia started to take off after Daniel. Devi stood there for half a moment longer.

"Ugh, move your ass Devi! They are getting further away." Cashmere screamed at the screen. Back in the games her partners screamed something similar.

"And the hunt continues" Caesar's voice started to sound over the audio from the games. The screens split again, showing the Careers and the three tributes they were chasing. To the right you could see Claudius and Caesar commenting more. Going over the details of the death. I tuned out.

"Do you think they need anything?" Jackson spoke up.

"Hmm?"

"Al and Marjorie. Do you think they need something?"

"Have the winds died down?"

"They don't seem horrible." Jackson spoke up.

"I'm sure they are hungry."

"Will they even hear the parachute land from inside their cave?" Aralia asked. Eyes also glued to the screen. "Besides, they need real weapons. We don't have enough for two spears yet. We're really close though." Raising an eyebrow her way she ignored the look. "With real weapons they could hunt for themselves."

"Are there even any animals in the games?" Jackson murmured.

"I haven't seen any." Taking another drink of coffee. It was quiet for a beat or two when Aralia suddenly gasped. Nothing was happening on the screens. _What is she worried about?_

"Oh god, you don't think they'll try starving them out do you?" My face paled along with Jackson's at Aralia's comment. _Oh god no._

"T-the-they can't." I started to shake my head. "The-here has to be food in the arena…." _Dammit why would she say that?_ "I'm going to get them food." Turning. Jackson grabbed my arm.

"Finnick, we don't know what's going on right now. They could be eating something right now and we wouldn't know 'cause the cameras are focused on the Careers. We need to wait and see." This is driving me crazy. I'd never wish this on anyone. Mar could be dead in seconds. Seconds. I just. I need to see her. I need her to come home dammit.

Aralia's POV

Day 2 concluded. Next to no money came in. Mar was on the screen all of 15 minutes. Finnick is losing his shit. We had to drag him from the Tribute Center and take him home. He was starting to talk to himself more. Once we got him home he's screaming at the screen or muttering to himself. It wasn't good for his image. He didn't sleep that entire night. Jackson and I took turns watching him. We had to call Mags in the middle of the night just to get him to eat. He isn't even listening to her. Another tribute, the guy from Ten, was killed by the careers. Another bloody death. How those people can live with themselves is beyond me. Seven down, 17 to go. Finnick is sitting 2 feet from the screen currently. God Mar needs to get home soon. I don't think he's going to make it if she doesn't. Where did these feelings come from? It's creepy. Out of nowhere he's madly in love with this girl who he hasn't spoken to in years. According to Mags he goes through phases where he can't sleep. But this is the worst she's seen him since the games. He's completely checked out.

"Good morning Panem! Caesar signed on with his usual greeting. Finnick was rocking back and forth.

"It won't be good until you show Mar god dammit."

"And welcome to Day 3 of the Hunger Games. With 17 tributes remaining there is a lot of work to be done."

"Work? I think you mean murder Caesar, but that's never bothered you has it?"

"But who knows what surprises the Gamemakers have in store for our tributes. Let's recap last night's events."

"I already know what happened last night, show Mar GOD DAMMIT!"

"Alright Finnick, that is enough!" Turning of the hologram. Finnick turned on me. Snarling.

"Give me the remote Aralia." His eyes were dark, shoulders squared but leaning forward. Like he would attack at any second.

"Finnick! Dear this isn't helping her!" Jackson tried to approach him. A gentle hand on his shoulder like he always did. Finnick snapped his arm and threw him back. Jackson had a look of horror on his face. He held his arm close and there was a gash on his forehead. Finnick wasn't just the Golden Boy of the Capitol, he'd won for a reason. _God he could kill us._ He stalked towards me and I was terrified. Mags stepped forward. She grabbed Finnick's face and slapped him. He turned on sweet old Mags. She didn't back down. Finally the darkness in his eyes snapped away. The green was back. He looked around,

" _Shit_ , Jackson..." Finnick went to help him up, but Jackson scrambled away while whimpering. Finnick let out a sob as well. "I-ih just wh-ant her h-home!" Mags came over to the broken tribute. "I've f-hailed her so ma-hany times bef-hore. I can't f-hail her anymore." He started to shake. "I'm sorry. I'm sorry." He started rocking back and forth. It was pathetic. I'd never seen him look so, human.

"This isn't helping her Finnick. She needs you. She needs you coherent, focused and ready. She needs you to be Finnick Odair Capitol Darling. That's what will save her Finnick. Not this." My voice was stern. We were supposed to be a team. He's breaking. "You can't break right now Finnick. She. Needs. You."

"I-hi aham ne-hever en-hough."

"Finnick. Do you love her?"

"I have have to protect her."

"Do you love her?"

"I can't let her down again!"

"YOU ARE LETTING HER DOWN RIGHT NOW ODAIR!" I could see the click in his mind. "Fucking finally! Now let's go help our girl!"

Finnick's POV

" _My girl"_ I breathed. Blocking out everything else. Every doubt every fear. Aralia is right. If I'm breaking down I can't help Mar. I nod, grabbing coffee and a shower. When I come out the Games is back on. The cameras following the Careers. "Did they find her?"

"No they aren't even close. She managed to kill a deer with her branch though. It was pretty intense."

"They can't eat deer raw."

"They found someone else's parachute." Aralia sent me a wicked smile. "Looks like it was going to One." I smirked at that.

"Was there anything else in the parachute?"

"Two hunting knives." Collapsing next to Mags I sighed in relief. "They are closing in on the girl from Twelve."

"Poor thing looks like hell." Jackson walked back into the room. I wanted to jump up and apologize. "Marjorie is _clearly_ your world Finnick. What's a few head wounds between friends hmm?" I opened and closed my mouth like a fish.

"How can I make it up to you?"

"Getting your head out of your ass is a great start." Aralia commented dryly. Jackson sat on the otherside of the room. I feel like an ass hole. _Because you are._

"Fobus Phimmick. Mar meeds oo."

As the day wore on the Careers find the girl from Twelve as well as the two tributes from Five. Mar and Al have been moving around. They got lost once the snow storm picked up. Both still carrying some meat. Although it wasn't cooked they were promised a meal soon. Nothing 'exciting' happens for quite some time. A cannon booms.

"Oh it looks like another tribute has fallen. Who could it be?" I heard Mar scream after the cannon went off and almost lost my mind. _Al? Mar? Shit._ The cameras quickly panned to Al and Mar, both of them were alive, but 100 yards off the Careers were resting. Al and Daniel made eye contact through a clear in the storm. Daniel let out a hoot and started sprinting after Mar and Al.

Mar's POV

Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. Shit. They're gaining. Damn my short legs. Knees, lift the knees.

"Mhar!"

"I know."

"I told you you're mine you little bitch."

"Fuck you!"

"Mayhbe antaghonizhing them isn't the bhest phlan?!"

"They have to catch us first. Move your fat ass!"

"I ham not f-hat!"

"Less talking. More running!"

"You won't get away!"

"You have spears! Throw them!" Shit. Shit. Shit. Looking back. The spear was coming towards me. Jumping to the left I was able to keep moving. A scratch on my arm the only damage. I think it was a scratch. The spear landed in front of me so I grabbed it.

"Thanks!" I called over my shoulder. Al looks at me quickly with a nod and a smile.

"Son of a bitch?!"

"I thought the spear was your best weapon!"

"She moved!"

"What did you expect her to sit still?!"

"SHUT UP MACE!"

"Dammit they're getting away!"

Looking around we weren't really getting away. Al was getting tired. There was a storm moving across the area. White out conditions. We could lose them there. "Al. This way!"

"There is a storm that way!"

"I'm aware!"

"Are you crazy?"

"Have you met me?!"

"We won't be able to see shit."

"Neither will they!" I reached over and started dragging him. "Don't let go of my hand." We kept fighting. The wind was whipping violently. Their voices were lost in the howls of the blizzard. I don't think they were close. The snow was getting really bad. We needed shelter. There was another large evergreen tree. Covered in snow. The branches hanging down low to the ground. I dragged Al towards it. Inside there was still some wind. But it wasn't as bad. Doubling over I started gasping for breath. "That snow is intense."

"Yhouu dhon't shay!" Breathe. Breathe.

"Al, are you okay?" he waved his hand brushing me off. We sat in silence. Our breathing took a solid 20 minutes to cool out. I assume the Careers are lost in the snow too. But with this wind, We wouldn't hear them until it was too late.

"Get the knives out Mar." Al said after a while.

"I think we're okay Al, sit down rest." He shot me a glare.

"We have two hunting knives and a spear. If the Careers find us we are as good as dead."

"They probably won't Al."

"I'm not willing to take that chance." His voice was hard and final. He was still breathing deeply. But not wheezing anymore which is really really good. Every time he wheezes I freak out. He starts sawing off a few smaller branches.

"I don't think a fire is a good idea right now Al."

"They're for spears, not fire wood."

"No those look like branches to me." I sassed back. He was being so serious again. I didn't want that. I didn't want this. We were safe for now.

"We have knives so we can _actually sharpen_ the branches into spears. Come on, get to work."

"Al, we're fine."

"We are going to have to kill at some point Mar." I took in a deep breath and looked at him with fear. "You need to get over this."

"Get over it?! Al, how am I supposed to go home and look the kids in the eye again huh? After I've killed people?"

"Do it in self defense" He sat down started sharpening the spears.

"That's a bullshit excuse" The branch in his hand was instantly in the snow as he jumped up. Standing right in my face.

"So what you're going to roll over and let them kill you? Leave the kids! They fucking need you Mar, after you get home they will be set for life."

"It's just…. Ugggh" I pulled away I can't look at him. I don't want to do this. I don't.

"Self-defense is self-defense Mar. It's not an excuse."

"You haven't lived with the guilt Al." Closing my eyes I can feel the rain pouring down. The shutter of his neck as I snapped it. Grabbing my chest. It hurt. Literal pain. From a memory. _When you killed someone_.

Finnick's POV

She's in pain. She's in pain and I'm not there. She looks so pale. At least what I can see. And she was hit by that spear. "Remember your reasons Mar. You always have a reason." Luckily the Careers are nowhere near them. Al's breathing is still ragged.

"They do too, what makes my reason better than theirs?" She was waving her arms around in frustration. She did that when we were little too…

"Nothing." Al's cold voice snapped me back from my memories. Her eyes met him and held nothing but desperation. "You could go out there and die. They are fighting to live too. You have to want it more. You sure sound like you're giving up. That's not the girl I know." She sighed and flopped to the snowy ground next to Al.

"I just, don't want to take life Al. I know how. I've done it before. It's just..." her arms flop at her sides as she tries to get a grip. She hates breaking I know she hates breaking. But I think Al is breaking too.

"Not something caring people want to do. You've got the biggest heart out of everyone I've ever met." Sitting down he scoots closer to her. Pulling her face mask down. "Tell me this Mar. How are the kids going to get on without you?" The camera cuts in between their faces. She wants to speak. "They won't. You _know_ they won't." But he's right. And she knows it. "You can help _so many_ people with this Mar. Make a difference." She looks so scared. God I just want to wrap her up and never let her go. Al starts to laugh. "That's your problem. You give away all your love, and keep none for yourself. Sometimes to give, you have to take." She shoots up at that. Absolute anger on her face. Outrage even.

"They aren't stepping stones. They aren't objects, they are people! We are all people! It's so fucked. _So fucked._ " She throws herself to the snow again.

"Wah-hatch your mouth Ms. Scur, this is a f-hamily show." Al sends her a weak smirk.

"Ha ha. And all of Panem just heard me break down, fantastic."

"You're right. _A-hall_ of Panem heard you. That means their fa-hamilies heard you too Mar. Everyone with a brain will know you don't w-hant to do this. You do have a choice Mar. Choose saving yourself from the guilt or sa-having the ones you love. That's not a qu-hestion and you know it. Not for you. There isn't a shelfish bone in your bhody." He's starting to wheeze more.

"It's not fair."

"Nhothing real ever is Mar." Al's breathing starts to pick up. "God I'm soh tired… Can you t-hake first watch?"

"Yeah I got it. We did a lot of running Al. You rest." Mar was keeping watch for the Careers. They weren't going to find them. They had hardly moved 100 yards from their camp. Al's chest was starting to rise and fall faster. How had she not noticed his wheezing yet? His eyes were closed. She was a few feet from him. Trusting that he was okay. But he wasn't.

"M-Mar, promise me. Prhom-his m-he." She was at his side in seconds. Hand resting on his cheek as she checked his pupils.

"Al?" Panic was seeping into her eyes. I could see the wheels turning in her head.

"P-r-hom-his m-he you w-hont g-hive hup." She's shaking her head. His eyes flutter closed. He barely has the strength to keep them open. But he's trying so hard.

"Al?"

"S-hay hit."

"Al! What's… I can help. Tell me what's happening." She's frantically checking his pulse and making sure his airway is clear. Listening to his chest. Al grabs her shoulders and shakes her.

"Ss-hay hit Mhar." Desperation on her face. Determination on his.

"I.. I promise."

"Ghood." His arms drop as Al starts taking more shuttering breaths. "Rhud-hie b-haby… I l-hove you s-ho da-ham m-huch. I'm sr-hory babe." His voice started cracking up.

"Al, just just keep fighting okay. Take deep breaths. Just stop talking and rest. You're going to be fine. Okay? You need to be fine. I need you to be fine." Her voice was breaking. Each word rose a few steps higher

"t-hak c-hare of hour ba-haby Rhud-hie. Yh-hull be a gr-hate m-hom."

"Al, dammit, I said shut up! Just focus on breathing. Just breathe, please." She was trying to stop this. Trying to bring him back. But it was time. It was his time.

"I ham, soh pr-houd of y-who Marh. I kn-hoe Ka-hari his t-hoo" She looked in his eyes, and she knew. What all of Panem knew.

"Don't leave me. Please. Please don't leave me." And for the first time since I found her again she looked scared. She let everything drop as she begged Al to stay.

"I'll b-he. R-hight here." He pointed at her heart. She grabbed his hand. And held it to her face.

"No. No please. Al." his eyes fluttered closed again "Al… Alnus. Al?" Mar grabbed his body. "Dammit Al. ALNUS! AL! YOU CAN'T GOD DAMMIT! IT'S NOT FAIR!" she started doing chest compressions. Giving him CPR. For ten minutes this went on. "FUCK!" she threw his body away from her. Gripping her hair and rocking back and forth as she looked at the body of her dead brother. I know tears are pouring down my face. There isn't a dry eye in the room. All of Panem even. Mar crawls over to him after another 10 minutes. There's a little blood on her mouth from when she gave him CPR. I've never seen a more broken person. She pulls off his face mask completely. Running her hands through his hair softly. She keeps switching from sorrow to anger. She'll scream at his dead body or the world. Then sob begging him to come back. It's hard to watch. But I can't look away. She needs me. And I'm not there. The hovercraft comes down to collect his body. Mar glances in that direction. "Not yet. He might wake up. There wasn't a cannon he might wake up. He might wake up." The cannon had boomed 30 minutes before. The wind was blowing and Mar was screaming so loud. She couldn't of heard it. This show was sick. This whole thing was sick. It made me sick. I felt like I was going to throw up. I just might. She's still muttering words. The hovercraft is waiting.

"Please clear away from the fallen tribute." Claudius's voice calls out. Mar looks up at the sky. Al has been dead for 45 minutes at this point. No one in the history of the games has ever had to be told that. No one in the history of the games has ever broken this much. Everyone watched her heartbreak; her pain breaking their own.

"N-no." she's shaking. She grabs his body and tries to pull him away from the hovercraft. "You can't take him. He can't be gone! He can't be dammit!" The screen switches over to the Careers.

"Look! The hovercraft!"

"Someone is dead so what?"

"That could be them Mace. Only one cannon went off." A wicked smirk played on Daniels face. "Let's go kill that bitch."

"It's not that far. They have to be close." Devi agrees.

"Let's do it."

"She's my kill."

"Yeah yeah whatever." Mace frowns pulling his facemask up as they all head out. Thank god the snow is blowing. They are moving at a glacial pace. ' _Dammit Mar you're going to get yourself killed.'_ I start sprinting to the sponsor center. I need to send her something. Anything. She's still in danger. The screen behind me was zoomed in on Mar. Trying to stay with Al. While the Careers are on their way. The hovercraft is a great big sign saying ' _come and kill me!_ ' how the hell doesn't she see that?! Her brother just died. I won't let her die too. It's a frantic race between what will get her out of there and watching to make sure she's still alive. There's a horrible cracking sound. The hovercraft has dropped the crane onto the tree they were hiding under. Gasps ran throughout the whole area. I don't think a single person moved as they watched the crane barrel down on Mar and Al's body. Broken the branches of the tree fell on top of her. One branch hit her head. Enough to draw blood. I could kill them. I'd kill them all god dammit. The claw grabbed Al as well as the largest branch that had fallen. _She's grieving you heartless bastards._ As the crane rose, she shoved the ones that were still on her away. They had to weigh 100 pounds each. I don't think that mattered right now though. She jumped up, taking only 3 steps. Her eyes. Her gray-green eyes. That's what the camera focused on. Her pain. It was suffocating me. They next showed a shot of what Mar was seeing. As the hovercraft disappeared into the storm. She'd stopped crying. Her face was hard set. She pulled up her face mask, the top already being stained with blood. Standing she looked in the direction Al's body had been taken. "I'm going home." Her voice was hard. As hard as an edge of her blade. She grabbed two knives and used them to scale the tree. Settling on a well-covered branch. It protected her from the wind. Her legs dangled on each side of the branch. Her eyes were gone. So far away from where she was. The Careers were lost again in the storm. One camera stayed with Mar while the others went to follow their conflict.

"Dammit, why did we listen to you!? I can't see more than 3 feet! How the hell are we supposed to find them huh?!"

"Shut up Mace! I'm the leader, I make the decisions!"

"You're making really shitty ones!"

"It's s-so cold you guys. Let's go back."

"Ye-ye-eah. It c-cou-ld have been her th-tha-t died."

"It wasn't her Dalia, not a chance in hell." Daniel screamed. "But if you _chicken shits_ want to run back to camp be my guest. I thought I was teamed up with Careers. Not a bunch of weaklings." The shock on everyone's face was clear as day. Mace turned around grabbing Dalia and dragging her through the snow.

"Dan, come on." Devi, his district partner coaxed. "We need to stick to the plan."

"I. Want. Her. Dead."

"Then we need their help. Dalia is a tracker Dan. We both suck at that. If she walks then there is no chance that we find that cocky bitch." Devi threw her hands up in the air clearly frustrated with the asshole she called her partner. He trudged after her. When back at camp he made a bullshit apology. No one bought it but everyone let it slide for the time being.

"So much drama, so much heart break. These are proving to be an exciting games indeed!" Caesar kept talking but I zoned out. I need to figure out something to give Mar. She needs to keep fighting. Ointment for her wound. Bandages.

"She'll want to keep her scars Finnick." I turned seeing Aralia and Jackson, both crying as well. "She made a big fuss when the prep team tried to remove them. She's damaged on the inside. She wants everyone to see it. See what she's overcome."

"And if she gives up? She's, she's breaking in there. And there's nothing I can do."

"Mister Odair?" A few Capitolites were gathering around. I don't have the energy to be the Golden boy right now. _Can't you just leave me alone?!_ "For your tribute." They each handed over a wad of cash or coins. I nodded to the woman who spoke to me. It wasn't often I was moved by the kindness of the Capitol. They were usually too selfish to realize anything bad was happening. My voice was failing me. Jackson was in tears. Blubbering mess actually. What's the one thing that always made Mar and me feel better? A sad smile played on my face. I walked up to the counter.

"I need a can of ointment, a role of bandages, a loaf of district four bread and a thermos of hot chocolate with extra marshmallows sent to Marjoire Scur." The desk clerk nodded, everyone saw what had just happened. "Can I have some paper too?" My voice was breaking a bit. I stared at the paper for a few minutes while the clerk got the stuff together. I started to scribble down a message. I hoped it worked. I hope it helps. I need her in my arms so I can hug and kiss the pain away. The winds started to die down a bit. Mar was still sitting there, lifeless.

"It's on its way." The clerk said. I gave him a nod. Walking closer to the monitor.

Mar's POV

I'd been wanting to stop feeling all week. It finally happened. Took the death of my older brother, but hey. I got what I wanted… The temperature was nothing compared to the emptiness and anger I felt. They'd taken his body from me. Knocked me down so they could steel him away. The winds started to calm, fat snowflakes fell. It was almost beautiful. There's a darkness to every beauty. A shadow to every light. Some times to give, first you have to take…. I heard a beeping, and almost laughed. We hadn't gotten anything from the sponsors yet. ' _Al's dead and you send me shit now?_ ' the parachute landed at the base of the tree. I opened it up and there was an actual letter. Brow furrowed I opened it up.

' _I know you're probably pissed that this is coming in now. There was no way to guarantee you'd actually get what I sent you until now. A lot of other districts have wasted a lot of money on parachutes that never made it to their tribute. Keep an eye out for those by the way.'_ I scoffed. The wind had been completely fucked. And if it was somewhat decent Al and I were moving. It explained why we were able to find our knives _'I got you some of your favorites, or at least they used to be. I hope you like them still. Remember, near or far wherever you are, we will always be loving you. Come home to us. – F'_

I folded it up and put the letter in one of my many pockets. Trying to bite back the tears. Kneeling down I opened up the container more. There was bread from four. In a container that might just keep it warm. A bag, a belt full of knives, ointment and bandages. Then a thermos filled with something. I opened it up and choked back a sob. " _You stupid sensitive wonderful jerk_." Taking a shuttering breathe I nodded and smiled.

Finnick's POV

"You haven't lost your touch Odair." She smiled up to the sky, teary eyed. A smile made its way to my face. _"You stupid jerk, you're making me cry more."_ Laughing out right, Smiling widely at the screen. She kept muttering a few things here and there. The wind blew her words away.

"Well, quite the touching message from her mentor Finnick Odair." Claudius sounded over Mar's footage.

"I wonder if there's something going on there Claudius." Caesar added. "They would make a lovely couple. The most beautiful in all of Panem!"

"Without a doubt."

"So what do you think folks? Here's our latest pole. Do you think our own Finnick Odair could heal Ms. Scur's broken heart?" _Shit…._

"She certainly deserves it after such a traumatic experience." Caesar and Claudius continued to banter back and forth.

"It was so sweet she didn't want to let her brother go."

"Such a brave woman, I think she deserves a happy ending don't you?" _More than you will ever know._

"Oh yes of course, but she needs to fight for it." _Snow is going to kill her._

"And we'll be here watching her. There are great things coming from this woman. I can tell." _I was just trying to keep her alive. Did I just get her killed?_

"Did I just get her killed Leah?" I breathed. She turned to her right,

"We are about to find out."

"Mr. Odair, come with me please." Two Peacekeepers arrived I didn't try to hide my grimace. Walking into Snow's office was the same as it always was. If you don't suffocate on the stench of roses and blood, then you run the risk of not walking out of the room again. Still Mar was the only thing on my mind. Snow had live footage of the games playing from a hologram on his desk.

"Mr. Odair. So good to see you again."

"And you Sir. How can I help you?" My voice was smooth as silk….. I hope.

"This girl, Marjorie Scur. What is she to you?" Snow's beady eyes honed in on me.

"I think you've figured that out Sir." My muscles tensed. He nodded

"Yes I have." He muted Caesar and Claudius as they continued on about a possible relationship. "Are you in a relationship with her?"

"No Sir." Was my immediate response.

"And why is that Mr. Odair? She is a beautiful woman." He was weighing me, again. He knows why dammit.

"Because our arrangement forbids me to enter into any kind of a permanent relationship. Besides, she doesn't have time for love. She's said so many times Sir."

"I think you and I both know that's a load of crap Mr. Odair." He rested his hands on his desk. Eyeing me strategically. "If you could be with her, would you?"

"In a heartbeat."

"It's an awfully strong bond to have grown over such a short time."

"It… didn't" he already knew this. He wanted to see if I would lie. "We were childhood friends."

"Were?" His voice was coy. _God you stupid bastard you already know this._

"Her parents died in a fire." A flash of satisfaction flickered in his eyes. _Did he had something to do with it._ "I thought she died as well. At my reaping she came to say good bye. I wanted to get back to her."

"Then after you came back?"

"…..I didn't want to put her in danger." My voice was soft.

"So it is love then? Wonderful." _He is way too happy about this. I narrowed my eyes at him, where's the catch?_ "Do you not think that's wonderful?" he was taunting me.

"Love is a wonderful thing, when you are allowed to pursue it. As you know sir. I am not allowed to do so."

"You are quite _valuable_." He smiled. _God this man is sick._ "The people are quite taken with her as well. She's captivated all of the capitol."

"How are you going to use her sir?" I couldn't bite back the question anymore.

"If she wins?" He raises an eyebrow, "Well, I'm sure there will be quite a few ways." _I am going to need new teeth after this. If I clench my jaw any harder they are all going to crack._ "But, I think we will deal with that when we get there. She hasn't won _yet_ Mr. Odair." My stomach dropped. He looked even more devilish than usual. _God this is Mar…._ "She won't be yours Mr. Odair. It's bad for business, you know. No one will want to get in between you two lovers. But I will allow you to be together. Privately. If she wants you that is."

"Why?"

"Most people would say ' _Thank you President Snow'_ "

"Most people don't have our relationship sir. I need to know if you are going to use this to hurt her." Snow sent me a wicked smile.

"It will control you both. She is a fighter Mr. Odair. And you will clearly fight like hell for her. If I give you what you want. You will do anything to keep it." He shuffled some papers. "No more love notes. Is that clear?"

"Yes sir."

"On your way." He waved me off and the Peacekeepers grabbed me throwing me from the room. I made my way back to the Sponsor Center. Aralia and Jackson hadn't moved.

"What happened while I was gone?"

"She's been muttering about you being a cute jerk a lot." Aralia teased.

"She's so strong Finnick, so strong!"

"Oh, we were also given a lot more money." Aralia handed me a bag filled with cash.

"You've got to be kidding me…"

"Nope, she's almost as popular as you were." _That's not a good thing._ "It'll keep her alive Finnick. Bring her home. That's something 23 others aren't getting."

"I just want her back in my arms…" I breathed.

"We all do."

"Finnick! Finnick my dear there you are!" I turned from the TV unsure who it was.

"Euripides?"

"Oh I've been looking all over for you three! Where have you been hiding?!"

"Right here." Aralia deadpanned. She and Euripides had never gotten along. He huffed but ignored Leah's comment.

"Well, I've got some great news!" his blue skin was brimming with excitement. "If we get Mar out of the games I've already been approached by three companies who want to work with her! Isn't that exciting?!" If we weren't in public I would have hit him. It took all of my self-restraint to stop.

"She isn't even out of the damn games and you're already whoring her out?!" Aralia whisper yelled. Euripides looked at all of our faces. Frown settled on his face.

"No actually. They want her to be a model. And a designer. And a spokesperson." He huffed. "I wouldn't wish that on anyone. Honestly." The blue man turned and flounce back from whence he came.

"How I ever get through the games without strangling that man, I'll never know." Aralia muttered turning to the screen again. Mar had managed to fall asleep, she was holding the thermos of cocoa to her chest. _You can do it Mar. Please come home to me._


	4. Path Of Destruction

I don't know how long I've been in this tree. Or how I managed to stop crying. It's so cold. The cocoa is long gone. It stopped helping after a while though. Al is dead. The idea is so foreign but every time I turn to ask him a question. Or check on him, He's not there. And the tears begin again. The cycle continues for who knows how long. Finally I am jolted to realty when I hear shouting. There is almost no wind. _Time for another death…_ A small streak of black bolts across the snowy plane. It's the kid from Twelve. The little one. His partner has already died. Within seconds the two tributes from 8 and the boy from 9 are sprinting after the boy. He changes direction. Heading over the icy lake. 'Smart kid' even the thin ice should hold his weight. But the larger tributes are sure to fall through. There is a sickening crack and within moments the male from 8 is in the water. His tribute partner tries to get him out. But he's panicking. 'That's the worst thing you could do.' He pulls the girl in with him. Using her as a floatation device. The girl from 11 hits him hard on the head with a chunk of ice. He lets go of his partner sinking below the ice. The girl from 8 is lighter and able to find some ice that will hold her weight. It looks like it anyway.

"Raaaagh!" ' _The boy_.' He was standing hundreds of yards away but the male from 9 managed to run the poor boy through. It was horrible to see. As the tribute hunched over in shock the spear caught on the ground. Arrowhead sinking into the snow. Forcing the dying tribute to screech again as the spear was moved by his meager body weight. The icy wind carried the ragged breathing and crying like a sick and twisted melody. Echoing off of the trees. I know the sound will haunt me forever. The three surviving tributes left the boy there to die. Alone…. Who leaves a kid to die like that? _The same kind who sits in a tree watching the kid die._ Am I really doing this? _If he were yours, would you want him to die alone?_ This could get me killed. _Yeah maybe, but it's the right thing to do._

Against my better judgment I jumped down. Moving fast but sticking to the tree line. All the snow was solid so it was a quick trip. Walking up to his quivering figure made me sick. The boy's eyes were wide and the snow was painted red. Melting all around him from the heat of his blood. He had managed to flop onto his side. Not even crying for help. Just whimpering in pain. It's the most heart breaking sound in the world. I look at his brown hair and scared eyes and Kander has suddenly taken this boy's place. A stifled sob comes from the boy's mouth. "Hey,"

"I don't want to die!" as if the desperate plea will some how save him. The pain must be the only thing keeping him awake. There's so much blood. Clouds form as the warm liquid meets the frigged air. Small whiffs of steam attest to the dramatic difference in temperature. _He will be cold soon. Still and frozen in death._ I kneel next to him and start to try and brush away a few tears

"You shouldn't have to. None of us should. But we're here. And it is. And even if I had medical equipment. I couldn't save you right now. You are dying."

"No! No! I can't be! I want to go home! My mom is going to be all alone now!" His broken voice echoed off of the trees. It was like we were the only two in the games. The world had stopped to watch this.

"I'm sorry." His voice and breathing we becoming ragged. What do you say to a stranger who's dying? What do you say to a twelve year old kid who's dying a slow painful death? We sit in silence, the only thing I can do is provide comfort. _What good will it even do?_

"It-t hurts… so much.." I strangled sob leaves my throat as I look at the young boy.

"I can make it stop. I… I can make it quick… and you'll go to the place of your dreams. And everyone you've ever lost will be there. And they'll hold you and love you. You'll be far away from this world. You'll be free." His eyes were filled with fear. "I won't do it if you don't want me to. Either way, I'm going to sstay right here okay. I know I'm not your family. But you are not alone. Okay? You're not alone."

"W-w-why?"

"Because, no one deserves this. No one deserves to die alone. I can't save you from death, but I can make sure you leave this world knowing you've made a difference. Because I will never forget you okay."

"I d-on't w-w-want to dis-ap-p-pear."

"You w-won't." shaky lungs tried to fill my trembling body. "You'll become like the wind." No one knows what death is. So I'm not technically lying. "Or a cloud. Free and clear. And always there. And I promise you will never disappear. You'll stay in all of the hearts of the lives you've touched."

"H-h-how d-do you know?"

"Because I've lo-lost a lot of people. A lot. And I think of them ev-er-ery day. And I promise you I'll think of you every day too. I always keep my promises." Taking a shuttering breath "I think you'll like where your going. I bet it's warm."

"Do you think there's a beach?"

"Do you want there to be?"

"y-ye-ah."

"Then there will be." I smiled softly at the boy. "I'll show up there someday too. And when I do I'll teach you how to fish like a real fisherman."

"Wi-wi-will you teach me how to swim li-li-like a marmaid."

"It's c-ca-lled mermaid. And I wi-will if y-you want."

"I'd like that."

"The sand will be warm, and get all over. And the salt will hang in the air hugging everything it touches. Like an old friend. And then you'll know that you're safe." His chest stopped moving. He'll take another breathe in a second. Just keep talking. "You'll be wrapped up in more love then could ever exist here. And you'll be free. From pain. From hunger. From l-l-loss. A-and you-you-you'll get to play with all the o-others who h-ave go-gone be-be-bef-fo-ore you. You'll ne-ne-ne-nev-er b-b-b-be a-a-al-alo-o-one." I bent over the poor boy's body. "I'm so sorry that you had to die. I'm so sorry that it had to be here. No one should have to die here. I-I ho-hope y-yo-you di-di-din't fe-ee-eel a-a-alo-one… It-tt-'s the wor-wors-st f-ee-eling in the wo-wor-rld." All of Panem was watching me break. All of Panem watched this innocent little boy die. He, didn't deserve this…. I felt so much colder then the wind-chill. Can I even feel? My body moved on its own accord as I took off my glove. Grabbing a throwing knife from my sheath, I pressed the blade to my skin. The padding of my left index finger was severed. Was I even bleeding? My hands opened one of his. It was clenched in death. Eyes void of all life. It lost in the snow surrounding us. Finally a small enough gap was created. Shoving My severed hunk of flesh in the opening. I used what strength I could to force it shut. Staring at the corpse, I hoped his spirit knew. A part of me just died too. "I know you'd say I can't save everyone Al. But here? I can't save anyone. Not you, Not even myself… why would my life ever be worth more then this boy's. Then anyone's? Who has the right to decide that?! Who has the right to choose to send death upon innocent people! This is not penance! This is not retribution! This is cruelty! And nothing more! A boy just died… how… how is this entertainment? Just…. Why…" sobs wracked my body again as I doubled over. Laying in the blood coated snow. I couldn't move. I promised him I'd stay, until it was over. So I did. The hovercraft appeared over head. I stepped away, not before placing a kiss on his forehead. I made sure he had a piece of me. So he'd know that where ever it is he's going. He's taking a piece of me with him. The hovercraft took him away. Like it had all the others. How could anyone every be proud of this? My veins were running cold.

' _If you are ever in sub zero temperatures and you can't find shelter you need to keep moving._ ' Alta's voice rang in my head. I walked over to the edge of the pond. The drowned boy from 8 hadn't been fished out yet. I carefully made my way to the edge of the ice. Cutting off another piece of skin, padding from the heal of my hand this time . Kneeling in the snow, I fingered the small chunk of flesh. Eyes focused as the temperature killed the tissue "I didn't know you. I didn't like what parts of you I was shown. But there's so much more to every person then just one face. I don't think we would have gotten along at all. But… I'm still sorry you died." With that I threw the chunk of skin into the hole in the ice. Carefully making my way back to the snow shelf. I needed to keep moving. I heard a parachute falling from the sky. I frowned at the gift. "Don't waste people's money Finnick. I don't want their shit." I took a shaky breathe and moved on. Leaving blood drops in the snow as I moved along.

Finnick's POV

The boy died 30 minutes into today's broadcast. Caesar is going on about how selfless and brave Mar is being. Sympathy for her is through the roof. Haymitch even managed to stagger over. He clapped me on the shoulder.

"Brrrring tha annnnglll hoooome" Then, in his usual fashion, took a nose dive into one of the couches, bouncing on the floor before passing out. No one paid the drunk any mind. She was the favorite to win, with out a doubt. But what she was saying… it was going to cause her a lot of trouble. She needs to be careful. She's in the games, but thinking the others are safe at home is crazy. _She doesn't have a clue the danger she is putting them in._ Aralia was glancing at me. From the corner of my vison I could see her worried stare.

"He won't do anything until after the final 8 right?" she breathed in fear. The clenching of my chest caused a physical wince. That seemed to be answer enough… Aralia started to mutter to herself. Not bothered with the words she spoke I focused on Mar. She'd stayed with two tributes until death. _What is she thinking cutting off pieces of her skin like that?! She's weakening herself. Her mental state is bad enough._ Mag's hand gently rested on my arm, causing me to almost topple over. Mags and I shared a look. Aralia and Jackson were muttering to each other. Everyone afraid to speak.

"We'll find out after two more deaths." I ground out. There were gasps among the crowd as she walked. Her bleeding was slowing. They'd showed her refusing a capitol gift. They'd showed her screaming against the games. In agony over the death of a boy who she didn't know. Who she's never spoken to before his death. She apologized to the boy from Seven too. _Is she leaving pieces of herself with them?_ That is too symbolic, If she doesn't stop then there are going to be problems. She's said it there's 24 people waiting for her at home. That's a lot of people, and who other then her would miss a few orphans? If the deaths don't pick up soon, then the Gamemakers will change the games. She's on the top of _their_ kill list now. And that's even more dangerous. Snow will probably want to see me soon. I haven't been propositioned in a while. The show is too good for even my clients to miss. Mar keeps walking in a daze until the temperature drops. The sky is perfectly clear, and any exposed piece of skin is getting frozen on contact. The girl from District Seven dies from hypothermia. Unable to get her clothes dry. Only nine left to go…. No one dares to move in the bitter cold. Not even the Careers are brave enough to leave their fire. The artic chill lasts well into the morning. Both tributes from District Eleven die as well. The cold finally stalling their hearts.

"Down to the final 6. The messages from home will air tonight." Jackson's somber voice broke our relative quiet. I hummed in response. "Do you think something has happened?"

"We'll find out." With it being the final 6, prices at the Sponsor Center had skyrocketed. She was managing okay. She'd managed to keep that deer meat, it was frozen so it kept well. Using the flint she'd found in the parachute for One she'd built a few fires. It looks too cold not to. She isn't sleeping. I can't say I blame her. At this point in my games I wasn't sleeping either. She's also mourning two barbaric deaths. I had no allies in my games. I didn't want to be haunted by their deaths. Joke was on me, I see their faces everywhere. I hear their screams, I don't think it will ever stop.

Looking back to the screen I see Mar's haunted figure. Her eyes are hollow. Those are the only things you can see. Frost has built up on her lashes. It might be my imagination, but her eyes look grayer then they had been. Almost dead…

Mar's POV

I'm disappearing again Al. I wish you were here to stop me. But I'm glad you don't have to see this. I don't know if I'll make it back this time. Or if there will be anything left of the girl you knew. You always say I do everything for everyone else. That I should do one thing for myself for once. And I know what I want for myself. I want to die… But I'm on camera constantly. They see every blink and breath. Hear every rant and sob. I know the kids will be watching. Even though I asked them not to. They need me. It's a desperate reason to live. With each passing minute I long for the selfishness of it all. The nothingness. The freedom. I shouldn't be thinking like this, but you were always the positive one in our relationship. I need this to stop. I need to go home. I need to get out. Before every ounce of me is truly gone.

"I'm disappearing again…" the words danced on the puff of steam that left my mouth as I spoke. The others came to mind. I'm going to do horrible things in order to get home… "Ruddy, Dare…. Please don't hate me for what I'm about to do. Better yet, if your watching. Stop…" A chill of dread snaked through my system. My hand wounds had been wrapped. My wounds had frozen over. The sub-zero temperatures working in my favor for once. Standing from the snow I flexed. What is the fastest way to kill people with out having to physically kill them. Glancing around my eyes landed on the snow covered mountain. Flashing back to what I learned in training.

" _what dangers are there in different climates?" I had asked our survival teacher._

" _There is always a danger of dehydration, starvation, infection."_

" _I get that but are there any climate related things to worry about? Like in Four we get Hurricanes sometimes." The trainer had smiled._

" _There are quite a few of those instances." I sat looking expectantly at the man. He gave me a sly smirk. "You're smarter then the others."_

" _Compliments, while nice, aren't going to keep me alive in the ring. The information I've asked you for? That definitely can."_

" _If you're stuck in the mountains be careful not to make too much noise. You could cause a rock slide or an avalanche._

" _What's that?"_

" _A title wave of ice cold hard snow barreling down a hill or mountain. Usually from high up. The higher the more dangerous."_

" _That's terrifying."_

" _It's unlikely to happen though. Unless the Gamemakers controlled it, it would kill too many tributes."_

There is a snow covered mountain in the arena. It's a hell of a long way away. _That'll work. As long as I survive long enough to get there._ There is also the question of how I get the avalanche started and surviving. Without my weapons there wasn't much else I could really do. I didn't want to spill more blood. I didn't want to have anymore lifeless eyes haunting me. _The chances of surviving that is dangerously low. Maybe if I can't think of anything else…._

A growl from my stomach brought a more pressing concern. I'd nibbled away at my deer meat but it took too long to cook. And even though it was cooked I had to thaw the meet to be able to chew it. Too much work for right now. Off to hunt then.

After a few hours of trudging through the snow I had nothing. The only thing good about my "walk" was it kept my blood circulating. You could see the mountain from every part of the arena. _It might not even be something we can access. There could be a force field._ That's not a risk worth taking. I need food. I doubt Finnick will send be anything now. If he has money I doubt he'll use it. But starving is nothing new… The little strength I'd had was waning. Leaning against a tall evergreen I gasped trying to get air in my lungs. It hadn't been strenuous walking but it was like I had been running for my life. My legs weren't overly weak. I still let them collapse beneath me. Head lulling back into the bark. _I have to get home. I have to get back to the kids. I have to find the strength._

Finnick's POV

My stomach dropped along with Mar's body. I could feel her pain. My sence of helplessness crippling me further. I don't know who's suffering worse. Me or Mar. I started towards the Sponsor Center. She said she didn't want anything. But she's going to die with out it. The Gamemakers have killed off all of the animals in the arena. I don't know what they have planned next but the chances of her getting food on her own are 1000 to 1.

"What kind of food is left?"

"Crackers." Is all the clerk responded with. "There's dried beef too but that's $3000. It's the"

"End of the Games I know."

"Your girl seems to be doing alright." I glared at the clerk.

"She hasn't eaten anything in 18 hours. She's been walking through heavy snow for the last 3. She needs food. How much are the damn crackers?"

"$2100" Desperation is not a good emotion for me to have. _Keep control Fin. She needs you._ "It's the en"

"End of the games, I know." Air filled my lungs as I tried willing my muscles to relax and my nerves to calm. "Thanks anyway" I don't know or care if the guy heard me. I walked back to where the others were. Mar was where I left her. She let her head hit the tree again. She was muttering to herself. She jumped so suddenly that I jumped as well. A smile on her chapped lips. Digging out her knife she sliced into the tree behind her. My shoulders sagged in relief. Bark, how had I forgotten that? How did she manage to think of it? It doesn't matter either way. She'll get enough in her system for her body to think that she's getting food. Her system won't completely shut down. She was hacking away at the bark. Eyebrows furrowed in concentration. The tip of her baby pink tongue poking out of the left side of her mouth as she worked. After 15 minutes the first chunk of bark was cleared. After it was peeled she popped the chunk in her mouth and began to gently nibble on the end. "That's my girl."

"She's a survivor that one." Aralia commented. I assumed my face showed as much relief as hers. "We shouldn't doubt her."

"I don't doubt her. I'm just worried." I muttered in response. A couch in the Mentor room has been vacated. I'd been on my feet too long and honestly felt exhausted. _I haven't felt this tired since my games… I hope she comes home soon. I hope she comes home period._ Slumping onto the couch I sat watching Mar with my hands on my knees. I didn't look like 'Finnick Odair Capitol Sweetheart.' I probably should be doing that job right now. Snow hasn't contacted me but that doesn't mean he isn't watching. Throwing my head in my hands for a moment I try to fight back my demons. _We've lost enough. Lost each other. Just one win. Please, that's all I'm asking. Just one…_

"Finnick, why don't you go home and get some rest? We'll watch over her." I looked up at Jackson, he flinched back ever so slightly. I didn't miss it though.

"Thank you Jackson. I think I will." My voice was a gentle as it could be. The man had done nothing but get in the way when I was in a dangerous frame of mind. I'm a wreck when my emotions take over. And maybe that's what's starting to happen again.

"No problem Finnick dear, we all want her home." A sad smile was shared between us as I stood. The sun was setting here and in the arena. Maybe I'll sleep tonight. _And maybe Mar will die if you do._ I hate you. _It's a possibility and you know it. Besides, I am you._ Please shut up. Aren't I stressed enough? _The games isn't even the hard part. That will happen if she gets out._ When. _If. Who knows how many of her orphans were killed. And she's not exactly modest about her feelings of resentment towards the Capitol._ I should have told her to be more careful… _Now her family might have paid the price. We'll have to see. If they did she'll hate you for sure._ Shut up. Please…

Finally making it to my apartment I looked around the empty room and I knew deep in my gut that things weren't going to get better any time soon. I hate giving into the voice in my head. I've been so close to dying so many times because of that voice. I've got people who still need me. Taking out a fifth of whisky I stare at the bottle. For once the voice is silent. Probably waiting to see what I'll do. Knowing how close I am to breaking. _It takes ten times as long to put yourself together as it does to fall apart._ The bottle is moved to my coffee table, just within reach. Should I need it. My crutch. _You're weak._ No. I'm scared and desperate.

That's much more dangerous.

Flitting in and out of consciousness. It wasn't sleep. At the slightest sound I'd be awake. It was simply stand by. There was nothing I could do but wait. It was better then what Mar was getting. Caesar's Morning recap of the nights events stated that much. Tension between the Careers was rising steadily. It was coming to a breaking point and it was going to happen soon. The sooner they killed each other the better. The guy from 9, Arlo is his name I think, he's struggling. Damn near starving. For someone from 9 he's strong. But the games seem to be getting to his head. His sanity isn't all there. He'll talk to himself regularly. I know how lonely it is in the games. But it's getting to a point where I think he's starting to hallucinate. He and Mar are currently close to each other. By close I mean with in a mile of each other. The Career's started out early today. But in the blowing wind they've been led directly back to the Cornucopia again. The four of them stumble upon their camp again.

"God dammit!"

"What the hell…"

"I thought you were supposed to be a good tracker Two."

"I am a good tracker thank you. I don't know if you've noticed but the wind is picking up!" The girls were at their wits end. Neither one of them were ones to rock the boat much. At least they hadn't been. They'd made it into the shelter of the Cornucopia and were able to lower their facemasks.

"Hell no he didn't notice his head is too far up his ass for that." The guy from Two was smirking.

"You got something to say to me Two!?"

"Did you not hear me?"

"Guys, calm down we said we'd break after we got the chick from Four." Devi was the peace keeper in the group. A peace keeper who actually wanted peace. It was different personality then usual. But she seemed smart enough. Her partner however was sick of it. He grabbed her and shoved her out of the way. The sudden movement caused everyone to instantly arm themselves. The girls were forgotten as the boys got ready to kill each other."

"Only one goes home right." Mace said with a smile. Daniel whipped a knife out and shot at Mace and he nodded.

"Yeah only one goes home." Then it started. It was every Career for themselves. Devi from One was still on the ground, shuffling back. Her ankle had twisted in the fall. Dalia from Two was too interested in seeing the results of the male fight to notice. Devi's eyes were wide with pain and fear. I think she just realized what the games really are. The two boys were hacking at each other violently. Mace brought his sword down with such force that and hit would no doubt kill Daniel. But the boy from One was nimble for his size and managed to dodge every hit. Both boys grunted and strained to kill the other.

"I should have." With a grunt Mace swung his sword. The force was impressive. It caused a dent in the shaft of Daniel's spear. "killed you" Daniel was unfazed by the force. His eyes wild on his target's frustration. Both boys were filled with rage. Daniel dipped to avoid a swing, he moved soon enough to only have his had be snagged by Mace's sword. "on the first night when you were sleeping." Daniel and Mace both had crazy smiles on their faces.

"Back at you." Panting Daniel moved on the offensive. Lunging forward with the spear. Mace dodged and swung his sword as Daniel was retreating. In an instant there was a snapping sound of metal. Daniel's spear had been sliced in two.

"I was always going to go home." Mace kicked Daniel in the stomach and the boy flew across the cornucopia. "It's my destiny."

"You should have killed me when you had the chance. Looks like it's going to cost you now." The words left Daniels mouth, a knife was flicked through the air. Mace managed to dive out of the way. Dalia how ever wasn't expecting any of this. It imbedded itself in her throat. The entire blade pointing out of the back of her neck. She was dead before she hit the ground. Silence. The camera's whipped around the four Careers. Their a myriad of expressions on their faces. A cannon signaled the death of the fallen tribute. Then a scream. Devi's jaw dropped and she shrieked in shock. The camera flicked from Mace's eyes which grew crazier by the second. And Daniels face as the remorse and regret faded to cold resolve. His hand wrapped around a handle. The type of weapon didn't matter. The stare down wasn't broken. Power anger and intensity filled the area. Devi lay forgotten on the floor as both boys charged.

Mace's sword lead his attack. Daniel swung his weapon at the same time. A ball and chain wrapped around the sword. With a good tug the two weapons flew out of both hands. The sword, flying straight into Devi's leg. Another cry in pain was forgotten as the two fought. Fist to fist. Hand to hand. Mace had Daniel beat in upper body strength. But Daniel had Mace beat in speed. As the two threw one another around Mace focused solely on Daniel. Every move. Every throw. Every hit. Both shredding layers in hopes for greater maneuverability. Mace's neck was bulging. Veins sticking out in a disgusting fashion. Daniel seemed more composed, but it could have all been an act. You can never tell. Daniel slipped on a patch of ice. This gave Mace the chance to grab the tribute and fling him into a wall. Daniel's body fell limp next to Devi. She hadn't died yet. She would be though. Daniel had less then 30 seconds to react. He ripped the sword from Devi's leg, swung at Mace. Severing The rest of his partner's leg. The motion managed to catch Mace's throat as well. Blood now covered the three. In the momentum of his movement Mace continued forward. The camera moved to behind Daniel we were able to watch the light fade from Mace's eyes. Daniel rolled out of the way. The dead tribute hit the wall his cannon. Following close behind. Panting Daniel finally notices his tribute. She's paling faster by the second.

"You were never going home, Devi. It was fun screwing around with you though." Betrayal and pain crossed across the blonds face. "Did you honestly expect anything different?" The camera panned in close on her desperate face as well as the cruel smirk that was lacing his. "You're still sexy as hell when you're pissed. Too bad you're dying. I could use another cheap screw." Her last breath followed seconds later by a cannon. And then another…..

Finnick's POV

"...Mar..." watching every screen at once waiting to see who the cannon belonged to. She can't make it to the final three and then die. She's almost home. I felt every ounce of me shatter as I looked desperate to see her face. One of the cameras cut to a clearing near the Cornucopia the boy from Nine laid bleeding on the ground. His machete in his throat. Mar was bent over panting slightly. He was a lot bigger then her. She must have struggled. Why wouldn't they have showed her fight?! She could be hurt. God please don't let her be hurt...

The camera cut away from Mar. I was before the TV screen. Hardly breathing. Daniel was still covered in blood. His grin was demonic. Soon he was sprinting towards where Mar was. It took him 5 minutes to reach the clearing. The idiot was whooping and hollering the whole time, so she knew he was coming. Both panting.

"You ready to die Four?" The screen flicked to Mar's eyes. They were cold. Calm.

"Are you?" He let out a bark of laughter while lunging his spear. Mar rolled out of the way effectively. "I'd expect better aim from a Career." Why are you taunting him Mar. What the hell are you thinking. They circled each other. Neither took the role of prey. Both predators, waiting for their time to pounce. The spear lodged itself in a tree 100 yards behind Mar. That would have run her through if she hadn't moved.

"Still a mouthy bitch."

"You're still a cocky prick." At that he launched another spear. He had used two of his three. She dropped again. He groaned. From either pain or frustration. It's hard to tell.

"I'm going home Four. I have to." Who was he trying to convince? Mar or himself?

"Why? To be rich?" Mar scoffed at the thought.

"To bring pride to my district and prove to everyone that I am good enough to win." His chest puffed out as he spoke. Mar let out a laugh. A true breathy laugh. She shook her head as they both circled each other. He held on to his last spear. Mar had the machete from the District Nine tribute. God I hope that's not her only weapon...

"In what world is being a murderer ever a good thing?" Daniel lunged again. "Life is sacred. How can you be proud of taking that?" Mar's voice was growing louder by the second. She wasn't attacking. Strictly defense.

"Being strong enough to win is something I will always be proud of."

"No one ever wins the Hunger Games. Their are survivors but no winners. All any of this proves is we are murders." Dammit Mar, don't say shit like that on live TV!

"It proves I'm the strongest!" He stood tall in front of Mar, She met his glare with one of her own.

"It proves you are a heartless idiot." Daniel started to advance on Mar, eyes darker then night.

"For that Four, I am going to make your death slow and painful." Hatred in every aspect of his expression. Mar smirked. Smirked.

"Good luck with that." God dammit Mar! do you have to antagonize him WITH your sexy voice?!

"That's it!" and the action began. Daniel was swinging his spear. It clashed again and again against Mar's machete. "Running away Four? Scared of death?"

"If it's my time it's my time." She breathed coolly.

"It is your time! I promise you that!" They met in the middle spear forcing against her machete. They both pushed with all their might. Mar leaned into his face.

"Prove it." More rage contorted on his features as Daniel went face first into the snow. Mar had dropped to the side. Swiping him with the edge of the blade. It was only a nick but any wound is bound to slow a person down eventually. Groaning in pain Daniel lashed out again. This time his target made his mark. She had been watching each move. The gears in her mind were moving. In an instant he had pinned Mar to the ground. Spear in her shoulder. Her scream brought me to my knees.

Mar's POV

I've been stabbed before. He was getting off on this. I could tell. Clenching my jaw as tight as I could. I'm not giving this bastard the satisfaction. Still the pain became every inch of me. His smirk told me even as I fought this is what he wanted to see. "You weren't right handed were you?" Daniel coed. Shoving the spear further into my shoulder blade. I didn't scream until he began to twist the spear in my flesh. It was white hot. Even in the freezing temperatures. I was burning inside and out. He finally dug through the last bit of my bone. The spear embedded in the snow below My scream of agony rang through out the arena. The world was spinning. If it was pain or blood loss I don't know.

"Not so talkative now are you, you mouthy bitch." I spit on him. It took every ounce of strength that I have but I did it. His response was a smirk and leaning further on the spear. It moved in and out of the hole he had dug through my arm. He kept moving the spear in and out. It was a numb but searing hot pain. I don't know how long he was torturing me like that. But he grew bored. The whole time I'd been pinned into the snow. "Oh stop crying I thought you were supposed to be strong!" his superiority was ridiculous. He clearly thought he won. You have a spear pinning you to the fucking ground! Through your fucking shoulder! Another rush of nausea his me. "I've got a great way to shut you up. You and I are going to have some fun." He unzipped his coat. The world was blurring again. Blue and green spots were everywhere. I heard his clothes ruffle in between the sound of my heart as it hammered in my ears. His gloved hand yanked off my face mask. His smile said it all. "Come on now open your mouth like a good little whore." His knees straddled my neck as he got in position. Nothing but rage and disgust filled me. Turning my head away I fought as best as I could. It wasn't very well. "If you suck me off good I'll make it quick." He coaxed. If this fuck, thinks I'm going to give into this shit on live FUCKING television then his is out of his fucking mind. He grabbed my nose clearly frustrated. I was panting in pain and opened my mouth with in seconds. A second was all he needed. He shoved his pathetic excuse of a penis in my mouth and started thrusting. Focus Mar. You aren't taking this shit. This is the opening. He hit the back of my throat and with ever ounce of strength I had left I clenched my jaw. The flesh from his member tangled in my teeth. It was disgusting. His blood and skin soon filled my mouth. A scream of pain left his lips, while he lunged back in pain I shoved my hips forward and pushed him away. Desperately grabbing the spear, I ripped it out of my shoulder. I can't be pinned down. The minimal amount of food I'd eaten came up. I crawled, dragging my arm away. Daniel was screaming in pain. I'd spit his dick out the second I could. There were still pieces in my mouth. The thought made me gag and heave a second time. I bit his dick off. That has to be the craziest thing I've ever done.

"You fucking bitch! You bit my dick off!" I heaved up nothing again. Gasping for air.

"That thing was too small to be a dick." Even with a hole in your shoulder you still manage to be sarcastic. Looking at the pathetic boy with disgust and anger. Even now it turned to pity. "Now say please and I'll end your suffering."

"Fuck you! I'll fucking kill you!" he was still laying on the ground where I threw him. I piled clean snow into my mouth to try and wash away the taste. There was so much blood. With ragged breathing I moved to sit on my heels. Every movement was torture. My arm hung as dead weight. Still attached while gravity helped force the wound to tare more. We were only five feet apart. Looking around I noticed the pool of blood beneath him.

"The only thing you are going to do is bleed to death." He looked my way and started pulling his body towards me. "the more you move the faster you'll die."

"I'm not going to die!"

"Yes you will." My panting was hard and fast. His meeting mine. Am I a bad person for being happy that he is in pain? I still can't believe I actually bit his dick OFF. That's just crazy. Another bout of spins took over and I struggled to keep my eyes focused. "And while you do I'll pray for your soul that you may find peace in the after life, even though right now I'm not sorry you are dying. But I have a hard time mourning the death of rapists."

"Fuck you!" he grabbed snow and tried to throw it. "You're a mouthy fucking bitch you deserved what's coming to you!"

"And why is that? What have I ever done to you? You attacked me asshole!"

"You think you're better then me. But you are nothing but district four trash."

"Yes I am trash..." Taking a deep breath to calm myself I looked at the dying blond. He really is clueless... "Let me ask you this. You are willing to do anything for yourself, but what about the people you love?" his face dropped and eyes widened at that. I faced him square on, letting anger bubble up. Remembering all the thing's I've had to do to stay alive. to protect them. "I starve for my family. I steal for my family. I've killed for my family. To keep them fed. Keep them alive."

"All I need is myself." There is the fear. "You're stupid and weak."

"You are sad and selfish. And here you are dying. Alone." Lifting my left arm gesturing at the cold. I turned back to him and leaned closer. "How does that feel?"

"Why the fuck do you care?!" in his eyes were tears. And pain and fear. This guy just tried to rape you. There has to be some humanity left. How embarrassing this must be for his family. This shouldn't be the last things he says.

"I want to believe you have the capacity for compassion. You are dying."

"I'm not going to die but you fucking are." He roared clawing his way closer again. Fueled by anger.

"Look at the snow." I nodded towards him "That's your blood." He grit his teeth but kept trying to crawl forward. Face paling

"I just have to kill you, then I'll get medical attention. The capitol will save me. I'll be the greatest Victor ever." You are dying and power is all you think of?

"Do you know how you get an erection?"

"What the fuck does tha madder?" it won't be long now. His muscular arms started to falter.

"A large amount of blood is forced into your dick. That's why it gets hard. You've lost at least 2 pints of blood already. It's surprising you are still conscious."

"Shuddup" he'd stopped moving. Face partially covered in snow. Hands still stretched. What a pathetic scene. Give him the chance to say good bye...

"If you have any one you want to say goodbye to, I would do it now." You don't have much longer.

"You arn bedder den me."

"Nor do I pretend to be. I'm human. That's all any of us are."

"Urr a stooped bishh" this guy really is this pathetic? There has to be more to him.

"I hope you find peace where ever it is you are going."

"Shuddup bish uoo ant nuffin" his voice was faltering. Eyes fluttering open and closed.

"Would you like me to tell your family anything?" my voice was soft. I can't and won't cry for this kind of a person. But someone loves this person.

"Urr a murrerer" the cannon echoed throughout the arena. Sitting back with my eyes closed I tried to breathe.

"Yes I am." A tear streamed down my cheek. Not for him. But for all of the lives that were lost this week. For all of the death there has been and all of the death that will come by the hands of the capitol .

"Ladies and gentlemen may I introduce the winner of this year's Hunger Games! Marjorie Scur!" Claudius' voice barely registers. A ladder appears in front of me. I'm still slumped slightly on the ground. Blood loss taking it's toll. It's a miracle I'm still breathing... I manage to reach the bottom rung. Gripping it to the best of my ability. A current runs through me and quickly paralyses my body. I lift from the ground and, I know I'm going home. But my gut tells me the real games have just begun. I just want to hold the kids again. I'll get to soon. Doubt still creeps in as I remember the ghosts I'm bringing with me. I hope they will still have me...


	5. Tidal Waves

Finnick's POV

She did it. She did it. _She's coming home. My Marmaid is coming home…_

" _Oh my god…."_

"She did it!"

"Oh Finnick dear she did it!"

" SHE'S COMING HOME!" cheers erupted from the area. They showed Mar coming out of the arena. In an instant I was sprinting towards the remake center hospital. They were preparing for her arrival. Jackson and Aralia joined in my pacing. Euripides too excited about the capitol party he would now be able to attend. Peacekeepers soon flanked each side. I stood protectively in front of Mags.

"President Snow requests your presence."

"My tribute is about to be delivered from the arena."

"Are you coming willingly?" The masked person asked with out remorse or feeling. They were his puppets. _We all are…_ I took a deep breathe and followed the white clad assholes on the way to Snow. He sat in the same office. The sent of roses choking me before the door even opened. _Mar will know to hate that smell soon as well._

"Congratulations Mr. Odair, on bringing home your tribute. Quite a telling and powerful young woman." His eyes had yet to meet mine. This man is evil incarnate. And he's about to sink his fangs into the woman I love… _I love her. She's coming home._ I managed a smile. A true smile. A cough brought me back to reality. I was in the company of one of the most dangerous men in the world. Showing him just how much she could hurt me. "There are things we must discuss Mr. Odair. I assume you know that they way your tribute has acted is unacceptable ."

"Yes sir, I do."

"She has quite a lot of damage to clean up if she wants to live long enough to enjoy the spoils of being a victor."

"She won the games sir. You have to have a victor don't you?" A dangerous glint entered his eyes.

"Not necessarily Mr. Odair." _God dammit_

"What do I have to do?"

"Corrective action has already been taken on Ms. Scur. Her orphanage suffered an unfortunate fire. Surprisingly most of the children made it." The clear annoyance hinted that this had not been part of his plan. "but many of them have sustained serious damage. They have no home now."

"You'll let them live with Mar." Lips twisting in a sinister smug fashion. Apparently that's exactly what he wanted me to say.

"Of course I will. They are her family after all. Now. What you need to do Mr. Odair is make sure she understands how things work here." My stomach dropped. "The life of her family is depending on it." Swallowing the lump in my throat and the overwhelming desire to punch his wrinkled face. _Make it as bloody on the outside as it is on the inside._ "She has arrived in surgery Mr. Odair. Off you go." Grinding my teeth I sent a respectful nod. Sprinting back to the hospital of the remake center. Half out of excitement, and half out of anger. _He's threatening my Marmaid and her family. I don't care who he is. No one gets to do that.._

Aralia, Mags, Jackson and Euripides were all sitting in the waiting room. Euripides shot up and began chirping in an overexcited fashion. _Don't strangle the escort. Don't strangle the escort._ Aralia shared my irritation. Mags gave her a reassuring squeeze. The _please don't kill him here_ squeeze.

"She's in surgery"

"How bad Leah?"

"Could be worse. She was breathing on her own when they brought her in."

"She has lost a lot of blood. Her shoulder looked so…." Jackson's paling face left a clear message. _It could be worse but it was still bad._

"Have they told you anything?"

"Not yet." Sending a nod Aralia's way I focused on the door in front of us. _My Marmaid is behind that door. And she actually gets to be mine…_

It's been 5 hours. 300 minutes of pacing. 18,000 seconds of agony. Waiting. I don't believe in god or anything spiritual like our ancestors did. At least we are told they did. With how shitty Panem is. There's no point in thinking about this stuff. Right now, I wish I had something… some one… somewhere else to look. _She could be dead._ She can't be dead. _It's been five hours._ It's the Capitol they bring people back from the dead. _They kill more then they save._ They need their Victor. _Snow needs his new pawn._ He needs her alive.

 _For now._

When the doors finally opened I body checked the doctor. It was not planned. _Why would I want to hit the guy who is saving Mar's life?_ But I hate waiting. The others asked him every question imaginable. I held his gaze. Eyes firm. The doctor shrunk under the intensity.

"She's alive, but the damage done to her shoulder was extensive. She was lucky to get here when she did."

"When?" my words didn't seem like they belonged to me. That my voice could be so hard and broken.

"You can go see her now. The nurse will explain further. Please excuse me." The Man squirmed away. My eyes trained on the door before me. _She's behind this door…_

Then I'm in front of a sickly thin woman. She is lying unconscious on bright white bed in her overly sterile room. Despite the burn of the bleach still hanging in the air, the blood was still there. _Her_ blood. Taking her hand in mine I sat on the side of her bed. _"I need you…."_ to the left of her bed sat a vase. Filled with Snow's white roses. The vase was quickly disposed of via the aposing wall. The shattered glass called all the others to the room. I stared at the comatose love of my life.

They are keeping her in a medically induced coma. Her shoulder blade needs to be rebuilt. It's what's taking so long I guess. Things haven't been quiet while we were waiting. They tried to do a full body polish on her. The whole team and I damn near tore apart the doctor who mentioned it. She was decorated in scars. They spanned every part of her body according to Aralia. I want to see them all. Kiss every inch of this beautiful amazing woman and show her how amazing she is. How inspiring. How loved. I stay as long as they let me. I'd sell my soul to Snow to keep her safe. To let me stay with her. I need to see her eyes open. Hear her voice. _God I'm desperate…._ But this is my Marmaid. We're finally going to be together again. _And this is just the beginning._

I flirt my way into her room each night. Side stepping each incriminating question. I am Finnick Odair Capitol Darling. Smirking at the thought.

I'm not supposed to fall in love.

' _Oops…'_

Mar's POV

Warm or cold. They are the only things I know. My warmth comes a lot but it still goes away. I don't know why it's leaving but I wish it wouldn't. I'm safe when I'm warm. I know it. I've tried stopping it a few times. But my body isn't cooperating. I'm a lead shell. Might as well be dead for as useful as I'm being. I know I'm not though. The dead can't feel. And I feel warmth.

Finnick's POV

I woke up with Mar in my arms for the 7th night in a row. Preparations have been made and the people are getting antsy. They'll force her awake today. But they were forcing her to be in a coma so maybe she's been awake. It doesn't matter. I should see her open her eyes today. Her life as a victor starts today. It's a mix of dread and excitement. I get her back today, but so does the capitol. At least with the stunt she pulled as her final kill none of the men appear willing to risk the safety of their dicks. Highlights from her whole games has been on constant reruns. I cringe every time.

We've talked strategy, the team and I. Aralia and Jackson are making her interview dress. It's mostly to fill the time. Nothing will be set in stone. Nothing matters until Mar wakes up. We don't know what her mental state is going to be. That's what scares me the most. Who is she going to be? The Mar I knew growing up was gone a long time ago. I'm just scared. What if she doesn't let me be there for her. I'll have to watch her breaking and not be able to do anything about it. She's already suffered so much. And she understands. God she knows. I won't be alone anymore. _I won't be alone..._

Mar's POV

My warmth was back. It hadn't left in a while. I'd been trying to open my eyes to see what it was. But my body had a mind of its own. This is a nice place though. Wherever I am. I can't remember how I got here. There's no way for me to leave either. I tried to get out to see my warmth. But no dice. I'm just here. I wonder if this is me now. Something... bad had happened. It was cold and painful. No, painful isnt a strong enough word. I don't... know... I have to get home though. _I have to._ How do I get there from here? I've been blown a shore.

' _We are two poor wayward orphans who washed up in the Capitol from District four..._ Who's voice is that?

 _'Mama don't go!'_ That girl sounds so scared... why would her mother leave her? Why do I feel guilty?

 _'I always keep my promises.'_ Is that my voice?

 _'He said he was just lonely and wanted some company'_ my stomach churned at those words joined the growing chorus of sounds bouncing around me.

 _'What makes you think you can touch me bitch?!'_ It was mostly the same voice. That's me..?

 _'This is really happening. You're really dying...'_ someone died. Someone important. Someone I love is dead.

 _'Come back to me Marmaid.'_ My warmth. That man's voice echoed the loudest among the others. Soon it was all I could hear.

Finnick's POV

"Come back to me Marmaid." She was taken off the medicine two days ago. She still hasn't woken up yet. I haven't left. Once. I'm getting desperate. Legitimately losing my mind desperate. I haven't slept in 23 hours. The last time I did it was because Aralia slipped me some sedative instead of coffee. To say I was pissed was an understatement. Mar still wasn't awake though... if it weren't for her chest rising with each breath... _she could be dead_. She hasn't responded to anything I've been saying. "God, Mar please... please come back to me... _please..._ " _She might not even be in there anymore Odair. Get it together._ I'd help her. _If she'll let you._ I'll protect her and her family. With everything I am. _She doesn't need or want your help._ I need her. _When did you get so pathetic?_ I'm always pathetic, I'm just... not lying to myself right now...

Mar's POV

My eyes finally open and Im pissed. Where ever I am It's brighter then the sun. I had to fight just to open my eyes, then I get the sun hanging 3 feet in front of me. Yeah. Not happy about that. Scowl fully formed I opened my eyes again. Lifting my arms is also difficult. _What the actual fuck?_ My left arm moves with out any problems. My right arm feels like someone is laying on it. Tugging didn't get the weight to move. _What do I do now?_ Hit it? Yup I'm hitting it. Swinging back I used all my force and hit the lump holding my arm down. Bad decision..

"FUCK!" _My voice sounds like shit. What the fuck is going on. Where the hell am I?!_ My eyes still won't focus. Fear is mixing with my frustration. _I think I broke my hand._ What the hell is going on! _I-i-i-I can't move. I want to go home. I want to go home._ Swinging repeatedly at the lump with every thing I had. Tears streaming down my face. A males voice grunted and groaned. I don't know who that is. Panic flared giving me more strength than I expected. The man started saying things.

"Mar stop. Mar calm down. Mar it's me. Mar it's Finnick. Your safe. You're here with me."

"Who the fuck are you?!" Just breathing hurt. My throat was so dry. But I'm not safe. Not here. _Mostly cause I don't know where 'here' is._ So I'm screaming. Thrashing. Fighting. _If this bastard thinks I'm letting this fly, on national telivision no less, then he has another thing coming._ I need an opening. But I can't see. Soon the man has me pinned beneath him. My breathing is short and ragged. His legs strattle my waist, effectivly pinning my arms. His hands clamp my shoulder and mouth. Tears prick from my useless eyes and the mans grip instantly softens. Fingers run through my hair gently and sweet words are whispered.

"Mar. Mar? It's Finnick. It's your sharkfin. Do... do you remember me?" I didn't or couldn't respond. My breathing rate picked up. I don't know this person. "Hey hey hey hey. Mar I'm - I'm sorry I scared you. I'd never hurt you. You're safe with me Mar. I swear on my life, I'll do anything to protect you." He is either really good at lying or he's being honest. I still can't see shit. It's frustrating as hell and I'm scared. But in the back of my head there is a voice whispering softly that I am safe. Safe with him. Whoever he is. A broken sob leaves my lips.

"Wh-wh-where am I?" The man took a sharp breath.

"Do you know who I am Mar?"

"Who is Mar?! Is is that my n-n-name?"

"Y-yes it is. M-m-marjorie Louise S-sc-ur." _Marjorie Louise Scur. Eat. Now._ That voice was different. A rich baritone compaired to the smooth voice of the man on top of me. They aren't the same person. Then who are they?

"W-wh-who?" I hate feeling weak. That's all I am. In this moment. Weak. Lost. I'm not supposed to be this way. I'm not supposed to be this way.

Finnick's POV

She wouldn't look at me. She was shaking. Terrified... of _me_. _She doesn't know who you are._ "Mar... Mar. Look... look at me please.." my voice was barely above a whisper. I cupped her face gently. She was blinking like it was too bright. _She hasn't opened her eyes in over a week you idiot._ I smacked my head. "Hold on, I'll be right back." I breathed. I wasn't comforting her at all. Her face said that much. But hopefully this would help.

The lights were dimmed, window shades all closed. I squinted through the dark towards the bed and she seemed to relax a bit. Walking back over slowly her eyes started to adjust a bit. Each move I made was deliberate and clear. She moved away from me and a part of my heart cracked.

"I know you won't believe me Mar, but I would never hurt you okay?" My hands up, voice soft. She relaxed further. "Do you believe me?"

"No..." her voice was soft and unsure. I nodded softly. Swallowing the lump in my throat.

"That's... that's okay..."

Mar's POV

His voice sounded hurt. His eyes. I know those. The color, made me relax. It felt safe. He watched me carefully. Like I might break. _Why would I break?_ Another voice sounded in the back of my head.

 _It's. It's too fucking much okay! You're keeping me together Al. You always call my bullshit. Always push back. No one else has the balls to do that Al. How. How am I supposed to keep my promise?! Why would you? You know that trying to do this is going to tear me apart!_

"Where is Al?" My brother. "He's-he's-he's...?"

"He's dead Mar... do you.. do you know where you are?" My eyes started to water. My breathing rate picked up. Lungs constricting. Shaking my head violently. "Hey hey hey. Shhhh. It's okay Mar, you're safe. I swear you are." He gently cupped my face. He leaned forward. Face close to mine. I know you.

"I _know_ you..." my eyes leaking profusely. He nodded with a sad smile as well.

"You do. Very well. We grew up together." He took a deep breath. "We were both the babies." He sniffed and laughed. "I was an only child. And you had yourbig sister. Ka-"

"Karielle..." his smile was soft and sad. "You... had an older cousin... named Jayce..." my eyes softened as I remember. A little red headed girl being chased by a blond boy on the beach. Then four children all laughing together "they... made fun of us. Said we'd grow up and get married..." i brought my gaze back to him. Taking in every inch of his face. The stubble growing on his chin. The bags under his eyes. The desperation. "They... they are both dead... aren't they?" His nod was soft and short.

"For about three years."

"Jayce died at sea?" A nod. "Kari... died giving birth... oh my god Ari! Where is Arianna! Is she okay?! I have to see her! Where is she?!"

"Hey. Hey. Hey. She's safe at home okay?" My face was in his hands again. _How do you know?_ He doesn't.

"I need to get home. I need to get home. Now Finnick."

"We can't yet Mar. You need to get better first." I shook my head violently

"I don't matter Finn. They do. They need me Finnick. I need to go!" He took a sharp breath. Resting his forehead against mine.

"You are the most important person in my world." _What is he stupid?_

"Your life must really suck.." he laughed bitterly. Removing his forehead he sent me a sad smile. Beautiful face just... broken.

"It does..." his eyes traced my face with a tiny lazy smile. "But _you_ make it worth living." My eyes furrowed as he leaned in. Something snapped him out of his daze. "Are you hungry Mar?" I shook my head. He nodded. "Will you take a bite or two of some applesauce? You really need to try. You haven't eaten solid food in over a week." _The Games._ That doesn'tmake sense. I ate solid food a bunch of times. _Wait. My shoulder._ Lifting my gown I looking at my once damaged joint. There's a killer scar. I started to trace the lines. "They wanted to give you a full body polish. I wouldn't let them. I know how much you liked your scars."

"How...?"

"It's the Capitol... You've been in a coma for 8 days. They kept you under so the medicine could work and you wouldn't agitate the wound while it heals." It was so... it didn't hurt.. but. I still remember feeling the spear shoved through my shoulder. If I close my eyes and I'm there. Opening them I'm back with Finnick. There's no spear. Just the remnants of where it was. "Mar...?"

"I can feel it." I breathed. Looking up at Finnick terrified. "If I close my eyes I can feel it." He nodded quickly.

"It's going to be like that for a long time babe. But it gets easier... after time..." his hand was in mine. Thumb tracing my knuckles. "You won't be alone, though. I'll be here. And Mags. We'll take care of you. Promise."

Mar's POV

It's been another week and eating still hurts like a son of a bitch. I still can't have anything too rich. But luckily I can have vegetables. I've fallen in love with them. We don't have many in Four. They are gentle on my stomach and _so good._ Finnick has been prepping me for my interviews tomorrow afternoon. I'm going to watch my games... on live telivision...

"Mar, are you with me?" _Finnick._

 _"No."_ I grunted out. Crossing my arms. I don't want to think or talk about this. I want to go home.

"Mar... I know you are tired..."

" _Tired?!_ " My eyes snapped alert. Finnick pinched his nose. "I'm more then _tired_ Finnick."

"Mar. I know what you are going through. I did this two years ago. I'm here to help you. I _need_ you to to pay attention."

"This is stupid Finnick!"

"Your image is _everything_ Mar! You need them to love you."

"So I can be a sex slave?!"

"So you can stay _alive!"_

"Why does it matter so much?! I'm already dead." He put his head in his hands "I _feel_ dead Finnick! I feel cold! I'm always so cold!" Tears started to pool and shivers started wracking my body. My arms flew to my sides. Finnick's soon joining. My head sliding under his chin. His fingers ran through my treated hair. The once messy strands had been soaked in chemicals and is now silky smooth. We'd gone back and forth every day since I woke up. "I'm so scared Finnick. What if, _what if I say something wrong?"_ I started shaking. "If they died because of _me..."_

Finnick's POV

 _You already have..._ grabbing her and pulling her close. I kissed her forehead repeatedly. Rocking her back and forth. _No matter what I do she'll be hurt._

"I love you Mar... So much. So so so much." If I hold her close enough maybe I can hide her from the world. _From Snow._ Tears prickling at my eyes. _She makes me cry so much. It breaks my heart seeing her like this._ She's muttering to herself. I don't know what though. "Mar, baby?" Her face was buried in my chest. She turned slightly and I could start to hear her.

 _"Lying in the long long grass. Blossom on the trees. Springtime's slipping away my love. Yeah springtime's slipping away. When it comes around again. It will never be the same. Heaven's slipping away my love. Yeah heaven's slipping away. Yeah heaven's slipping away"_ a sad smile played on my lips as she sang.

 _"Walking through this changing season. Sorrow spreads it's wings. We can't keep a hold on time. Just receive what it brings."_ That's all life is, dealing with what you are given.

 _"Lying in the long long grass. Clouds are drifting by. Springtime's slipping away my love. Yeah springtime's slipping away. Dreaming in this lost domain. Which you'll never see again. Heaven's slipping away my love. Yeah heaven's slipping away. Yeah heaven's slipping away"_

"I won't ever slip away babe." She didn't reply. Just kept singing.

 _"Walking through this changing season. Sorrow spreads it's wings. Light a candle in your heart. Light it to the spring. Walking through this changing season. Sorrow spreads it's wings. We can't keep a hold on time. Just recieve what it will bring"_ I don't know where her mind is. But it's not here. Our Mom's sang this to us when we were younger. I rested my head against hers. My deeper voice blended with hers perfectly as I started to sing.

 _"Mellow evenings in the spring. Full of warmth and hope. You are dreaming unaware. Unaware that you are letting go_

 _Walking through this changing season. Sorrow spreads it wings. We can't keep a hold on time. Just recieve what it will bring. Walking through this lonely season. Sorrow spreads it's wings. Light a candle in your heart. Light it to the spring_

 _Springtime's slipping away my love. Yeah springtime's slipping away. Heaven's slipping away my love. Yeah heaven's slipping away."_ Her breathing had calmed. We were both relaxed, a rare treat. She snuggled closer.

"I can't hurt them Finnick... I can't." I pulled her head away. Sorrow and pain in my heart.

"Mar... you can't save them." Hurt flashed across her features. "You _can't_ babe." She started to shake again. But I can't keep lying to her. "You can't control Snow love. And he's the only way to guarantee their safety."

"I-I-If I-I do what h-h-he wants?"

"There's a good chance the others will be okay. But I need you to focus for me so that we can make sure there aren't any more slip ups."

Mar's POV

 _There have been slip ups?_ My eyes furrowed and searched his face for answers. "What slip ups?" He ran his hand through his hair. Letting me go and sitting back. His eyes held regret. "What slip ups Finnick?!"

"You questioned the games... And the Capitol Mar... You... refused the generosity of the Capitol. You _refused_ a Capitol gift."

"They are fucking sick Finnick!" Belting the words out without a second thought.

"That!" He whisper yelled "is what is going to get more of your loved ones killed!" _More..._ regret flashed again. He didn't plan to tell me that. _Who died?_

"What the hell happened Finnick!?" He took a deep shuttered breathe. I pinned him to the floor with ease. He didn't fight. "ANSWER ME!" He wouldn't meet my eyes.

" _...there was a fire..."_ my heart stopped. He kept speaking but I stopped listening. A _fire._ Closing my eyes I felt the heat.

 _Kari and I were late for dinner. But I had woven and cast my first net today. Mom and Dad had no idea. They've been so busy with work, Kari and I wanted to surprise them with extra fish for dinner. We were laughing as we ran to the house. Beaming with pride I held a 5 pound salmon while running along the familiar path. Finnick would be soooo jealous. I laughed excited to brag to my best friend. My prized catch was soon laying in the dirt as we saw the smoke rising from our street. Kari ran ahead trying to find a way to stop the fire. It raged so hot. Then we heard the screaming. Our parents wailed in agony. Kari ripped moss from a near by rock. She shoved it into my ears. I couldn't hear them anymore. Kari rocked me back and fourth as our lives burned to the ground. No one was around. No neighbors even bothered to help. We were completely alone. When the flames turned to embers Kari let go. Tears and soot covered our faces. Two Peacekeepers appeared grabbing us each by the arms. I looked back at the smoldering remains of our house. Kari looked forward; And she never looked back._

 _Fire became my greatest fear. Who had it taken from me this time?_

"Mar? M-m-mar I'm I'm sorry... I-I-I-I should have warned you." His voice was soft and pleading. He felt guilty I know he did. But his regret isn't going to do shit for me.

"Yes. You should have." My voice was cold. I shoved him away. Sick to my stomach. He kept talking. I wasn't listening. I stormed into my room and lost it. Sobbing uncontrollably. I slammed on the floor. Screamed at the top of my lungs. Agony. Death. Betrayal. Everything. "Al..." my lungs were raw much like they had been two nights before the games. "Ah-hal I need you. I ne-need you so ba-hadly. But you aren't here... you aren't here..." my arms wrapped tightly around my body. "They're dead because of me. Because Finnick didn't _tell_ me. _Why_ wouldn't he tell me?! I need you Al... I... I don't know what to do...I can't do this without you. I'm not strong enough..." ' _then figure out how to be dammit!'_ Al's voice echoed in the empty parts of my heart. _I need to find the strength..._ I don't know when... or how. I'll be weak and scared... just for tonight.

Finnick's POV

 _You. Fucking. Idiot._ Still sitting on my knees I dropped to the floor. Banging my head against the floor. Mar's screams were clear as day. I'd promised to be there for her. And dammit I need to try. Opening the door, it wasn't locked... still wouldn't open. Must be baricaded with something - a dresser I'm guessing - I could try to break it down but... what's the point ? She's crying and wailing because of _me._

She started crying for Al... I couldn't breathe. Each ragged gasp stabbed with bitter regret. I could leave. Go get drunk. Passout. But I promised... this is my fault. I curled into a ball beside her door. Listening to her sobs and screams. Mine silently joining.

She'd stopped screaming. At least I think she had. Im not sure. I could hear them echoing in my head. I don't think I've been this broken since I got home... not even after my first client... the sound of wood scraping against wood made me jump. She opened the door and meet my eyes.

"I know you're sorry." Her eyes softened and a sliver of hope grew. While continuing her eyes slowly hardened. "But I'm not. So save it." She hissed the last words. Arms crossed tightly across her chest. She looked to Euripides. "How long till the celebration?" She held herself with so much authority. Euripides gaped a bit. Her look turned into a glare as the seconds slipped on. "

"Umm, we have about four hours."

"So I was screaming all night?" I couldn't form words. Euripides managed a weak nod. "I'm going to shower. Then" jabbing a finger towards Euripides. Said man jumped at the action. Her scowl was intimidating me. He was smart not to soeak. "I need you and Aralia to help get me camera ready." A short nod was shared between the two. Mar's eyes hardened again "You _will_ keep any and all comments to _yourself_." With that she turned from Al's old room and headed towards hers. Back straight, shoulders squared and broken in every way possible.

Mar's POV

Euripides had taken the smart route and kept silent while he helped me clean up. He'd answer any question I asked, but that was it. If we were in a different world, I'd beat myself up about being such an unbareable bitch. I just can't find it in me to care right now.

"Victory celebration and dinner tonight?"

"Y-y-yes."

"When is Aralia coming?"

"I'm right here." Turning towards the door she stood with a garment bag. Her voice was soft and sad. Taking a deep breathe trying to bite back the insult that's hanging on the tip of my tongue. _It's not their fault. They are his pawns as much as I am._ After several beats of awkward silence my mouth started moving on it's own.

"Do you know who he killed?" They both stoppedat the same time. No one moved. So they knew _something._ No one spoke thought. "Dammi-"

"Ruddy, Dedreick and Arianna are all alive. They were the people who were interviewed for the final 8. I-I don't know anything else..." Euripides was the one to cut off my budding verbal attack. _Not who I expected..._ Aralia can't even look me in the eye... Their sympathy gave me no comfort. I was pissed. _They are just trying to help you Mar._ I can hear Al scolding me. He was always the kinder one. We stayed quiet for the rest of the prep time.

I was hearded out of the room every one msking there way to the remake center for the 3 hour cerimony.

"You're going to come up last." Finnick was explaining. "I'll come on stage right before you. Arali-"

"Will you stay with me?" I couldn't make eye contact. Not with anyone. But I was terrified. Nerves and dread growing with each inch we moved closer to the remake center. My voice was small and pathetic. Just how I felt. Finnick was looking at me. I could feel it.

"They... uh they've been speculating we are in an...uh _relationship_..."

"If you don't want to then say no Odair." My voice dropping at least fifty degrees in tonal temperature. Nose snarling at the rejection.

" _That's not_ it Mar." I heard his hair shuffle, probably shaking his head. "I just..." his voice was soft. Not out of pity, but fear. "I don't know if you will get in trouble if I do. We-we both have images to keep up..." voice dropping to the same broken sound I'd uttered before. _He's just as trapped as I am._

"Can you stay with me back stage?" I glanced his way. He nodded with a gentle smile. I think he knew I need him right now. "I'm really scared... what...? _What if I say something wrong Finnick..?"_ The nerves picked up again. Finnick grabbed my hand before I could start my panic attack. The contact helped. His hands were still course. The same hands thst held me less then three werks ago. _I can't even imagine kissing him right now. Being with him... I wouldn't even want him if Al was here. But he isn't._ His eyes were trained on me as I tried getting a grip.

"I know I'm not who you want..."

"You've cost me a lot Finnick." Anger seeping back in to my heart. "I don't know how much because I don't even _know_ who died." Tension filled our limo. Any 'moment' we'd had was over. I wasn't letting go of his hand.

"Can you ever-"

"I don't know. But I need you right now so shut _up_ and do your _job_." His hand squeezed mine. I don't know what the gesture was for. Neither of us let go. He helped me out of the limo. Keeping a firm grip. _It's good I might fall over if he didn't._

 _'Thank you... I swear these shoes will kill me before the tributes get to.'_

Tears pricked at my eyes remembering the similar moment Al and I shared at the tribute parade. Finnick pulled me in to a short hug and kissed my forehead. "You're doing great Mar."

"I miss him." I breathed into Fin's shirt. He still manages to smell like home. Even here in the Capitol.

"He's proud of you." I opened my mouth. " _Don't_ argue Mar. You kept your promise. It was a hard promise to keep." _I can break it at any time._ "I know you can choose to break it at any time..." _what the fuck.._ "but we both know you are stronger then that Mar. Even if you don't feel like you are." That was _creepy_. I feel a little better than before though. Peacekeepers hearded us towards where we would be lifted on to the stage. My grip on Finnick's hand tightened. He murmured sweet encouraging words. But I couldn't calm down.

"Okay Mar..." he tugged me towards him. "What's the game plan?" I swallowed hard. My throat on fire for no reason. "Mar..?"

"Be mysterious but humble. Be honest but vauge. My actions were out of grief and I wasn't thinking clearly." Finnick nodded softly. He brushed a few curls out of my face. The physical contact was what I needed in this moment. Instinctively leaning into his touch.

"Good. I'll be off to the side if you need me." Taking a breath he cupped my face. "Don't be afraid to cry... it's authentic and will back up your story. But... dont cry too much." _How the hell am I supposed to know what too much crying is._

"I don't want to watch my games Finn." A few tears leaked out. His gentle thumbs brushed them away.

"I know. I wish you had more time to adjust but the Capitol is getting antsy." Nodding in understanding we both shared a sigh. Caesar's introduction sounded. _Five minutes._ I closed my eyes softly. Releasing my face Finnick rested his forehead against mine. "You can do this Mar. You can." He whispered that again and again. A part of me wanted to punch him and scream how I _know_ I can, I don't _want_ to. I shouldn't _have_ to. A Peacekeeper grabbed Finnick leading him over to Mags. I panicked for a second. Finn sent sn encouraging smile my way before being lifted up. _One minute._ They rose up and I was alone in the dark. It wasn't for long. Soon the blinding lights of the Capitol flooded my vision. Somehow I managed a smile. I could see myself on camera which was a relief. I was holding up okay. _For now._

Ceaser joined me and lead the way to our seats. His electric smile shining at over 1000 volts. _To hell with the hydrodamn in Two, figure out how to get power from Ceaser. He's got too much energy anyway._ My thought didn't protray on my face thankfully. _It's just lying to the entire country... we've got this..._

I know Finnick said it was important to stay engaged in the footage. But the second Al appeared on screen I had to look away.

"Are you alright my dear?" _No I'm not alright you ass hole. That's my dead brother up there._

"I'm managing Ceaser... it's just... hard to see him and hear his voice. I still look for him and then I remember... it's been hard..." I'm breaking but I need to feed into the Capitol ego. "I know with all of the love and support of Panem that I'll be able to get through this..." I added a teary smile to the camera. The crowd went wild. Glancing towards Finnick he and Mags wore proud smiles. He sent me a subtle nod. _I'd done well._

The clips of Al and I were focused on our relationship. His death came on and I shut my eyes. I don't care if it's not what they want... this is footage of my brother dying... Caeser's overly manicured hand held mine gently. I sent him a fake greatful smile. Trying my hardest to block out the sounds of my screaming. We skipped over most of the games. Focusing on the other kills. None of the deaths I'd watched were in the final cut. My apologies weren't shown. Nor when I'd cut a piece of myself off to leave it with the fallen tributes. It was better that way. Finally the battle between the Careers then Daniel and I played in full. _He really did become a bastard..._

They did show my conversation with Daniel as we were dying. It surprised me. I wouldn't think that would be something Snow would allow. Then it was time for my crowning. My first face to face meeting with President Snow... he was everything I thought he would be. His eyes were even more menacing up close. He scrutinized my every feature. I tried to not shrink during our stare down.

"Congratulations on your victory."

"Thank you sir." I mumbled. Gritting my teeth.

"I expect great things from you Ms. Scur." We both knew what he was insinuating. My shoulders squared. _Shit..._

"I'll be sure to deliver." My voice growing colder.

"I hope you do." He muttered with a murderous smile. I took my final bow and walked off stage guided by Finnick. No one spoke until we were in the limo.

"What did he say Mar?" Finnick breathed. My eyes watered up. We exchanged a look that said it all. Every muscle in his body tensed. I grabbed his hand. Holding firmly. Keeping him grounded. _We'll have to do this a lot I suppose..._

The next day was my interview. Then home. I just want to get out of the damn Capitol. Ceaser was kind enough to avoid talking about Al too much. He did mention what happened to my stylist team. Since they were not present the day before.

"Well apparently they weren't very fond of me. And didn't want to take any credit for my appearance." With a nonchalant shrug I continued "their loss." We went back and forth a bit more before Ceaser got to the question of my final battle.

"So tell me Marjorie, your final kill has to have been one of the most outrageous we've ever seen." I laughed feeling each of the men in the audience cringe.

"I didn't think you'd want to talk about that Ceasar. I understand it's an uncomfortable topic for most men." The women in the audience laughed. Ceaser joined, though he seemed quite uncomfortable.

"Ha ha! That it is, but we all need to know. What was going through your mind?" it was the apex of the games though.

"That's an easy one. I was thinking, ' _If this bastard thinks I'm letting this fly, on national telivision no less, then he has another thing coming.'_ I also remembered what I'd learned in science class." Lie lie lie. I _never_ had time for school. "About how an erection happens you know. And I didn't want to be raped, or die. And I had a promise to keep."

"Yes you did. And against all odds you've survived!" He chuckled uncomfortably. "But please tell us more. How were you able to bite that body part off of his body?"

"It was the craziest thing I've ever done." I stated continuing. The audience was hanging on my every word. "But it was the best opening I had. He thought I was down for the count. The Capitol ended up saving my life."

"Really how so? Towards the end you refused Sponsor gifts. It was an unorthodox move."

"Expect the unexpected Ceaser." I chuckled. "But I would like to apologize to my sponsors. And thank them all for beleiving in me. From the bottom of my heart thank you. I wouldn't be alive withour your help." I dropped my gaze from the camera flickimg to the floor. "But towards the end, this was just something I had to do on my own." I turned to Caesar. "My strenght and greif is what drove me. After losing Al in that place a part of me snapped." _thats putting it mildly._ Going back for a moment I frowned. To the snow and the cold and the death..."A piece of me died." the warmth from my body had faded. I felt the cold seeping in.

"Is that what you were doing? Leaving a piece of yourself." Ceasar's voice snapped me out of my mind before I got too lost.

"Yes," i should not have said that. "stricken with the greif of my own loss I couldn't do anything but think of all the people we don't know who were waiting at home. Watching the death of their loved one." Grasping my chest and tugging a little on my heart the sensation rushed over me again. My perfect posture faltered. Hunching forward under the weight of emotion. "It was such an imence feeling of guilt and sympathy. All I could think of is ' _what if this were Ari, or Deidrick or Ruddy.'_ and I was at home watching them take their last breath alone. I would want someone to be there. I'd want someone to save them, but the tributes I encountered were long gone. Watching Al's death was horrifying but at least I got to hold him. I… just…" _snap out of it Mar. Do not cry on national television._ "I didn't want the families or fallen triutes to think they would be forgotten. Because I will never forget." Looking to the crowd they stared at me in awe and respect. It was odd. Caesar however looked extremely uncomfortable.

"Such a caring action. I'm sure it will not be forgotten any time soon." He cleared his throat. "But you were going to elaborate on how the Capitol saved your life..?"

"Oh yes. Well, I've never had carrots before. No real vegetables in Four you know. And they quickly became my favorite snack." Sending a smile to the audience I grabbed a carrot from the tray resting in front of me. Aralia made sure to have it set up for me. "As for the question of _how_ I bit his dick off well…." Taking a bite I chewed slowly. Making sure each crunch was heard clearly. After my snack was swallowed I continued with a wicked smirk. "It was just like that." The horror that spread across the audience was laughable. I was trying to hard to be serious but the way all their faces paled was hilarious.

"A breathtaking display from a strong and beautiful woman. Ladies and gentlemen! The Capitol Whirlwind from District Four and the winner of the 67th annual Hunger Games, Ms. Marjorie Scur!" _well.. the plan was to blow them away... mission accomplished I guess... Finnick said I had to smile. Smile. They are cheering, I must have done well. Where is Finnick or Mags?_

The lights dimmed and I stumbled off stage. The second I was off stage the panic I've been holding down started to come up. _Finnick. Mags. Aralia. Jackson. Finnick. Mags. Aralia. Jackson. Finnick. Mags. Aralia. Jackson. Where-wh-where are they?!_ Pressure started building on my chest. _Finnick. Mags. Aralia. Jackson._ I vaguely acknowledge there are other people back stage. But they aren't _my_ people. _Finnick. Mags. Aralia. Jackson._ Where. Where are they?

"F-fin-nnick.." my heart was poundimg in my ears and my arms started to shake. _I'm not safe here. Where are they?_ My hands started patting my waist and thighs for my knived but they aren't there. _Why don't I have my knives?! I'm weaponless and alone._ "M-m-mags?" _Is he hurting them. Did I not do well? Where are they?!_

Two hands clapped onto my shoulders. I jumped spinning around to see two Peacekeepers. I am small. I am threatened. But I AM NOT going down without a fight.

"This way Ms. Scur."

"What does Snow want?" I breathed out. Mostly to myself. I think they heard me though. That's based on the unnecessarily tight grip the two Peacekeepers used to hold me. I'd have bruses on both arms in under an hour I'm sure. _This is your life now._ It's a depressing thought. _The kids will never go with out anything ever again._ That gives me solace. Then I am standing in front of a large oak door. The smell of roses already causing my stomach to churn. A heavy fist knocked on the door.

"Come in!" The door opened and all of the air left my lungs. The lighting was clear, and surrounded by beautiful mahogany was President Snow. _The man of my nightmares._ Hiding my trembling is useless. He can tell; I know he can. Once the Peacekeepers are excused and the doors shut Snow's eyes meet mine.

"Who have you killed sir?" Snow laughed. An outright damn near joyful laugh.

"You truly are a remarkable young woman." His sick smile remained. Amusement oozed from his eyes. _He's enjoying this. Give him what he wants._

"Sir, I understand that you enjoy the power you hold over all of Panem. And its clear that my discomfort is bringing you even more pleasure. But could you please answer my question?" His silence was not helping my nerves. He was enjoying this more. "W-wh-where is my team?" I know that I'm squirming now. I know that there is not much I can do. I'm playing into his hand. Hoping he shows a few cards of his own. _I'll only ever see what he wants me to see._

"Your team has been escorted back to the Tribute Center."

"W-why? W-wh-what did I do?!" Tears and panic filled my soul. "Di-di-did I say something wrong?" My breathes started coming in even shorter bursts. Through my teary eyes I could see Snow's frown. This isn't what he wants to see. Rocking back and forth while rubbing my arms I looked down. "Wh-where are th-they?"

"I told you Ms. Scur."

"I want to see Leah. _Please."_ Snow was now glaring at me. _He wants weak and scared, not crazy._ "Leah is safe. Safe is safe. I am safe. My name is Marjorie. I live in district Four. I am an orphan. I hate oranges. I love purple or yellow carrots. I love to swim. I am... i am.. in the... Ca..Ca... where. Where am I?" I started to shake. "Where? Where? Where? Where?" I muttered the question repeatedly. Snow was clearly not impressed. I was soon dragged from the room and quickly sent back to the tribute center. _Thank god._ It had only been half an act. I _am_ terrified, but I know where I am. I know what day it is - _Thursday_ \- I leave for District Four tomorrow. I don't know where my team is. Or how my kids are. Or if they hate me. But I know that I have enough money to keep us all taken care of. Forever. The Peacekeepers were not careful with my 'shaking' form. Once in the elevator I was as alone as anyone can be in the Capitol. The elevator dinged and I was slammed into the back of the elevator by a salt smelling broad body.


End file.
